As I have mentioned (ad nauseam, perhaps), I gained some (a lot) of weight while recuperating from breaking both legs last February. No walking + lots of sitting + (okay, plus lots of eating) = whoa! where did all this poundage come from?
But it’s one thing to recognize there’s a problem. Ask anyone in AA: you then have to be willing to do something about it. You have to stop the behavior that created the problem in the first place. Sweet cognitions! This is so easy to say and so difficult to do. Again, ask anyone in AA.
I have made several well-intended but (I now see) half-witted attempts to jump start a weight loss program. I was good for about three days on average, and then I would melt into a puddle of my same old self (and that puddle was getting bigger by the minute).
As I have also mentioned in previous posts, I am a graduate student and psychotherapy intern in a large mental health facility. One of the more troublesome aspects/fruitful aspects of being a student is being observed by your clinical supervisor, practicum professor, and fellow students for critique. How is this accomplished? You film yourself with your little Flip
The instant the clip began, I realized that my body filled the entire frame. That massive black-garbed figure whose words fell on my deaf ears because all I could see was bulk — well, that BULK (every bit of it) was mine.
Somewhere along the line, I realized, I had been telling myself I had gained a few pounds. But seeing this image changed that. It’s clear I’ve gained a lot more than that, and even if I account for the camera’s ten-pound addition, there’s plenty more where that came from.
So I’ve had my wake-up call. I want my health. I want my looks. And they are there for the taking. All I have to do is add less fuel (premium, of course) and rev the engine a little more to keep everything running smoothly.
This morning I took the dog for a longer than usual walk. I had a pear and a cup of coffee for breakfast, and recorded this carefully in my Journal of Personal Liberation. Today is the first day of the rest of my life, all right. I will bring to bear the prodigious amount of information that has been lodged in disuse between my ears on the subject of sound nutrition, and I will actually apply it to my life.
Next year at this time I hope to hold my head up high in my practicum seminar and be able to listen to what that kind and thoughtful (and attractive) therapist on the screen is saying to her clients.
That kind and thoughtful — and attractive — therapist will be me.
I look in my mirror with similar results. I think I’ll follow along with you and see if I can get motivated. Thanks for your bravery!
Seawriter, your blog is my favorite, just had to tell you that. Now you are on my list as one of the bravest women I know. It is not easy to take a good long look at ourselves in a full length mirror, let alone a film screen. Good Luck, your determination shines through and you are already an inspiration!
Karent, thank you for your kind words. I think there’s a slippery slope from feeling you’re carrying a “few extra pounds” to being over the line into carrying enough extra weight that it is detrimental to your health. That’s the line I crossed. The price is too high for me to allow myself to say on this side of it any longer. Is that brave? Actually, I feel as if I simply came to my senses. Thanks again for your note. It’s wind under my wings. Best wishes to you, too.
Therapist, Heal Thyself??!! Is it Bob Green and/or Dr. Phil who says that you have to look inside yourself to find out what is eating you? Some deep rooted psychological thing that is making you eat in the first place. I gave up on all of that on Sunday and signed up for Nutrisystem. Good luck with your journal.
You’re absolutely right, btkdiva. But it doesn’t take Dr. Phil to make us to realize that we may have maladaptive relationships with food. We all have our own paths to figure out on this weight question. Over and above that, we all have crosses to bear that are better kept to ourselves, and we need to be kind enough to ourselves to realize that life’s difficulties can affect not only the way we use food but also the way our bodies metabolize what we eat. Add menopause and it’s possible to feel you are inhabiting a body that is reeling out of control before you even realize it. The reins slip out of our hands. But we can find them again. We can regain control of these new bodies and live in harmony.
Best wishes to you on Nutrisystem.
Congratulations seawriter you have made a major decision on your journey to better health. When we are ready to learn the teacher arrives and your teacher arrived as yourself on the screen. The first and hardest step is acknowledging their is a problem which you havedone. There is no magic in loosing weight and living a healthier lifestyle. I speak from experience. A few years ago I wore a size 20 and now I wear a size14. I never told myself that I was on a diet I just told myself and others that I was on a new life plan. I started walking (not vigorously) and reducing my meal portions. I never weighed myself as I could tell it was working as I kept having to get smaller clothes. I still have a sweet tooth and satisfy it every now and then but that is my sometime behavior while my mostime behavior watches portions and stays away from non nutritious food. Congratulations and good luck on your new healthy journey.
rosiemay, congratulations on your ability to go from a 20 to a 14 by shifting your perception about your behavior. I think that’s the ticket for me, too. You pointed out an interesting twist on the statement about the teacher arriving when the student is ready, btw, by saying my own image is my teacher. Thank you for that insight. I’m such a visual person that holding that image is bound to help me re-establish equilibrium in my life.
