Why I’m glad my daughter is gone

Today’s Featured Comment

From Melissa F

I surprised everyone, including my friends, family, daughter and myself when she left for college 2 years ago.  We were very close and I had spent 18 years living my life for her.  Spent my time and money on her.  Neglected myself.  But I loved it because I loved her so much and she was and still is a wonderful, loving, delightful daughter.  I would rather spend time with her than anyone.

So everyone was afraid that I was going to be lost without her.  My family, including my daughter, were actually worried about how I was going to live without her and I was dreading her leaving.  What I didn’t expect was that I would regain some of my old self back after she left.  I lost 40 pounds in 5 months, took on 2 part-time jobs on top of my full time job, became the women’s social director at my church and rediscovered my relationship with my husband.  I felt great!  I felt younger, had more energy and found that I didn’t really miss her so much after all!

It has helped tremendously that she is only 2 hours away and we text each other almost daily so I still feel very connected to her.  I still love to spend time with her and enjoy visiting and staying in her apartment and hanging out with her and her friends.  I feel a little blue when I come home after a visit, but I don’t pine away for her and enjoy my life as an independent adult!

I enjoy having less responsibility and the ability to make last minute plans and go out whenever I want to.  And I love my new relationship with my young adult daughter.

[This comment was originally posted in this conversation. ~ Eds.]


Posted in family & relationships, other topics, work & money.

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3 Responses

  1. Barbara Younger Barbara Younger says

    I had a pretty easy time when my last daughter left too! I had heard from some others that empty nest is a blast, and they’re right. Love cell phones and google chat and visits for staying in touch, but yep, there’s a whole new world out there.

    1 like

  2. Sharon Greenthal Sharon Greenthal says

    I had a hard time at first when my daughter left for college, but quickly discovered the benefits of being a big separate from each other. Now she is graduated and back home while she looks for a job and, to be honest, it’s a huge adjustment on my part (and certainly for her too). In fact, both of my kids are home for a while and we are kind of in a bit of shock!!!

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  3. Generic Image Deb says

    Thanks for sharing your successful transition. There IS life after kids in our home. It’s a great time of life – we are young enough to tackle so many new opportunities – and old enough to do it well. Children leaving our home and going on with their lives are the hallmark of genuine success for all concerned.

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