We have one grown son in his early thirties. He has always worked hard, had always had a job but he is sold on the thought that, if you do what you love, the money will follow. He is now working for a non-profit charity, loving the challenge of helping others, feeling that he is giving back to the world etc.
Problem is his job does not pay enough for him to live where he needs to live in order to have the job. He is quite frugal but the city is expensive. Now he has married and his wife has some veyr serious health issues so she will not be able to work,.
We have been helping him out financially but we just can’t keep doing this forever. But how do we leave him high and dry? We love him but we are not all that young any more, are on fixed pensions and worry about what is coming down the road for us.
Anyone have a wonderful idea that will help?
Thank you, Mimi. That's where I find my Mom now, too - in my heart. Her good advice is always there. It sounds like your Mom had words of wisdom that we all could use. Thanks again.
I don't have any advice but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone...I am in a very similar situation in regards to my financial future..I haven't filed for divorce yet but I have consulted with several lawyers..I seem to be in the same bo
I think words are really important when you are trying to understand the how and why of this situation. Making "blanket" statements like and using words like "pity" and even "love" require a lot of subjective interpretation.
Maybe breaking it down
I believe there are more parents that can relate to your concern and question. Sit down and explain to him just what you told us.
I am very nearing 60, was married (separated almost 6 years…and no end in site, due to his addiction)and have 3 great adults kids. We lived very comfortably, I had the pleasure to be a stay at home mom, but never felt that I was put on this earth to be a financial sacrifice to my kids or any other sacrifice for that matter. Of course I love all my kids to the moon and back but never felt I wanted better or more for them, only if they did and were willing to work for it. I strongly feel that this is a major aspect of what our kids generation is about. I call it the entitlement generation. They want it now and expect their parents, grandparents to cough it up, refinance their homes, give up their hard earned retirement. Nope…not me! These kids of ours need to work hard for what THEY want, make their own sacrifices, be patient and most of all BE GRATEFUL. They have more “stuff” than most of the others around the world.
ok…I’m off my soap box!