Ooops, duplicate entry.
my personal trainer says the diet is 90% of the weight loss, exercise if good but it is only 10%. So i have a decision to make have smart lipo or go on vacation to PR for 3 days? Then i will have to maintain which i can do, but CANNOT get rid of this fat the normal way. I take spinning 3 x a week and 1 hour weight training 2 a week. Lost 10 lbs. thats it. Smart lipo it is… or vacation? I can do both but not at the same time, my boss will kill me!
I hear all the realizations… when I moved into an apartment with a huge mirror in a very small bathroom (nowhere to hide) that was my realization! The size 16 never seemed to faze me…. though I am only 5’1″, damn those cute clothes in big sizes!
.Also, my lower back is really begining to scream at the weight it has to carry since I have no abdominal strength… that too is another realization!I take pain meds for my back but really I want the weight off and more abdominal strength. Yes, my cholesteral is high. What am I doing?
I am doing some yoga at home, seriuosly cutting back on foods I know I shouldn’t have in favor of veggies, chicken and fruits. I also am beginning a walking regimine. I need a strength training regimine but I want to sign up with a trainer so I don’t mess my back up more…
All in all I want to be here awhile! I have three grandchildren and two children that I enjoy and am not ready to be an old woman yet! I am 53 age wise but my heart is still 30ish.
LinSanti –I know what you mean about lower back pain, and I think you’re doing the right thing to work with a trainer so you don’t accidentally cause yourself harm. That’s very smart. And yes, with three grandchildren you have plenty to get healthy for. We can do this.
I hear you. I have experienced this all, had a heart attack and stent put in and I STILL have trouble motivating myself to do something about it. Quitting smoking was easier than this…..you can’t quit food! I know, I can make healthier choices, but do I? No.
I look in the mirror and see Manatee Momma, and continue to shovel in the sweets. That is the down fall.
Any suggestions are more than welcome.
Hey! -happened to see your comment re: sweets – try a green drink first thing in the morning, after water & see if it doesn’t start you off right when it comes to the sweet thing.
You go girl! Still struggling at 61. Up and down significant amounts since 35. But I will never give up and don’t you give up. Next year when you are claiming your victory I will be right alongside you.
Tereza, yes, we can do this together! I won’t give up if you won’t!
No video? I weigh myself regularly – it’s easier to keep the lid on 2-3-5 extra pounds than to wake up with 10-15-30 extra. I also refuse to buy clothes one size larger. Never, never buy clothes one size larger. Even if you have the money for it. I had gained weight (5 pounds) last winter when I retired, and I ended up wearing the same 2 pairs of pants all winter. They were the only clothes I fitted in. I lost the weight before summer because I wanted to be able to wear the clothes I had.
tennim, I sooo agree that it’s easier to keep tab on things by weighing in regularly and keeping the lid on 2-3-5 extra pounds instead of waking up with way more. Once I return to normal weight, I intend to do just that. I don’t want to go through this again.
And ditto on the clothes. I have a closet full of things I can’t wear because they’re too small right now, but they’re beautiful clothes and next year at this time I will be wearing them again. I know what you mean about being down to fewer things that fit, but like you, there’s no way I’m going to buy fat clothes in the interim.
We can do this!!!
Still working on it, but I’ve found SparkPeople–a free, online healthy lifestyle program & currently reading the book that the founder recently wrote, The Spark. Can’t say enough good things about both. http://www.sparkpeople.com/
Well, ladies, when you figure it out, please let me know. I began to gain weight with the onset of puberty, 11, and have fought the good fight ever since. I’m 56 now and still fighting. Otherwise healthy, just high blood sugar at this point, borderline diabetic type 2 like my mom.
To lose weight I have to be hungry all the time. I go from one meal to the next waiting for those next 300 calories. Anything over 1500 a day, no loss. That’s not a lot of food.
I only eat good food, no crap. Tried every diet known to man, and then some. It’s not all in the head, and although exercise is always a good idea, that alone does not do it. I have a pattern of losing 20-30 lbs with every diet at first, then plateuing for a good long time, then eventually the hunger drives me back to food.
All my life this fight, I’m tired of it. I’m married, have three small grandkids, lots to live for. Want to retire early, partly because I’m afraid I won’t live long, although my mom is 78 and well other than diabetes well controlled.
So I guess I’ll keep fighting.
Seriously…….you might want to check out Spark People http://www.sparkpeople.com/ & get the book, The Spark. I’ve been battling weight for 40+ years, am in culinary program & in nutrition class we discuss lots of what’s in the program/book re: health, nutrition, calories, exercise……I try to pass on this valuable information to as many people as I can (& I don’t even have any financial interest in it!) ;p
ok I’ll check it out. I just don’t have much confidence in anything anymore, as someone who has been in these trenches all these years. The diet industry has failed me, miserably, and I’m half convinced that someday we will figure out that no matter what, I didn’t stand a chance because it’s my body that is fighting me.
thanks
TELL me about it!!! And I’ve been part of this program for 2 years, but didn’t TOTALLY grasp it until I recently bought the No 1 bestseller & actually discovered I hadn’t followed the suggestions. And it’s not a diet…it’s a healthy lifestyle that incorporates fitness with healthy eating, all the while KNOWING that 20% of the time you’ll still have splurges, which are actually built IN to the program. And STILL people lose 25, 50, 100, 200+ pounds, so…they must be doing SOMETHING right!
