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Summer Survival Guide for the Midlife Woman
Healthy Living
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Summer is HERE and hot, humid temperatures are here too. How are you going to survive this summer?

Here are a dozen tips to keep you cool despite menopausal moments…

survive during summer

  1. Get a pedicure today and wear open toe shoes until the temperature dips below 60° or Christmas.
  2. Wear loose necklines and sleeveless tops. Hate your upper arms and can’t get over it? Layer with a thin layer or wear a short sleeve top.
  3. Try a big beautiful hat. Think Kentucky Derby grandeur because then it becomes a fashion focal point, and keeps you a bit cooler.
  4. Wear underwear. I know the thought of putting on a bra and panties when you are so damn hot can sometimes seem like cruel punishment but decorum must be maintained!
  5. Do not take off too many layers. Yes you are too old to just wear a sports bra.
  6. I know I will get some back talk but No you cannot wear short shorts. I know they are cute cut-offs but you are menopausal not prepubescent.
  7. No Spanx or tight fitting pants if you can help it.
  8. Don’t sit outside unless there is a cool breeze and you are in the shade.
  9. Discretely place a few ice cubes down your bra if you are eating with friends, family or at a meeting.
  10. Invest in waterproof make-up for the summer. That includes eye shadow, eyebrow pencil, eyeliner and lipstick.
  11. Is a short haircut, especially at your nape in your future?
  12. Reduce your alcohol intake. Don’t call me that name! Alcohol often triggers a hot flash. It also compromises some good judgment choices like taking off one too many layer or jumping into a fountain. Just saying…

Are you ready for summer? Do you have additional tips?

Updated from May, 2014. Originally posted on


Melinda Myers
8 Tips for A Beautiful Garden This Summer
Home & Garden
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get your garden off to a good start

Get out the shovel and trowels – it’s Memorial Day weekend and that means gardening for many. Spend a bit more time getting your garden off to a good start and reap the benefits all season long.

Proper planting and post-planting care means less maintenance, fewer pests and more produce and beautiful flowers in your landscape.

Start by selecting healthy plants free of insect and disease problems.

There’s no need to spend money on problems. And keep in mind that bigger is not always better. Instead look for compact plants with sturdy stems. The leaves should be deep green or the proper color for that variety. Avoid plants that show signs of stress such as spots, brown leaf edges, and holes. And when all things are equal, purchase the perennials with multiple stems.

Keep your purchase properly watered before and after planting.

Check transplants daily and twice a day when temperatures rise, watering as needed. Increase success and reduce the stress transplants often face. Apply a plant strengthener such as JAZ Spray to protect potted plants from drying out until you are able to plant. Or apply to transplants to get your plants off to a vigorous start. These organic products are not fertilizers but rather naturally occurring molecules that work like an immunization to help new and established plants better tolerate heat, drought, insects, disease, and other challenges plants face.

Prepare the soil before planting.

Though not glamorous building a good foundation for your garden will pay off this season and beyond. Dig one or two inches of compost, peat moss or other organic matter and a low nitrogen slow release fertilizer into the top 12 inches of the soil.

Now slide, don’t pull, the plants out of their containers to avoid damaging their roots and stems.

If they resist, gently squeeze small flexible pots or roll larger pots on their sides over the ground. This loosens the roots, releasing the pot from the container.

Gently tease any roots that encircle (girdle) the root ball.

Or use a knife to slice through girdling roots or the tangled mass that often develops at the bottom of the pot. This encourages the roots to explore the soil beyond the planting hole. And a bigger root system means healthier plants that are more productive and beautiful.

Set your plants at the same depth they were growing in their container.

Tall leggy tomatoes are the exception. These can be planted deeper or in shallow trenches to encourage roots to form along the buried stem. Cover the roots with soil and gently tamp to insure good root to soil contact. Water new plantings thoroughly; moistening the root ball, planting hole, and beyond. Spread a thin layer of shredded leaves, evergreen needles or other mulch over the soil to conserve moisture, suppress weeds, and keep the roots cooler when hot weather moves in for the summer.

Check new plantings every other day and water thoroughly and often enough to keep the soil slightly moist.

Gradually reduce the frequency until your plants only need to be watered once a week in heavy clay soils and twice a week in sandy soils. Of course you’ll need to water more often in hot weather.

And don’t forget about the rest of your landscape.

Plant strengtheners can be applied to established plants to prepare them for the often stressful season ahead. Treated plants will be better able to tolerate heat and drought as well as attacks from insects and diseases.

So get out and start planting to make this the best gardening season yet.

Updated from May 16, 2012 on 5/26/16 ~ VN Editors.

