Dr. Dorree Lynn Denounces Claims Made in Mark Wallace’s book “Sex Drive Magic”
In early September 2011 I received an email from Dr. Patti Britton regarding my name, image, and credibility being used to support and market Mark Wallace’s book “Sex Drive Magic” and associated websites. Yes, I was interviewed by Mr. Wallace earlier this year but I regret to report that I have been misquoted and misrepresented in his book.
Upon learning of this situation, I requested Mr. Wallace remove me from his websites and from his book immediately. To my knowledge, so have several, if not all, of the other experts that Mr. Wallace interviewed and included in his book.
While situations like these are sometimes unavoidable, they, like many awkward and unavoidable situations in life, provide us with an opportunity to either learn and/or teach ourselves and others. Hopefully Mr. Wallace has learned a lesson in referencing direct quotes from other people. I have learned a lesson on how to handle situations like this, and we’re all about to learn the important things to know about sex toys, factors killing your sex drive, medications to avoid, and libido enhancing foods.
Allow me to set the record straight on these topics that were covered in Mr. Wallace’s book, just in case there’s any confusion. Text from “Sex Drive Magic” will be identified as SDM and the transcript of my interview with Mr. Wallace will be defined by my initials DL. I shall mark my responses in italics. NOTE: The text from the transcript has not been confirmed by my staff, as all we received was the text copy (not the audio). Punctuation has been added, but nothing else has been changed from the transcript. That being said, please excuse any poor grammar, as the text is of a conversation, in which I expect my tone and message fluctuated in the way that happens when you’re trying to explain something verbally.
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SDM: Dr. Dorree Lynn is a psychologist, sexologist, life coach and best selling author of three books on sexual health and relationships. She is a highly sought after speaker and media expert that has been featured in countless magazines such as Men’s Health, Time, News Week, USA Today and many more!
She was thoughtful enough to provide us with her expert insight as to how YOU and anyone else can raise libido and strengthen their relationship all at once using natural, safe methods that have been tested and proven to work.
Thank you for the kind introduction, but I never claimed that any method was safe for everyone, nor did I claim that any method had been tested and proven to work. And I certainly did not claim that ALL of them were safe and tested and proven to work. Also, my three books are on psychotherapy, caregiving, and sex for grownups. They are not all about sex and relationships.
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SDM: Important Information on Sex Toys: As men and women get older, it’s natural that our bodies will begin to give out on us. Your sex drive is no different from the other functions in your body. So let’s think about this for a minute. What happens when an elderly person has lost the ability to walk?
Give up? They get an “Aid” so to speak such as a walker, cane, scooter, or even a wheelchair to help them out correct? Why not treat your sex drive the exact same way? I strongly recommend (*in the book, the sentence ended at “recommend”)
DL: (on talking about how sex doesn’t have to stop when you get older) Sex is your birthright. And if you pay attention to it, it goes on forever. And let’s start breaking the myth that it ends with menopause and you need a little blue pill, which doesn’t work half the time anyway. And I will tell you why.
Sexuality, especially in the US, is just simply hormone driven. You know, your brains are all in your penis or your vagina and you don’t think about it.
And then of course when you hit 50 or older and people kind of put you out on an ice floe because they think it no longer exists, the truth is that it’s the over-50 population in the US that is becoming, the over-50 is the largest purchasers of products.
We use eyeglasses. We use hearing aids. We use walkers. We get ill. We use all of these aids. Why not use sexual aids as well?
In the copy of the e-book that Mr. Wallace sent me, the advice I had given on sexual aids had not been completed, it simply ended at recommend, and was highlighted in red as if to suggest it was never finished and later forgotten about. I believe my quote from the transcript accurately addresses the issue nicely.
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SDM: 3 Factors that are KILLING your Sex Drive!: Aside from the usual “Stress” that can be killing your sex drive as well as your sex life, there’s also three other main sex drive killers that most people are being negatively effected by daily and don’t even know it. They are as follows: not enough exercise, not enough sleep, too much alcohol.
You absolutely need an adequate amount of sleep and exercise daily in order to be healthy overall as well as within your sexual functions. Contrary to popular belief, alcohol is not the key to having great sex either while you’re under the influence or after. Alcohol has the ability to weaken your sex drive over time.
DL: The simplest answer with lack of libido/sex drive is when you have no interest. Period…There is always a reason. People are not born with a lack of sex drive. The brain is the biggest sex organ. So if they’ve had an emotional or psychological trauma or it could be a religious inhibition, they don’t have an obvious sex drive.
And I want to be very careful about what I say here, because people who speak anti-sex, and you and I both know this, are 9 times out of 10 people who are doing something on the side. And I’m not speaking against religions but that’s what happened with the Catholic Church and celibacy and preachers who speak against sexuality. And all the rest, they’re living secret lives.
The more out in the open communication is, the quicker your sex drive is going to become available. There are two reasons for lack of libido or sex drive.
One is physiological and that can be anything from hormone related. And I’m sure you understand all of that, you know, the mixture between testosterone and estrogen and progesterone for both women and men.
And then, it can be thyroid related. It can be in the pituitary, thyroid, adrenal system because those are the temperatures of the body. Or you can have something that is simply misdiagnosed as it’s frequently misdiagnosed.
