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If in your golden years you can not/not will not, care for yourself, Are you preparing to make it easier on your children , like saving for your future? Being as healthy as possible? Putting things in order? Just asking
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Hi again. I have to laugh. My friend Gina Mcnew just wrote a blog post about the myriad of skincare and beauty products women use compared to men. And how it gets crazy as we get older. I laughed my butt off! I thought you ladies would enjothank you so much Lisa, that helps a lot. I know he tried to blame me for so much stuff, but like I told all of his family and mine none of that added up to a divorce. I do realize it's his needs, it just hurts so bad to think how many years he'sI used Noxzema from the time I was old enough to wash my own face, all through school and into adulthood. Then I decided it wasn't 'sophisticated' enough and went with higher priced, higher end products. About 5 years ago, I went back to I used Noxzema from the time I was old enough to wash my own face, all through school and into adulthood. Then I decided it wasn't 'sophisticated' enough and went with higher priced, higher end products. About 5 years ago, I went back to my old faithMost of the above posts are by women, and many of you seem insecure about your sexuality at your age. Please don't be! While it's true that many of us guys prefer younger women, there are some (like me) that find women over 50 much sexier.
This sounds stupid, Track, but I actually was stupid enough to depend on my ex to be with me and to take care of me in my “golden” years. I actually believed all the promises and lies. But enough. Now I’m just trying to make it day to day. I KNOW that I’ll be older sooner than later, but right now I’m just trying to survive TODAY!!! I don’t know what I’m going to do – to be honest with you – but I do know I have to do something. One thing my experience with my ex has taught me is to NOT depend on anyone but myself, but I still don’t know what I’ll do when I get into my “golden” years. I’m looking into a lot of things, but with the way the world is today and the way the economy is today, I’m lucky if I make it to tomorrow. Right now I consider myself blessed just to have a job that’s putting a roof over my head and helping me to get my business off the ground. And let’s not even talk about saving, because it’s like the more I try to save the higher prices get just to make it from day to day and it eats away at what little savings I have. I mean – really – have you seen the price of a quart of milk these days?
We all started out like that! It didn’t take him 6 mos to start winking and blinking at someone else living in the same building, oh well! Right about depending on someone. My second husband started to have health problems and told my daughter he wants me back, “Not going to happen”, they always want to return when things go south and I am not desperate. Looking for someone the cook, clean and care for them, the nerve. Thanks for writing….TRACK
TRACK – stay strong!!! You & I both know the only reason he wants you back is so you can take care of him in the manner in which he DIDN’T take care of you!!! He must be suffering from serious brain degeneration. I don’t know what’s wrong with men these days – but they all seem to need serious help. I – too – am not desperate. I have found the best way to do it is to do it for yourself by yourself!!!
They are all the same girls, just the name changes…..
And yes your right Persimian, we need to depend and look out for ourselves first so we can take care of our own. I have no desire to have any man in my life again….My home and children are enough to take care of!
Amen my friend Miss persimian! You and I are in the same place aren’t we?!…. But when my ex walked out 10 years ago with all our money from the accts and his young girlfriend I had 45 cents to my name, 5 kids at home and a 7.5 acre horse farm with a 1500.00 mortgage due the following week. Which of course he promptly told me it was my problem now not his…..
Can’t tell you how I made it and still housed and fed all the kids etc. But God is good and he provided over and over again. I’m like you doing the very best I can with what I have at this point in time and trusting that he will take care of the rest! I will know when it’s time and what to do by his direction and so will you!
Enjoy spring is here and it’s a fresh start for all of us!
Sandi
I sure am…first of all, I would never want to put that kind of burden on my child. My hubby is considerably older than me…so the odds that I will be on my own (hopefully, with some of my best girlfriends around) are considerable. I started saving for my future, years ago…before I was even married.
My daughter is just a teen, she doesn’t need to even worry about me, she has her own life to think about….I may not end up living in luxury, but I think it will be somewhat comfortable!
