I am a department head and a peer (dept. head also) is undermining my job. She is trying to turn her staff against my dept. and goes behind my back to the principal. She has done this to every teacher and dept. head at the school, and they are telling me it is just “my turn” to get this behavior. The 3 previous times she did this the principal called me in to talk about it, and she and I met and compromised, but this latest incident he has not called me in, and in fact has recommended me for a very lucrative position during the summer.
I am at a loss at what to do. Confront her? File a grievance (which in reality puts a black mark on MY record), or just stay the course as a professional and ignore her petty machinations?
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i use a combo of shea butter and aloe vera moisturizer. Works great. I use shea butter on my lips, around my eyes and nose (dry areas), My father swears by vasoline.
p.s. I dropped your name on Gina's post, Barb. ;)
Read the good Professor Sutton’s excellent book, The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn’t.
Be happy.
Thank you yakkity1, I am a reader (I am the head librarian at my school!) and this sounds like a great book. My daughter had an even worse boss, so I will buy two!
Thanks for your response. This is my first post and I am so happy to get responses!
Ignore.
Forni wrote some great books — “Choosing Civiiity” and another on handling rudeness.
Another good book suggestion, thank you Forni. I do like to read self-help books when I am having an issue.
Well, you can ignore her, or you can wait until there is a good time and confront her personally one to one. Sometimes bullies need to be confronted and stopped. Begin with “this is off the record between you and i….”
Lynnette, Jender and yakkity, I think I will ignore for a little while, read up on how to handle her, and then “gently” confront as Lynnette suggested, when the time is right. We are getting close to state testing, and I don’t know why the heck she chose to stir up trouble at this crucial time for the students and teachers.
Your book suggestions are awesome, I did not know there were such books out there! Thanks!
Update on sitch:
The Monday after the latest confrontation, she came into my workspace and acted as if nothing had ever happened! Also, several of her teachers told me privately she is on some sort of HRT/thyroid meds (no one really knows what) and she has been behaving very “crazy” for about 6 months, in a nutshell she is backstabbing everyone, not just moi!
You know, I hate to label a fellow woman “crazy”. It’s so easy to call someone crazy, but I’m afraid if I do Karma will strike back and I will become the Crazy Lady!
For now, I am letting it all ride. My Principal has been confiding in me a lot the past few days, and not talking to her at all (per his secretary who happens to be one of my best friends) so maybe that’s his way of showing his faith in me???? Typical passive man….
excuse me but i have to ask: this crazy lady teaches children? And if so, what ages?
Yes, she teaches junior high students, and she is the department head for 22 other teachers. It’s very upsetting for most of us on the faculty. The administrators are turning a blind eye. I don’t think she harasses the students, just other faculty members who refuse to be her minions.
I will say that one faculty member went to the principal yesterday about her. Several of use got together and decided not to let this go on, and insist it be addressed.
I try to stay out of the school gossip, and really at my school there is not much of that. So, when this woman attacked me I naturally gave her respect of listening and thinking perhaps she had a point. After a few days of asking around, I found that others on the faculty have had the same problems with her over the years, and never took it further. Well, she is to the point of destroying morale, so we are NOT “letting is go” any longer.
Thank you for the responses!
scary!