And the founder, Chris Downie, has invested all his time & finances so that the site & all it has to offer is totally free. He & partners used to own on-line auction site & were bought out by eBay, making them all millionaires. And, like himself who, altho’ didn’t have weight problem, needed to address certain things in his life including eating healthier & exercising, other people are discovering that once they have success in their health, they have success in other areas: finances, career, relationships, etc.
And they start SOOOOOOOOO slowly, which goes against the way most of us have tried in the past: “I’m going to lose 25# by that wedding in 4 months!” & we almost set ourselves up for failure. I mean, if I can have a “successful day” yesterday after eating a sleeve of Girl Scout thin mints…..that MAKES me want to keep it up! Because I exercised minimum of 10 minutes (actually did 15) & ate at least one fruit/veggie (almost an impossibility NOT to, since except for fish I eat vegetarian; but if I’m pigging out, I can go DAYS w/o eating anything healthy!)…..it was a successful day! And the site offers a supportive community, nutritionist advice, healthy articles, free exercise videos—usually in 10-min segments, connection to others, tons of recipes…..I just can’t say enough good things about it, so hope you give it a shot & plug in to all that it has to offer. I know I am, and am actually going to do it the RIGHT way this time!
Sue/IL
you sound so positive, it’s very tempting. So far I’ve been to the sight and bookmarked it. I’ll see if I can get the book thru the library. I made a vow to myself long ago that I would not spend another dime on weight loss products of any kind because I have BTDT to the tune of probably thousands of dollars.
NO MORE. I will not fatten the wallets of any more weight loss “gurus”. But thanks, I’ll let you know how it goes. My diet is already pretty healthy as I watch my blood sugar now so I have to stay away from simple carbs. we’ll see what else will be sacrificed.
I made the SAME vow, but after being part of SP & seeing more & more people succeed, & reading snippets from the book……I just knew I had to have it, & I’m SO glad I got it because everything I need is in one place instead of having to navigate the website. Not that it’s difficult, but it’s good to see it in front of me in black & white. Plus, I read a little bit of it every night before picking up my novel & usually by the next day I’m semi-consciously putting something into place: making sure I drink all my water; exercising minimum of 10 minutes, etc.
1500 calories is less than what most of us are used to, but if you fill your plate with brocoli, cauliflower, spinach, cucumber, (at least 3 full cups a day minimum) you will be less hungry. That’s a promise. On the days that I find myself looking for something to munch on, it’s always that I have not eaten enough vegetables. A magazine recently showed snacks of 100 calories. You can have either 6 fries or 7 cups of spinach, or 2 cups of brocoli.
I think it comes down to what you value more – eating all that stuff, or looking great. Evening snacking or feeling better. Having that piece of cake (or two) or enjoying fresh air and energy.
The question is, how much do I value myself?
I love revelations. They are life-changers of the best and most effective kind (as I crawl, kick, and squirm through my own at the moment). I’m a student, too, but thank God, no video requirements! Much encouragement…
But, I’m sorry, A Pear Does Not A Breakfast Make. You need fuel for the days that follow The First Day of the Rest of Your Life.
I too have discovered the cure for the common fat and it’s eating better, more nutrient-rich food and less food overall and getting the furnace to burn more. I am 65, have bad osteoarthritis (going in for Knee replacement surgery on Jan. 5) so my level of activity is reduced from even a few years ago when I could walk a couple of miles a day. I have started eating two meals a day, and I stretch my breakfast over a few hours. That may sound funny but I have eggs or cheese and whole wheat bread at 10 or so, I follow at 11 with a V-8 juice and maybe a fruit around 12:30 - I drink more water and I then have a healthy meal at dinner time: fish, about 1 and a half cup of vegetables, a salad and half a cup of cooked rice or half a potatoe. If I am hungry during the evening, I’ll have a fruit, or a small bowl of frozen fruits. I swim about 100 minutes a week but found this did not help enough. I noew use youtube to find high intensity short exercise videos – 10- 15 minutes of heavy sweating, 3 or 4 times a week. In the two weeks I did it, I lost 2 pounds and enough inches at the waist and hips to fit in skirts I was no longer wearing. So, the impossible is possible. And I agree that a pear and a coffe is not a breakfast. You need some protein (2 eggs- 12 grams), some filling carb (whole wheat bread) and ideally some dairy. Eat like a Queen, lunch like a Princess and dine like a pauper.