How to Survive Menopause Without Becoming a Felon: Intro
Healthy Living
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My initial title was How to survive menopause with-out going to jail, but that seemed short sighted. A snarky remark to a policeman pulling you over for no apparent reason may result in a visit to jail. A shove back to an aggressive shopper may bring store or mall security and it is only protocol that everyone gets hauled into jail to sort things out. A shove forward to get your comments heard by your political favorite might be misunderstood and it is a ride to jail.Menopause

Becoming a felon means you have really stepped over the line. You have acted out regrettably in a way that can not be sorted out easily. You have become irrational. You have listened to your inner estrogen deprived voice and snapped. You may be reading this too late. For those of us clinging to our rational though estrogen deprived sanity, I write these words of advice. Full disclosure, my advice is from the point of view of someone who can not offset her menopause symptoms by hormones natural or otherwise.

Most women over the course of several years go through a phase called ‘peri-menopause’. This means little side effects are happening. Most women think something critical is wrong with them or it is stress. In reality more often than not, it is the start of menopause. Denial is one of the first side effects of menopause or peri-menopause. I liken the denial phase to the river The Nile. The banks are very lush, the water is very cool the area is very beautiful and if you could just live there in la-la land of denial, everyone and everything would be great!Menopause

menopauseSooner or later, the denial phase does not make sense anymore. Maybe a friend, a spouse or co-worker mentions more than once that you are not quite yourself. Maybe you even have a self reflective non-denial thought and think that you are not yourself either. You start to wonder where the hell did you go and who has taken over your body and mind?

There are many wonderful web sites, books and resources available to find out everything about menopause. From the medical to the spiritual to the alternative to the myths, there is information out there. I am going to share in the following weekly posts the most important information and that is how to survive menopause with-out becoming a felon.  The biggest tip I can give overall is that your inner voice, that voice of rational reason may be compromised because of lack of estrogen, and you need to really truly absolutely positively think and think again before you act, lest you become a felon!

Everyone is welcome to share!

See Also: How to Survive Menopause with-out becoming a Felon: Fashion

VN Editors
Tips for Gorgeous Hair Before and After You Dye Your Grey Hair at Home
Fashion & Beauty
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Tips for Gorgeous Hair Before and After You Dye Your Grey Hair at Home

Coloring grey hair at home is a great way to save money, but the art of using hair dye doesn’t come easy. Learn a few tips that will help you avoid home hair dyeing disasters that leave your locks looking dull, dry…or even an unpleasant shade of green.

Tips for successful grey hair dye treatments

Before coloring grey hair at home, you’ve got to be careful about what kind of hair dye you use, the color shade you pick (remember, Beige is NOT a hair color!) and how you apply it to your head. If you’ve used home dye kits before, you may think you’ve got a good grasp of the subject — but coloring grey hair isn’t like coloring hair that’s already got plenty of pigment.

Before You Dye

Start with healthy hair. Make sure your hair is strong and healthy before you dye. You wouldn’t paint a wall without putting primer on first, right? Your hair should be well-moisturized and clean before you apply any grey hair dye.

Dye type. Grey hair dye may not always stick to your locks, and this results in a spotty, uneven look. Permanent hair color is more likely to give your grey hair color an even coverage which helps you avoid two-tone hair. However, a small percentage of women may be allergic to a certain chemical in permanent hair dyes, so use caution. Instead of squeezing grey hair dye directly on your locks, use a coarse-bristled brush to brush it onto your hair. This painting technique will make the dye stick to your hair better so it creates an even, beautiful tone.

Think twice before going blonde. If you’ve never used dye before, coloring grey hair gives you the perfect excuse to try something new and fun — like blonde, maybe. But wearing blonde hair and dyeing it are distinctly different. Blonde is the trickiest color to dye your locks, especially when those locks are grey. Often, grey hair dye in shades of blonde turns your hair ashy, and won’t cover up the grey hair color completely. Your hair may turn slightly orange before it becomes blonde. Leaving the dye on too long can damage hair; not leaving it on long enough can leave you with that orange shade. For best results, have your hair dyed blonde professionally.

After You Dye

Blonde turning green? If you are successful at dyeing your grey hair color blonde, always keep ketchup in the house. Swimming, going out in the sun and other activities can cause your blonde locks to look green. Washing your hair with ketchup will counter-act the green tones, because the natural red soaks up that inappropriate tinting and the acid soaks up the chemicals that are causing it. Leave the ketchup on your hair for up to 30 minutes, then rinse it out thoroughly.

Hair an ugly shade of dull? If your color starts to look dull and flat, try shocking it with very cold water. The cold water helps bring out your natural shine. Hair toners can also make your locks look shinier.

In-between touch-ups. The problems with grey hair dye is that you’ve always got to use it to keep your color looking fresh and your roots well-covered. But excessive use of grey hair dye will lead to dryness that can cause breakage and damage to your hair. Put off the grey hair treatment awhile longer with a simple touch-up trick. You could use a product like Art Naturals® Root Cover Up or Greyfree Instant Hair Color Touch Up, but in a pinch, here’s a great tip: Brush a little eyeshadow (in a shade that matches your dyed hair) along the line of your hair part and around your face where visible grey roots might be showing. The make-up will help camouflage your grey a little longer.