So you can have a physiological reason but nobody really knows in factly or very few people know in factly when it is physiological and when it is psychological. And from my point of view, I rarely care how you intersect it first. But if one doesn’t work, you try the other.
And in my own experience, I’ve had fantastic results as a psychologist and sexologist with increasing people’s libido primarily by getting they to talk about their feelings.
…nobody is going to convince me, except postmenopausally, when you have actual physiological changes or unless you have a testable physiological deficiency, hormone deficiency. I believe it is more often something emotional and psychological. People’s equipment works. If you can masturbate, it means your equipment is working.
…Alcohol, cigarettes, too little sleep, all of that kind of stuff. Most people live on a plane and pay-later (play now and pay later) principle. Only pay-later creeps up faster than you think. So yes, too much alcohol, not enough exercise, not enough sleep all impact desire.
Yes, alcohol, sleep and exercise can all affect (not effect) libido. But Mr. Wallace made no reference to the bigger issue, the brain. Because more often than not, it’s actually YOU that is killing your sex drive.
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SDM: Medications to Avoid: Stress is already a serious libido killer and Dr Lynn goes on to explain that it gets even worse after you seek professional help. What happens is doctors prescribe antidepressant medication to you in hopes of treating your depression and maybe it works and maybe it doesn’t. But what is for sure is that, all Antidepressants are HUGE libido killers. They drastically lower your sexual energy and overall sex drive.
Mixing antidepressants with other prescriptions drugs that are being used to successfully treat other ailments will react badly for your sex drive with the antidepressants. It’s like a two headed sword.
In the end, this actually kills your sex drive in 3 different ways: the initial stress that leads to depression, the antidepressant drugs that you take, the mixture of antidepressants and with other prescription and OTC drugs.
So in essence she’s saying that you need to avoid antidepressants at all costs and use the stress relieving techniques that you’ll learn in this book. The natural way is always the best way.
DL: Stress is a physiological killer. If it kills the natural production of hormones, you will get basically adrenal fatigue. And with adrenal fatigue, there’s tremendous market for products that deal with the secondary sexual issues. With adrenal fatigue you also get emotional fatigue and you get depression and you get lack of desire. So it’s very hard to differentiate between lack of desire and depression.
…And one of the biggest issues, particularly as people get older, is that very few health care providers, very few physicians really understand drug interactions. And frequently, if you give a drug and an antidepressant, it will kill desire immediately and the poor person doesn’t even know what happened to them…you have to become an informed consumer.
I would NEVER offer the general advice to avoid antidepressants! In response to whether or not someone should use antidepressants and / or other prescription and OTC drugs, I would tell my client to consult with their doctor. If they didn’t like the side effects of the medication, I would advise therapy and work with them to manage their depression through alternative methods. However, I would never advise someone to abandon a medication that they need to be on in order to be mentally and physically healthy.
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SDM: Libido Enhancing Foods: According to Doctor Dorree Lynn, dark chocolate and oysters are incredibly powerful aphrodisiacs that can drastically raise libido very quickly and they taste fantastic. Feel free to eat as much of these types of food as possible when aiming to raise your libido.
While there are many foods that if eaten regularly or at all for that matter can and will drastically lower your libido, foods such as these will actually raise your libido. Increasing your intake will do lots of good just don’t overdo it.
DL: Dark chocolate has flavinoids and it’s great for your sex life as do oysters have. They’re real foods that are sexual enhancers.
First, it’s flavonoid, not flavinoid. Second, chocolate and oysters aren’t good for everyone. In fact, they can make a lot of people very sick. For that reason, among others, I would never advise anyone to “eat as much of these types of food as possible!”
Second, the aphrodisiac effects of chocolate aren’t fully supported by the entire scientific community. Yes, dark chocolate contains flavonoids, but many companies process the chocolate to a point where the flavonoids have been reduced if not removed all together. You have to be educated when looking to purchase dark chocolates with high levels of flavonoids. Flavonoids, according to WebMd.com, keep cholesterol from gathering in blood vessels, reduce the risk of blood clots, and slow down the immune responses that lead to clogged arteries. The idea that chocolate is good for your libido stems from flavonoids’ ability to promote healthy blood flow.
Oysters have long been rumored to be an aphrodisiac, with many citing an oyster’s resemblance to a vagina. However, recent studies have shown oysters to be rich in amino acids that trigger increased levels of sex hormones and a high zinc content that can aid in the production of testosterone. However, there’s a reason that restaurants are required to post signs in their businesses warning people to eat oysters at their own risk. Oysters are filter feeders, so if you’re eating an oyster you’re also eating whatever it’s been filtering. This is one reason why people with liver and kidney problems should stay away from eating oysters.
The bottom line when it comes to food that will boost your libido is to eat as healthy as possible and to try to keep your body and mind as healthy as possible. You can’t fill your gut with fast food every day and then come home and eat a dozen oysters and expect to get an erection like never before. And when you plan your diet, feel free to include dark chocolate and oysters, as long as your doctor agrees that you’re healthy enough to eat them.
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While I am very disappointed in Mr. Wallace’s failure to accurately represent the views and opinions of the experts in his book, including my advice, I am thankful to have had the opportunity clarify my position on these issues and subjects. As professionals, we all aim to provide insight and advice in ways that promote healthy and educated discussion and decision-making. It is our responsibility, as professionals, to protect and educate innocent victims of miseducation.