I have wanted to be a Ph.D. in anthropology for over 15 years. The reason I haven’t been to school yet is because I got a bachelors and two masters by the time I was 31 and was really burned out. They were in different fields and I have no college credits in anthropology. I am well read and I do not mind taking the deficiencies that would be necessary. I talked with the chair of the department today and I mostly came away with the belief that I am too old, I probably can’t score high enough on the GRE to get in, and they only accept 1/3 of their applicants; therefore, someone with a degree in anthropology would certainly have a better chance than I would. I am interested in evolutionary psychology, and when I told him that and that I have a master’s in counseling, he seemed to think that increased my odds – the relationship of the degree to the program and their new professor who is researching that area and has no grad students working under him yet. So I have e-mailed him. But I think I have to accept the fact that I may not be able to get in. My age is going to make the school see me as someone who can’t go out and be placed easily and do a lot of prestigious research to add to their reputation.
Does anyone have any ideas for how I can make this happen? Or if not, how can I stop feeling like I lost out on the thing I really wanted to do most in life. I’m extremely sad about this.
Oh my gosh! I felt your inner pain ... and I apologize for the fact that when I got to the part about setting your hair on fire, I laughed. I'm so glad you weren't hurt, and hair grows back. Perhaps a new hair-do would not only rectify the situation 
There is no such thing as a legal separation in my state..The only way I can get husband out of the house is to force him out..He refuses to leave..I would have to file for divorce and get temporary orders including a restraining order..
I feel so
doggiediva - I live in Florida which is a no fault divorce state. Everything that was accumulated during a marriage has to be divvied up 50/50. Unfortunately, he has nothing but the house to offer you. Because of your health situation he may not be e
Okay…I had the meeting and felt very different than after I talked with the department chair. The professor I talked to today was far more encouraging, told me what I need to do, will meet with me again and I really believe that based on what he told me, I have more like an 80 – 90% chance of being accepted rather than a 10% chance. So I have some research to do, which will be fun, and I’ll most likely take the GRE this fall and apply for next fall’s admission, which is due by January 10. Thanks for all the encouragement. It’s still not a certainty, but I think there’s a lot more hope. Dana
Here’s something relevant: http://chronicle.com/article/The-Multi-Track-PhD/134738/
Excerpt:
The crisis in humanities graduate education is coming to an end. But don’t take out the party hats yet, because the situation in the trenches hasn’t improved much. Academic jobs are still few and far between, and graduate education remains on shaky ground both institutionally and socially. Nevertheless, two generations of “crisis thinking” are finally giving way to the idea that we’re not in a crisis—because no crisis would last this long. Instead we’re confronting a new normal, and we have to adjust accordingly.
Bravo, Dana! This is really the best place to start – you’ve gotten more information, and you can continue to research it and make a decision. I think at this moment, it’s the best of all possible solutions.
I agree. Thank you, tiya. I’m so glad I found this website. It’s been so encouraging and helped me realize not to give up too easily. Also, I asked pointedly about my age. He did not think that should be a problem unless I want a tenure track professorship, which could be more difficult. And he told me to ask any other frank questions I have. I think he’s on my side, and I really haven’t felt that way about a person “in charge” of anything I do for a really long time. It was nice. Dana
GO for it!!!
I am, buenasedasal, I am! I have a plan and feel pretty confident about it.
I don’t have any specific advice, but some cheesy internet encouragement! In the olden olden olden days, medical schools pretty much rejected anybody who was over 30. My aunt, a PhD in biochem who then spent almost 20 years at home, decided to go to medical school in her 50s. I was shocked (shocked!) that she was accepted. She divorced a perfectly nice husband (as far as *I* knew), estranged herself from her lovely kids (now that one I stand by) and changed both first AND last names. For the rest of her life, she practiced psychiatry under what I can only call an assumed name.
So yeah, she wasn’t necessarily the best example all in all, but she did get into and through a program that really thought that young adults were the only ones capable of taking a medical degree. She showed them.
I’m not sure why, but that story made me laugh out loud. Thanks, Dennie. I think what I got most from it was entertainment, lol, but I also guess that shows that anyone can do anything they want if they are determined enough. I mean, geez, look what she did! I now wonder if she is my psychiatrist.
No, she died several years ago. I wonder how good she could have been at it? When I called her to tell her that my father, her only brother, had died, she said “I’m sorry for your sake, but it doesn’t mean anything to me.”. Odd woman.
You are being awfully kind. She does sound odd and a bit “mean”?
At times, one must shut out all the extraneous noise in order to Thrive.
Ah, yes, very timely. I really am learning “mindfulness” as a way of being. I have tons of internal chatter and I see that what you say is important. I’ve had some sort of “enlightened” moments in the past couple of weeks. I found this group, which has been completely supportive and wonderful, I have an excellent therapist, and I have my own personal guru – at least that’s what I call him. He’s teaching and supporting my journey into mindfulness.
I agree; I have to learn to do that and I am. I don’t think it’s something that can be rushed. So I feel good about my progress just because there is some.
Yesterday I practiced mindfulness in my garden. Our next door chicken happened to be sitting on top of our fence and I didn’t realize it until I got quiet and started looking around. I squatted slowly so I wouldn’t scare her off and watched her until she jumped back into her yard. That was a great example of shutting out extraneous noise.