VN Editors
Before and after: 3 short hair styles that take years off your look
Fashion & Beauty
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“As women age, the more beautiful they become–but often, the less attractive they feel. Who they are isn’t coming across in how they look. And so, they feel invisible.”
~ Christopher Hopkins, “The Makeover Guy”

If, like many other women over 50, you feel your hair isn’t quite expressing your best, most vibrant self, take a look at three makeovers from VN featured contributor Christopher Hopkins, aka The Makeover Guy—and be inspired by the difference the right short hairstyle can make!


Rici - Age 63

“Rici’s ‘before’ look evoked granny in the rocking chair with the knitting— but that image simply didn’t match the Rici I met. With a great hairstyle and highlights, shaped brows, and yes, makeup—we see the true Rici, a woman who wants more from life, who wants to live.”

Nancy - Age 53

“There was nothing wrong with Nancy’s ‘before’ look—but, as I suggested, she might want to save it till she’s 70. Much of Nancy’s transformation had to do with simply getting rid of her grey and going for a cut that truly suits her. Short, blond and bangs all promote a youthful look. The spirit of who Nancy really is radiates in her ‘after’ photo.”

Linda - Age 54

“Linda’s ‘before’ look was classic to the point of failure. Her hair and clothes were shapeless, her makeup colorless, her work bag completely lacking style. Did someone say “schoolmarm”? Her ‘after’ look is still classic, but it lets Linda’s vibrant personality shine through.”

Want more makeover photos? Download Vibrant Nation’s report, Hip, Short Hair After 50: When to cut and how to do it right.

Updated from August, 2012

VN members
Tricks for Applying Mineral Makeup – Advice for and by women 45+
Fashion & Beauty
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~ udpated 11/23/15 – VN Editors

Despite some experts insistence that mineral makeup is simply the best for older women, some Vibrant Nation members have tried and didn’t like the result of using the powdery foundation.

For example, susanpariseau said, ” I tried two different mineral makeups BareMinerals and Raw Minerals and wasn’t happy with either. I have fine lines on my face especially around my mouth, unsure if from smoking or just in my chemistry but the makeup highlighted every line it was horrible. I just use a bronzing lotion and go natural now.

TXButterfly had a similar experience after buying a starter kit of Bare Minerals. “…I feel like it settles into the lines on my face and makes me look dried up and wrinkly,” she said. “Am I applying too much? To tell you the truth, I’m cosmetic-impaired: somehow I just never learned to use foundation, and I’ve never been able to do it in a way that looks natural to me and not ‘made up.'”

TXButterfly may have hit upon the problem, because many VN members have talked about the trick to mineral makeup being its unique application. In other words, it’s not only important what brand of mineral makeup you use, but that you know the tricks and tips for applying mineral makeup.

Tips and tricks for applying mineral makeup

The following are makeup tips and tricks for using mineral makeup provided by Vibrant Nation members:

Sue6 provided several pointers for creating a smooth and even finish when using mineral makeup:

Start with a moisturized but dry face – Give yourself a minute to allow your moisturizer to dry before applying your mineral powder.

Swirl, tap, and buff – Put a bit of powder in the jar lid and swirl your brush into the minerals. Go around the lid three times with the Buki brush to pick up the product. Next, tap your Buki brush two times to release excess powder. Then, buff it onto your face. Start with a thin layer and add layers as needed. Remember to brush in a downward direction on the sides of the face to avoid fluffing up the small hairs on the cheeks.

Use a Buki brush (also called a Kabuki brush) – Sue6 emphasized that it’s vital to use the right type of brush to get a flawless finish with mineral makeup. “…It’s worth investing in a good buki brush,” she advises. “A buki brush is a soft dome shaped brush that is especially effective at applying mineral powder and buffing the product onto the skin. It is designed specifically to apply the product evenly around the nose, mouth and eyes.”

Find the right shade for your skin – Remember that mineral powders reflect light, so you’ll want to choose a color that’s a shade or two darker than your usual liquid foundation. “If your foundation looks powdery after you’ve applied it, wait five or ten minutes and check again,” Sue6 advises. “The minerals meld with the oils of the skin and look natural in a short time. If they continue to look powdery your shade is too light” and you should consider switching to the next darker shade.

VN member SIZZELN agrees that finding the right color is key to a beautiful finish, and you may need more than one shade depending on the season. “…My person who mixes for me, I need two shades. One for winter (lighter) and one for summer (darker), brown skin American. In between seasons blend the two going darker or lighter with season.”

Don’t use too much mineral powder – Mineral makeup is intended to be applied in layers, Sue6 advises. “Start with one light layer and see if the coverage is what you want, if not apply additional layers till you reach the glow that simply can’t be duplicated by other types of makeup.”