But children that have been loved for themselves will want to make sure the parents are fine and doing well. However, I have found that many have not saved one penny and now want their children to see they have everything in their golden years, so the question. Maybe it will wake up some to keep healthier and not spend every cent. Thanks for writing…TRACK
Also, I already have my living will in order, so she won’t have to worry about whether or not to pull the plug, should it come to that!
Thank goodness we are financially stable. I am putting our paperwork in order to facilitate life for me and my children. Just keeping up with the healthcare choices is hassle.
I HAD TO GET SOMEONE ELSE TO UNDERSTAND MY MOTHERS CHOICES, THEY CONFUSE THE SENIORS AND THEY KNOW IT’S NOT RIGHT! Thanks for writing…TRACK
About Prescription Plans – Medicare Part D? You choose one because it’s the cheapest and after 3 years, they triple the cost. Believe me, it’s a non-ending battle to try to keep costs down.
When i first got married at age 19 the best advice i received from a friend was “always put some money away on your own name and don’t tell anybody”. I was 19 and now i am 59. At first i ignored it, as any young new bride would, but soon i found out the logic and truth to it. So yes, i saved mostly on my 401K and it gets matched. I lost some bucks, but is coming back very nicely and i bought while it was low so i will be ok, not rich, but ok. Trust my health withstands the age and then i am all set… a few more years left. I am tempted to sell my house and get into a smaller place but then the price of the homes are down, but i will be able to buy a lot cheaper. The other option is to put a lot into the principal of this house and sell when i am ready to buy in 5 years. Decisions, decisions.
Hoping mine will come back also. We all took a good beating with those we bailed out!
Thanks…..TRACK
The first thing I did at an early age was to raise my children with the help of their father to be selfsufficeint, to get educated but to be capable of using their hands and minds to take care of themselves, in the event their “education cushion” fails there are as many people educated and degreed without work or doing “low income jobs” as thoes who are uneducated but know how to survive.
I have given the example to give back and care for others…..
What I am now doing is taking better care of my health, eating more healthy, walking again, and most of all
simplfying our lives, getting rid of many things like closing down a 2, 000 sq ft, warehouse, the less our children have to deal with like our “things” the better they will be, having our “modest” house paid for gives them time to make choices, unlike when my mother died the rent house had to be empitied, soon.
Even eif I leave my cnhildren not a penny, they will be alright , we haae taught them “how to fish”. they all are buying homes, and one
Now it shows up unfinished and un- edited!!!! (lol) What’s going on here?
Track good question.
I just lost a long reply (OOOOOOOOOOOh) Don’t you hate that?
so……We have prepared our children with the ability to fish and create more fishing….. they are educated, but better than that they know how to survive, save, and do for themselves, they won’t be easy to “rip off’ they are not moved by labels and status, they all own homes, they can afford, and are working toward their golden years.
If I leave them not one dime….they will be OK, what I am doing is keeping busy and letting them live their lives, getting my life more simplified, by getting rid of “stuff” that I do not want to saddle them down with.
Taking even better care of my health and finding my happiness without making them feel responsible.
I do not waste my time trying to teach them , as they should be teaching and helping others, my time is now for the journey that only I can live out for me as I try to make a difference for the future generation….my grand children and others.
In the event of ill health we have a plan that will free them from having to take care of us……beside I have a personal contract with GOD when I can no longer do for others or even help myself I am out of here…………….
I just read your post on clutter to VN women, written 9/09. We have things in common.
sorry, i won’t leave my life in somebody else’s hands (friends and or families), whether i am healthy or not. i took care of my mother, when she was well and sick, i would NOT burden my friends especially my children.
I am seeing what I can do not to be a financial burden and constant care on her. I have my own life and friends, with activities. Will not make her my whole life. But if I need help I expect her to be there but want my own money not to tie her up in living her life. That’s how I see it, thanks for writing….TRACK
thanks, my mother has since pass on. and i have my life back. my life with my mother is WHOLE different topic.