Knives are going out of fashion!

I noticed when I came to America that people ate differently here. Instead of the familiar ‘fork in the left hand, knife in the right hand’ eating style I had grown up with in England, I noticed a curious dance taking place between hands and implements. The food would be cut in the conventional way using the fork to hold it in place and the knife to cut it, but then the knife would be laid down on the back of the plate, the fork would be transferred to the right hand, and then finally the food was put in the mouth. This strange utensil dance would be carried out for every mouthful, and noticed it was used by people from different socio-economic backgrounds, so had to assume the first experience wasn’t an aberration.

As a child I was taught that the way you eat is a revelation of your social class and background. I learned that eating the wrong way could break business deals, kill potential relationships and thwart any chance of making upwardly mobile connections. Heaven forbid someone should be seen holding their knife like a pen instead of grasping it firmly by the handle, as this would be clear sign that their origins were lowly and – worse yet, hadn’t learned to upgrade their behavior! Given this upbringing, seeing educated and otherwise well-mannered people eating, in a way that in England was not in keeping with their apparent status, was a surprise.

Move on 20 years, and I discovered that the British have mostly stopped buying knives, favoring the informal American style of eating with just a fork in the right hand. From those interviewed for the story, many thought this was a completely normal way to eat. They also had no idea what other eating utensils were for, and couldn’t, for example, tell the difference between a round soup spoon and an elongated dessert spoon. (I can and see hear my grandmother, hand to chest, gasping in horror!)

The explanation is that with the rise of finger foods like pizza and burgers and more store-cooked meals with small pieces, a knife is unnecessary, so only having one utensil makes life easier. As a vegetarian I don’t eat too many things that need cutting up, so admit that at home I often don’t use a knife while eating. However, when I go out to dinner at a friend’s house or to a nice restaurant, my childhood table manners kick back in and I would be mortified to be seen eating improperly.

Once again it makes me realize how quickly social mores and values change, and how cultural differences diminish with internationalization. At a time when the Debutante’s Coming Out Ball is being reinstated in London, can it be long before classes in how to behave at the table and in other social situations filter down to everyone else?

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