Stay hydrated – Some members have complained that mineral makeup makes them look dry. Anna Carlson says, ” I love Bare Minerals – I use a face serum underneath, then apply. That might help with the dryness.”

Where’s the best place to buy mineral makeup

If you’re ready to buy mineral makeup, Vibrant Nation members have also provided some tips for finding the best deals on the sometimes-expensive cosmetics:

    Cobrateacher says,
    “I love the quality and especially the priced at ELF (Eyes, Lips, Face) Most of their products are only $1 each, and the mineral products are usually $5. I’ve often gotten free shipping or discounts, too. I wouldn’t bother if the quality weren’t truly wonderful!”
    Pamela4 says,
    “I buy my favorite makeup brands on e-bay. E-bay sellers can only sell new makeup so everything is new. …I love Jane Airdale Mineral Makeup and I get it on e-bay. Recently, I spotted a Bobbi Brown “Summer Nudes” eyeshadow tray that included 8 shadows at Macy’s but it was $64. Not happening. I got it on e-bay for $34.99.”
    dbeth52 says,
    “I buy my BareMinerals make-up from Sephora, QVC, or BareMinerals site. Whichever has the best deal. Over the years, I have tried lots….drugstore brands, Avon, Arbonne, MaryKay, etc., but BareMinerals works the very best for me. No breakouts, no T-zone shine after a few hours like with all others, and my face looks and feels great.”
    rkaster says,
    “absolutely the best I have used. Mineral Foundations. Beautiful, face, eyes, nail colors. Great anti-aging skin care too! Even have tips on this site.. check it out!!”
VN Editors
What to wear to make your grey hair color fashionable
Fashion & Beauty
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Following the grey hair color trend won’t instantly make you look modern, especially if you aren’t flattering your new color with the clothes you wear. Grey hair color is striking and it’s definitely in style, but the clothes you wear will make or break your overall look. When you know what colors to wear with your grey hair, you’ll always look fashionable.

Grey hair coloring affects everything

When you go from colored to grey hair, color in your face and clothing will look different. The make-up you use and the outfits you frequently wear won’t look the same, and may not suit you quite as well. Grey hair color will affect everything else you’re wearing, and make your overall skin tone look different. Keep your look fashionable, and make your grey hair shine, through fashionable wardrobe choices.

Red is grey’s best friend. The two colors naturally work together to create beautiful contrast. From bold ruby red to deep crimson, red goes beautifully with grey hair color. If you don’t want to wear red all over, pair it with nude and neutral shades. Light tans and nudes echo the warmth of the red, but help to tone down the brightness of the color. When coupled with grey hair color, nude and red look modern, powerful and very fashionable. Add grey, blue and black accessories and accents to pull the entire look together with your grey hair. Color is one of the most important elements of fashion, and if you can use it well you’ll create a complete look that always works.

If you can’t afford to buy a whole new wardrobe (who can?), get some red accents and accessories. Place a red scarf around your neck; this will set off your hair and immediately warm up your skin tone. Use red earrings and/or a red necklace to contrast beautifully against your hair. Summer’s a perfect excuse to break out the bold red sunglasses, and instantly turn the temperature up on your look for a bargain price. If your natural skin tone is cool and pale, look for reds with cooler blue undertones to them. Women with warmer skin tones should seek out brownish and yellowish reds that will suit their coloring.

Expand your color palette by creating a basic wardrobe in white and black. These colors will contrast gorgeously against grey hair color, and give you plenty of room to play with any colors you like. Use accent pieces, like belts and shoes, to show off bold pops of color. Purples look great with grey in just about any shade, from rich berry purple to light lavender. Bold jewel tones are always a good choice to make grey hair color stand out; the bolder colors immediately pull out those silvery tones in grey. Greens and yellows may makes your grey hair color look greenish or yellowy in tone, particularly in sunlight, so you might want to stray away from filling your wardrobe with these shades.


VN members
Best makeup over 50: Mineral makeup we love
Fashion & Beauty
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The following post contains affiliate links

Why is mineral makeup great for women over 50?

Susan Posnick, who has her own line of makeup, says that mineral makeup is the best for women over 50 for several reasons.

First, mineral makeup allows your skin to breathe. Traditional foundation and powder “blocks the skin so that it can’t breathe,” Posnick explained. “And especially today, many of the liquid foundations use silicone which makes for a beautiful liquid foundation, but doesn’t let the skin breathe in the same way.”

Secondly, mineral makeup has light-diffusing properties that help soften the appearance of lines and wrinkles. And finally, minerals don’t settle into lines and wrinkles the way traditional liquid foundations and powders might. “…What you see is that the powder settles into fine lines and can make the skin look dry. And as we age, those lines of character can become a little stronger, a little more obvious–you don’t want your makeup settling in,” Posnick said.

Certainly, mineral makeup has gained popularity in the last few years. As member Jeannie Smith said, “There are so many out there. I started with Bare Minerals and am now with Smashbox because it seems less drying.”