You have great insights. Thanks for sharing them with me.
i must tell you this. i am now 69, but I went to medical school at age 53. I decided that it was too long to go for MD so I went for Physician associate(which has been known as Assistant, but now name is changing, since we do the same work as MD and work alone).
i did it!
It was tough. I had to first get my bachelors degree but then i entered the medical school at 53 for the P.A. degree. I was up all night. My brain was sooooo overworked, but here I am.
Now I see i could have gone 4 more years, and should have done MD.
Do whatever you want!
I did it so i could leave my husband and have good money.
buenasedal – i understand and agree. It is called survival.
Perfectly said, buenasdasal, and something to
remember when the internal/external chatter feels overwhelming. Thanks for this.
I think many of us have some memory of women’s struggles to have fulfilling lives when there were many more obstacles to that goal. While the the psychiatrist sounded very chilly, my first reaction was to wonder what she perhaps went through to reach that point.
I am reminded of an aunt who was one of three women in her law school graduating class in the early 1940s. Every time she was preparing for the bar exam some family drama interrupted and she would fail. After the third try, she gave up and spent the rest if her life running the family’s very small dry cleaning business – pressing pants, sewing, sending out laundry. Certainly that’s nothing to be ashamed of but she wanted something else for herself. She also supported her mother and sent her two brothers to college and graduate school. Her life was a small and frustrated one, waiting on her family, all of them telling her what to do. She had migraines and other stress-related ailments. She never married and I felt her brothers didn’t treat her well, tho’ she was fiercely loyal to them.
When I think about her experience, I can only imagine what back story, what circumstances have led some women to make other choices. We may be shocked but we might think differently, or maybe not, if the whole picture were. Leader.
whoops…I meant to write….’if the whole picture were clearer’. That’s what you get from writing off your iPhone!
Yeah and I think our brains read those things corrected because I didn’t even see the error until you pointed it out. Those are great points about the back story. I have a good friend who is a therapist, and she says that people “come about who they are honestly.” I like that. Things may look bad and this person may have a negative image but the story that brought them to that place is an honest story. I like it because it doesn’t excuse bad behavior but it puts it in a more real perspective.
And, anonymous, I’m really impressed with what you did. I think it’s great. It is time for me to change my career, and it’s more about happiness than money, but I completely understand needing to leave a spouse and needing to make a living. I went through that with my kids’ father before I left. I didn’t change careers, but I had to be very ‘planful’ to succeed at it.
These stories are truly inspirational. I’ve taught a lot of diversity types of subjects and one is about generations in the workplace. Millennials are characterized as likely to entirely change careers in their lifetimes, not just jobs, and it looks to me like a lot of baby boomer women have done the same thing.
Go full steam ahead!!!!
I just discovered this thread and see you’ve received plenty of excellent advice and encouragement. Still, I feel moved to add another tale. I returned to school for an advanced degree in a new field at 46, nervous as hell, and was surprised when I did better on the GRE this second time than when I was 21. Our brains do improve and retain! One thing led to another — obviously this was the right path for me — and 15 years later, I’m a tenured professor in that field, though I couldn’t have imagined that back then, nor was it my goal. Now it’s my pleasure to welcome and mentor women over 50 in the graduate program where I teach, whether M.A. or Ph.D. It is never too late, and the results may surprise you. Your world will open, for sure. There are lots of things you can “do” with these degrees; one of the most important is doing for yourself.
Hello,
I am in the same delima. I would love to return get a BA, I have started serveral time, for whatever reason, mostly family drama. I stop persuding it, A BA in Hospitality, I am 62 the voices I hear you are to old, who will hire you. I have dreams working for a great chain after a couple years, I am a lover of hotels. I see myself making a big differance, within hotel industry.
I am going full steam ahead. I’m really excited now. The subfield is one that is not taught in many universities anywhere, and this professor I met with a couple of weeks ago has this area as a focus. Maybe they see this as a chance to make a name in a field that is really new to anthropology. Even if I don’t get in here, I will either try again or try a different school. I have thought of many ways to apply this education to the study of mental health.
annmmc, thanks for sharing your story. That was really motivating to me. I know it is never too late, and I am so “buoyed” by success stories, so thank you for sharing yours (maybe I should apply to your university – I don’t even know what you study, j/k).
romoe, do it if you want to. You aren’t too old and isn’t the education a good enough end in itself to not be as concerned about it being a means to an end (the perfect job)? If you see yourself as someone who can make a big difference, then I’m sure you can. Go for it; we all want to benefit from your contribution when we stay in hotels!
Thanks all! Dana
Oh and I meant to mention as far as the GRE, this professor told me they were looking at GRE results to see if we can write. I can write and that is what I want to do with this education. So I feel more confident. My writing ability is a whole lot better than it was fresh out of college.
Also, today my book came in the mail that he suggested I read to get a handle on the historical context of the field. It’s a great book and I already know half of it from taking history and systems of psychology. I loved that class and remember lots of it. It’s looking more and more like this is who I am, and I’m really excited about it!
Pls. take note (scroll up) for posting on “Multi-track Ph.D.” containing practical ideas to incorporate so that it becomes possible to complete a Ph.D. in a timely fashion. Some may probably be applicable/negotiable to work into your choice of prospective program. Good luck!
Pls. take note (scroll up) for recent posting I made on “Multi-track Ph.D.” containing practical ideas to incorporate so that it becomes possible to complete a Ph.D. in a timely fashion. Some may probably be applicable/negotiable to work into your choice of prospective program. Good luck!
I’ll look for it. Thanks!