I went on JDate this morning just to see who was out there for one of my local clients to date. I know from dating off and on for 10 years that it’s pretty common to see the familiar faces of men who’ve been online forever. So I wasn’t surprised when I saw pictures of guys I’d dated over 9 years ago including the one I call “KFC Man.”
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When “KFC Man” and I spoke, he told me, he didn’t care what a woman looked like as long as her body was fit and toned. When he asked what mine was like, I told him my aide wheeled me up to the ‘KFC’ counter every day for my daily dose of fried chicken. I shocked him because for at least a full 30 seconds he said nothing then I finally said, “Just kidding.”
9 years later he was back online – probably because no one could ever meet his stringent physical expectations. This time around, his profile seemed nicer. Maybe he’s finally learned that a woman who has more then just a certain type of body can indeed be both appealing and interesting.
I understand how frustrating online dating can be when all you see are unchanged profiles and the same pictures that were posted years ago. It’s depressing. It makes you want to give up on dating and it makes you feel as though absolutely no one is out there for you.
If this has happened to you, I have a solution for you. It’s called “Out of the Box Dating” and it works! We have a tendency to choose the same dating sites and the same kinds of men over and over again. Men do too and it’s why a lot of people are unsuccessful with online dating.
You can change this pattern and get out of your usual “dating box” by choosing a couple of new dating sites that are entirely different from the ones you’re used to. You may find a small number of men who are repeat’s from your favorite site but for the most part, you should see completely different men on the new site. My website now contains a reference link for numerous dating sites that are worth looking into.
Also do you ever find yourself thinking like the “KFC Man” mentioned at the beginning of this blog? Do you have the same strict expectations of men just to date for fun? If you do, would you consider changing some of the criteria on your ‘Must Have List’ to date a new kind of man?
There are lots of “Quality Men” in your local area you may be missing on a daily basis because they can’t meet your ‘Must Have List.’ Yet one of these men might enrich your life with a quality you might never have realized was important until you met the man who possessed it. Would you be willing to open another door and try a new dating site? Can you let yourself experience a date with a man who’s completely different then anyone you’ve ever dated?
If you’re tired of feeling frustrated and you’re ready to climb out of a dating rut, then go check out this reference page. Also think about varying your ‘Must Have List’ so you can get out there and have fun dating lots of new men. You just might end up meeting that special man you’ve been waiting for but never knew existed until you tried “Out of the Box Dating.” Let me know what you think.
Until next time-
Use my what? where? and the reason is because I "should" have a man. Pray tell at what point does that become pointless? I suggest it is shortly after age 58 when invisibility begins to set in. So I could learn to use my what? when? and for
Hello!
I read each one of the responses before writing and in each one you counter the writer with why you are staying in this situation. When you left, did you think about what kind of life you were going to build for yourself? Because after the ini
I want to meet a man who is kind, has integrity and morals. I have been on-line dating for 7 years. It is icky.
Hi Alicia
I am sorry online dating has been so difficult for you. The wonderful man I’ve been with, I met on Plenty of Fish.
Online Dating is tough. #1, its one dimensional and a lot of snap judgement are made based on pictures. The man I’m with loved my picture. I wasn’t crazy about his but he seemed nice so I gave him a chance. I’m glad I did.
But, I nearly didn’t. The first 3 times we met, I sat there wondering what I was doing on the date. It was flat but he was nice so I kept giving him a chance.
The fourth date, I tried to cancel last minute and he reached out to reel me back in with a lovely note. I met him and suddenly the chemistry opened up and is still there today.
Although a lot of women think they know within 5 minutes whether or not this is the guy, I have to disagree. Give him a chance like I did. If I hadn’t, I’d have missed one of the best relationships I’ve ever been in.
Hugs to you Alicia and good luck!
Lisa