Riaholz agreed, saying, “I know how hard it can be to find a mineral makeup that works for you. I had tried many, and was about to give up when I found a brand called 24-7. I found it at CVS and decided to give it a try. It is reasonably priced and at least on my skin goes on beautifully. Of course the problem with this is you can’t try samples because it is the drugstore. The store assured me I could bring back anything with my receipt that did not work.”

Mineral makeup products most recommended by women over 50

What follows are some recommendations for mineral makeup from Vibrant Nation members – women over 50 who’ve tried the mineral makeup trend and reported back on what helps them look their best day to day.

VN member Lois Joy Johnson is a writer and author and a leading expert on the looks and lifestyles of women 50 +. Former Beauty and Fashion Director of MORE magazine, her The Makeup Wakeup has guided many members to try new things with their beauty routines. She has two favorites when it comes to mineral makeup:

La Bella Donna Compressed Mineral Foundation

“It’s more expensive than most mineral foundations, but this soothing pressed powder is amazing for covering blemished skin,” Johnson said. “The bonus is you won’t end up with a cakey, flaky look. It can be applied dry or with a damp sponge and works well for rosacea and blotchy or sun-damaged skin. You can even use this base over tinted moisturizer for a hint more coverage or to mask flushed areas.”

Bare Escentuals BareMinerals SPF 15 Foundation

If you don’t like the feeling liquid makeups and creams leave, but want subtle coverage and sun protection, Johnson suggests this loose mineral powder that buffs on fast. “It leaves your skin feeling naked, and the original formula (not the newer matte one) gives a radiant look to dry skin—hard to believe powder does this until you try it,” she promises. “There are no parabens, sulfates, synthetic dyes or fragrances, petro chemicals, talc, oil, waxes, or preservatives to think about either.

damselfly09 says
I don’t often sing the praises of any makeup because I’m 63 and when it comes to wrinkles, I’ve got my share. They are more like gutters than wrinkles. They come from spending years in the sun and tanning bed and not properly caring for my skin.

Well, the same beautiful daughter-in-law who turned me on to the “Soothing Care” by Monistat [as a primer for the face], also turned me on to the best mineral makeup I have ever used in my entire life. The Signature Minerals are the softest, smoothest minerals I have ever used. I also have never seen another mineral makeup that completely covered everything including shadow, concealer, and all in mineral form. Everything I need to do my face except my mascara is made by Signature Minerals and is in one little pouch. It has never been easier than it is now to look great.

Mineral makeup is the best thing for older skin as it makes your skin look smooth and flawless. I cannot tell I have this mineral makeup on my skin but it makes my skin look smooth and youthful. I always get compliments about how I don’t look like I’m 63 years old.

The best part about these minerals is that they give away free samples at their website. I love getting “free” samples anytime! That is the base coat, eye shadow, concealer, blush and all. The samples they give away of the foundation powder are not small samples either. You just pick your colors. You can get your samples of Signature Minerals at

Pamela4 says
I use Jane Iredale and it is the best I have found. I get a lot of compliments when I wear it. I use the makeup and the bronzer together.

Mo Brock says
Ditto on the Motives by Loren Ridinger. The Liquid Powder Mineral Foundation is the absolute best!! Try it; I think you’ll like it. I’m not a cosmetics guru … but finding this foundation has made me a believer.

Cheryl Bowman says
My favorite is Mary Kay Mineral Makeup. Great deal for the money, feels fantastically light! easy to match color! Great brush you can take with you for touchups if you like!

MySunnyFlorida says
I love Bare Minerals – using the Skin Rever Upper 1st takes care of any dryness!

carolyne49 says
Jane Iredale. I am a beauty professional and love this line. Jane has rosacea and that is why she started her own makeup. Look into this line. It is not drying and does not settle in the creases.

FancyFrancie says
I’ve used Bare Minerals for at least ten years; have turned others onto it; I love it. Occasionally have tried others, but none compare, in my book. If you use a moisturizer, dryness shouldn’t be an issue.

birdiebabe says
Arbonne’s mineral powder gives a flawless-looking finish with realistic coverage. The formula contains minerals and pigments that are blended into a light reflecting powder. Provides sun protection – SPF 15 – available in 15 shades. Totally love it!!

VintageIsVogue says
I LOVE Bare Minerals. They were one of the first – the original – and they are simply the best. I’ve tried other brands to save [money], but I’d rather purchase Bare Minerals – and know I always look my best. Ulta 3 usually carries gift sets for about $60 which should last several months depending on how often you apply your makeup. Like any good makeup application – make sure you moisturize (and tone if necessary for us oily gals).

Susan Lide says
I use Lauren Hutton Mineral Make up. It’s great for my skin as it has moisturizers in it and does not irritate my skin. There are also other products in this line that I use – she specializes in products for our demographic group.

