Hi there,
I have to tell you I am sad today. I find myself surrounded by a few people that have proven themselves to be two faced on several occasions. It troubles me and it usually involves me. It seems that while I am away I am the topic of conversation and not in a good way, and then there are consequences…I am spoken to about whatever the few have decided are my supposed transgressions and then later those same people are all very friendly and trying to strike up conversations with me. Usually I allow it, because after all, to do otherwise would make for a pretty nasty atmosphere you know?? I have to say however, that I am weary of this. It is not of, course that I might not be able to improve myself. It is rather that I really don’t think that the “golden girls” as I have dubbed them, really are all that and a bag of chips, and I really don’t know if I have it in me to be all that mature about it any more…I mean if they can be all middle school about it, than why can’t I?
I’ll tell you why…the thought of behaving in that manner turns my skin cold. I am so much better than that, So much more. I have been through much in my life. If all it takes is to use a computer within sight of the golden girls so that they may see that I am indeed working and not goofing off than so be it. However, I do not have to pretend to be friends with them or to be involved on a personal level. I will be my usual pleasant and funny self, but only on the surface…Will they even notice, I wonder? Somehow I think not!
Stay Pink
other blog entries from »
You can’t change other people, they are the only ones who can.
Be true to yourself is the only thing you can do. If you act in a way that is not in your nature, you might end up not liking who you are.
Been there. Tried that. Felt terrible afterwards. Returned to who I am and not trying to be someone I wasn’t.
anir
Yes, I know you are right…I just keep hanging in there…I just get discouraged sometimes…I always feel better after a good nights sleep and a few days out from the incident…
Pinkim
My dear girl — why bother?? Sounds like a lotta hard work to me. They are more than two-faced — mean, arrogant, ignorant, vicious, angry, spoiled, dishonest are just a few words that one might use. We must try very hard to trust our own feelings about ourselves — theirs is but an opinion and you know what they say about that!!! When you have had enough — I know you will do something about it — even if it’s just walking away for good.
Maggie you seem to have both of them pegged to a tee…amazing! Thank you for the sage advice. I need to remind myself that they are but co workers and remember that they are not my friends. Friends wouldn’t do things like that behind my back…If I keep that in mind perhaps next time the hurt will be a little less…Since I need the job and have been there a long time, I don’t think that the answer is to literally walk away from the job, but perhaps mentally I shall walk away from them.
Thanks and Stay Pink
I love the comparison to middle school…Remember those days? Truthfully, lots of grown up women are still middle schoolers in a mature body. In Jewish we call women like this Yentas!! My advice…Be true to yourself. If being friends with these women is very important to you…you will probably have to accept the fact that they talk about you behind your back. I’m thinking it might be time to make some new girlfriends…which at our stage of life should be FUN! Sounds like you and the “golden girls” might be heading in different directions..
Unfortunately they are co workers and I guess not really friends… and so even if I do not wish to be friends I have to be at least civil acquaintances… so that is what Yentas are…lol Now I have a definition…I think you are right and the best way to go is to be true to myself…Today started out pretty quiet for me but I came out of it and warmed up. I really think that I just need to keep in mind that they are not my friends so that when these things happen, as they inevitably do…I won’t be so hurt…
Thanks, and Stay Pink
they are not my friends
You’re right! They are not your friends, they are your coworkers. Whenever I meet someone who gossips I end up looking at the person doing the gossiping, not the person they’re gossiping about. If they are gossip about other people than I can bet they are also gossiping about me. Just wondering: Do you gossip?
Not really, I do listen, it is hard not to, but I very rarely pass anything on…I don’t like to do that I like to follow the live and let live motto…and what you say is true, if someone is a gossip anyone is fair game, so you have to know they talk about you while you are not in the room.