Anonymous says
I use Bare Minerals Foundation with SPF 15. It is a loose powder you apply with a brush and you control the amount you apply. I apply it very lightly and it covers fine lines, pores, and evens skin tone. It buffs beautifully and is light and looks very natural. I think it is lighter than liquid foundation and I will never go back to liquid again.

grammayumyum says
LOVED Bare Minerals, especially their Mineral Veil that makes your face just glow. I found them to be a bit expensive, and have supplemented with over the counter Physician’s Formula mineral makeup, but nothing compares to the quality of Bare Minerals. I sound like an ad, and I never could be a salesperson, but this stuff sells itself.

Be sure to start with a good moisturizer, and, yes, apply lightly. Their ads show how much the brushes have to be tapped free of excess minerals before applying to your face.

For more great tips and tricks for applying mineral makeup,
see Best Makeup Over 50: Tips and tricks for applying mineral makeup

Susan Posnick
6 age-defying makeup tips for women over 50
Fashion & Beauty
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  1. Use highlighting color to lift and brighten.
    Next to sun protection, a highlighting color can be the most valuable tool in your makeup wardrobe. As we age, gravity makes things fall. Careful use of highlighting color can counter the appearance of this:

    • Brow: Use a little bit of highlighting color just underneath the brow and a little bit above the brow to lift, open, and brighten the eye.
    • Cheeks: Use the same highlighter at the top of your cheekbone to make it more prominent. Again, it’s a lift up.
    • Mouth: Use the highlighter around your mouth where those little lines sometimes settle in. Just sort of outline the mouth to make it look a bit fuller. This also softens the lines around the mouth.
  • Open your eyes.
    I think women over 50 should always use some eyeliner. Apply it above the top lashes and don’t go too thick; it can be a very thin line and then you can smudge it out a little bit by the eye. Keep the eyelid lighter in color rather than darker in color because it will keep the eye looking open. Choose an eyeliner color that flatters your coloring–something that defines the eye but isn’t too hard. Black is good, but sapphire blue can be beautiful, or coppery brown, or a deep purple.


  • Go easy on the lip liner.
    Definite lip liner was popular about 20 years ago. Today, too much lip liner has a dated, aging effect. If you’re going to wear a lip liner, wear a very neutral color just to cheat the lip line a little bit.


  • Enhance your lip color.
    You want nice, moist, pretty lips–but with some color. I think glosses are great, but I think once you’re over 50, put a little color with that gloss.


  • Don’t be afraid of a little eye shimmer.
    Many women over 50 are very afraid of eye shadows that have shimmer in them. 20 years ago, you needed to be afraid because the particles were so big that they made the eyelid look crepe-y. But today, everything is so refined you don’t have to be afraid of a little shimmer. This is a big change.




  • Flatter your neck and jawline.
    There are things you can do to flatter these areas which can be a problem for some women. For example, under the chin and onto the neck you can apply a little bit of contouring color (two or three shades deeper than your foundation color) to shadow it back a little bit. Another trick is to apply highlighting color above the jaw line and below the bottom of the cheek, to lift the face.


Finally, learning these tricks is easier when you’re shown how to do them. If you go to a department store, approach someone whose look you like and who is age-appropriate. But you may get better attention at a smaller apothecary because in an apothecary they are not selling a specific line–they are selling what works best for you.


The Makeover Guy
8 lessons from 8 makeovers of women over 50
Fashion & Beauty
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As women age, the more beautiful they become–but often, the less attractive they feel. Who they are isn’t coming across in how they look. And so, they feel invisible.

I wrote a makeover book for women over 45 because I like them. We “get” each other. Younger women tend to gravitate towards the trendy and trivial whereas women who’ve sort of “been there, done that,” like I have, are impatient with hype. My clients are smart and they’re ready to hear it. I wrote my book, Staging Your Comeback: A Complete Beauty Revival for Women Over 45, as a labor of love–focusing on techniques I’ve used for over 20 years in my professional career, and addressing the specific challenges women face as they grow older and as their bodies change.

Here are some of the lessons women 50+ can learn from makeovers in my book:

1. Growing old is optional

Rici is the perfect illustration of what happens when you do next to nothing because “it’s just too much work.” Looking natural does not mean doing nothing, especially after 60! It takes makeup to look naturally attractive.

Rici’s “before” look evoked granny in the rocking chair with the knitting–but that image simply didn’t match the Rici I met. With a great hairstyle and highlights, shaped brows, and yes, makeup–we see the true Rici, a woman who wants more from life, who wants to live.

2. Your hair speaks volumes

Nancy has a great personality that her “before” look didn’t come close to capturing. Technically, there was nothing wrong with Nancy’s look–but, as I suggested, she might want to save it till she’s 70.

Much of Nancy’s transformation had to do with simply getting rid of her grey and going for a cut that truly suits her. Short, blond, and bangs all promote a youthful look. The spirit of who Nancy really is radiates in her “after” photo, and that’s what any makeover is all about.

3. Classic doesn’t have to mean boring

Linda’s “before” look was classic to the point of failure. Her hair and clothes were shapeless, her makeup colorless, her workbag completely lacking style. Did someone say “schoolmarm”?

Her “after” look is still classic, but it lets Linda’s vibrant personality shine through. To me there is nothing sexier than a woman in a straight black skirt, a beautiful silk blouse opened one extra button with a killer pair of heels. Plus, the matching hem, hose, and heel work together to elongate her legs. Bam!

4. Give yourself a liftBy age 40, about 40% of women have experienced some hair loss, and the hair loss accelerates during menopause. The right haircut and styling can make a big difference.

For example, Carol thought she needed shorter layers on top for height. In truth, she needed color for texture and more length on top for support. Take control: Give yourself some lift and keep it there by back-combing and using a fine mist hairspray, preferably aerosol.

5. Dress the woman you are today

As you try to find the balance between growing older and looking modern, don’t fall into the trap of becoming “mutton dressed as lamb.” You won’t look younger, you’ll simply look vulnerable and insecure.

Cheryl’s transformation shows the importance of dressing age-appropriately. Rather than tell a story about our past, our image must declare the person we’ve become. In her “after” photo, Cheryl shows just a hint of cleavage (all that’s needed!) and her skirt length, just below the knee, is flattering as well as sexy.

6. Build a foundation

Maybe in the 1960’s and ’70s you burned your bra and let it all hang out, but as time passes, the spirit may still be willing, but the flesh does become weak. It’s time to recognize that the single, most important garment you can wear under slim-fitting clothing is the appropriate foundation.

Lynette’s makeover shows how the right shapewear smooths, slims, and firms. Also, choosing an outfit that creates a monochromatic line slenderizes and balances.

7. Minimize

Lynda told me she hadn’t really “gone out” since the 1980’s because she’d been self-conscious about her weight. But after weight-loss surgery, she lost 155 pounds. And although I thought Lynda was beautiful, she couldn’t seem to see it.

In Lynda’s makeover, warm colors brighten her face while monochromatic color blocking is slenderizing. The lapels draw the eye up and out, away from her midsection. The V-neck elongates, and the necklace draws the eye to Lynda’s face. Finally, fuller leg pants help balance a bigger top.

8. Keep it current

Gail started out with home hair color from hell and a dated hairstyle, plus dark makeup that was aging–and a little scary. Part of the problem was that Gail had spent her life spending money on her children’s clothing, makeup, and haircuts–but had trouble feeling that she deserved those things for herself.

Gail’s makeover stayed true to her beauty buzzwords–simple, clean, and natural–but the softer hair and makeup are much more feminine and the trapeze silhouette works well for her A-shape body.

Why do I feel so lonely all the time even when I’m with my family or friends, no matter what I do or where I’m at.
Family & Relationships
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i feel so lonely all the time, i don’t know why.. i am so blessed, i have a beautiful family, they are healthy, i have a home,car, food everything i need, i just feel so lonely.


VN Editors
Best makeup over 50: Lipsticks we love
Fashion & Beauty
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The following post contains affiliate links
When you’ve reached the expiration date on your lipstick, or you’re just looking for a new brand to try, your choices are almost overwhelming. Lucky for you, Vibrant Nation members are ready with lots of recommendations for the best lipstick shades and brands available, especially for mature women with lips that may need a little extra definition or plumping.

Since dark lip liner and oozy liquid lipsticks and dark gloppy glosses are on our list of 10 taboo beauty items, you’ll want to find a paler shade that gives you a youthful look while keep your lips moist and healthy. Consider these recommendations for the best lipsticks for women over 50 from the members of VN:

VN member Paula Ellen

I like using Blistex Silk & Shine under any lipstick I use. It makes your lips very moist and pretty, and I think it makes the lipstick look better, and last longer since you use less. Plus, the Blistex smells and tastes GREAT!

That said, I use Wet ‘n’ Wild #911B in summer and #912B in winter. It looks ridiculously pink, and I have to admit it was a leap of faith for me. I am not a fan of pink but for some reason it looks good on me. Go figure. The universe loves to play these sorts of jokes on me. Wearing anything darker just makes me look like a clown, so I have stayed with this shade.

Marla Heller
I love Elizabeth Arden 8 hr tinted lip balm. It is absolutely the best. And you can get it untinted for bedtime use. Every other lipstick makes my lips peel.

I use Burt’s Bees tinted lip balm. Love it!

Found a great color lipstick today by Elizabeth Arden called Breathless…it is more a neutral color of rose, love it! Has no shimmer, more a creamy matte, but beautiful on!

Chanel Rouge Coco Ultra Hydrating Lip Colour which I have loved for over 25 years… I like it because it’s so creamy and feels good on my lips for hours.  It’s almost like a balm.  I even wear it around the house rather than a balm.

I cannot afford to have botox every 3-6 months so I tried several lip plumping products.  I started out with the more expensive department store options.  Slowly I tried less expensive products.  Now I use, are you ready for this?, Sally Hanson Lip Inflation.  I absolutely LOVE it. It comes in colors and in clear.  I love the glossy look it adds and I find it plumps ever bit as much as those expensive brands.  Who would have guessed?  I usually buy it at Walgreen’s.  It sells for about $6.

Shelby Jean Etheredge
I use Sunright lip balm SPF 15 from Nuskin.  They also have lipstick.

Sharon Lee 123
I have switched to pencils entirely. They don’t bleed and there are many colors. They seem to last a long time on the lips. I find them easy to apply too! … My favorite [lip pencil] is by Almay because its glides on easily and seems to last a long time (but not through a meal). However, I’ve tried all the brands from expensive to cheap and they are work best for me. And so many colors! The ones in pencil-like tubes are softer and easier to apply. Sometimes I put a dab of lotion on my lips and let it dry thoroughly and that seems to help it “set.”

From Sarah Swenson (Seawriter)
My favorite lipstick right now is Dior Addict. (doesn’t that sound HORRIBLE?)

I use color #583 which is a beautiful shimmery pink that blends perfectly with my coloring. (I have very fair skin, green eyes and blond hair).

I like it because the color lasts, it stays smooth and not bumpy or chunky, and the color is so pretty.

I used to swear only by Chanel lipsticks, which I still like, but this Dior Addict has trumped Chanel, at least for the time being.

Jane Edenfield
So far I am impressed with Mary Kay and M.A.C.

I line my lips and wear mostly colored gloss. I am now using the Sally Hansen plump gloss. Suggested by someone here.

Jackie Brown
My new favorite lip color/gloss is a by brand called “Ruby Kisses” which I discovered at the beauty supply store. I wouldn’t say I can’t live without it, but the colors are lovely and the gloss long-lasting and moisturizing. Best of all, it’s only $2.99 for a palette of three coordinated shades and a clear gloss.

I’m not sure..i haven’t had much luck with drugstore brands OR department store brands.  I just ordered a Paul and Joe lipstick that i saw in a magazine and loved the color… Loved it!!  Stays put, color is great!!  Paul and Joe Limited Edition RPM (beige-pink)  Costs a lot but it’s worth it to find a good one!

Another great lipstick – Laura Geller.  Feels great, lasts a long time, great colors, but cost a lot.  I buy it off her website or $15.50/tube.

I have been using Cover Girl Outlast Lipstick since 2000. It is wonderful. I put it on in the morning, eat, drink, sleep, get up the next morning, take it off with my moisturizer and put on fresh for the next day. I have been asked many times, “How do you wake up in the morning and still have on lipstick?” I can kiss my grandkids and they know it won’t be on them. Never leave marks on your coffee cup, your hubby. It is great!!! It comes in a box, has the lipstick in a long slender tube, then a moisturizer you HAVE to put on after a minute. That is what makes it stay on.

Carol Orsborn
Revlon Just Bitten Lipstain and Balm by Revlon. (My shade: “Forbidden.”)

bubbyof5 provided a few tips to “keep lip color on for hours longer than usual.” She recommends:

1. Exfoliate your lips weekly.

2. Use lip liner pencil all over the lips.

3. Apply lipstick with a brush, especially first time in the day.

4. Powder lips (even blush will work).

5. Blot with tissue between lips.

6. Reapply lipstick or gloss.


Are dry lips your problem? Check out these best lip balms to protect and hydrate your lips recommended by members of VN.

Did your favorite lipstick make the list? Recommend it below!

I have a crush on my boss do you think he’s attracted to me?
Love & Sex
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I work in a retail store and my (male) boss is such a sweetie. Some how our eyes always meet lots of staring.. and I caught him looking at me he smiled and raised both of his eyebrows..He just gave me a bunch of nice compliments he told me I was a good woman a savvy shopper and a sweet girl I melted I could not believe it because he is so amazing and so cute he dress nice such a beautiful man!  I have another problem though women there treat me nasty including the female boss I am a pretty woman i keep my hair nice and my nails done i am in my 40’s but look like i’m in my 20’s so this chick is nasty. what do you guys think?

He isn’t interested in sex, intimacy, hugging, or affection. Why does he say he loves me?
Love & Sex
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I’m smart, I give GREAT advice and wisdom; but I don’t listen to my own advice!  I’ve been married and divorced twice.  Now, I’ve been in a relationship for nearly 7 years, and he is not interested in sex.  Not that important to him, he says.  We go days with out kissing or hugging.  If I don’t initiate affection, we’d go weeks!  Good man, good provider, works hard, and we have a beautiful home!  I could go on.  And, I love him.  I’m a very young 53 year old, and he’s 50!  We still have a lot of years in us; and I want to have SEX!!!  Yes.  I’ve told him.