I swear to GOD I’ll never do it again, though. Be a hostess, I mean. I think I possibly enjoyed having all my extended family here last Saturday, but I was far too tired to know for sure. And I didn’t get to visit with anybody very much, because – of course – I was too busy running around being “The Hostess”.
I was the one who got to struggle to fit all the food into her refrigerator at least 18 separate times as each person arrived with food that wasn’t safely in a cooler. This in spite of the fact I’d asked them to please bring their food in the above-mentioned coolers, because I simply wouldn’t have enough room in my refrigerator.
I was the one who got to answer the thousand-dollar questions that were asked at least every 3 seconds: “Do you have…. ?” and “Where can I find….. ?” I was the one who then had to try to arrange all the food on her long counter-top in a way that pleased her “Martha Stewart” mother and sister. (This was not possible, of course, so I finally decided to just greet everyone and let said mother and sister arrange my buffet counter to their satisfaction. Everyone was ever so much happier after that.)
Then we finally all ate. And then while everyone else went back to catching up with each others lives, I got to be in charge of putting all the leftovers in zip-loc bags (as ordered by the above-mentioned “Martha” sister), and also mind my Mom by immediately wiping off the counter-top, the dining room table, all our tv trays, and washing everyone’s newly emptied dishes. Thank God I have one sister-in-law who insisted on helping me, bless her heart.
After all that, I finally staggered outside to sit down, relax and just visit with everyone. I think I managed to chat with a few cousins and siblings for a good 30 seconds right before they all started leaving, saying what a great time they’d had with each other.
I’ve found myself wondering – who else absolutely HATES being the hostess at these kind of things instead of a relaxed guest?
…..To be followed soon by the 2nd half of my original blog post…..
(This blog post is one I actually wrote on May 27th. I’m posting it now, partly because I haven’t done many blog posts since the 1st of June, but even more because I really want to post the second half of this blog post about my “5 day guests from hell” who were staying here at the time.)
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p.s. I dropped your name on Gina's post, Barb. ;)
thank you so much Lisa, that helps a lot. I know he tried to blame me for so much stuff, but like I told all of his family and mine none of that added up to a divorce. I do realize it's his needs, it just hurts so bad to think how many years he's
I know this is gonna be good…haha…TRACK
Good? GOOD?!? More like totally traumatizing, TRACK!!! (lmao)
That is so funny, I just went to a party pot luck held outside in a park and the hostess brought food and no cooler. I asked her if she had some ice to put her chicken on top of and she complained that didn’t she do enough? This is really her first hostessing event and will most likely be her last. Other friends and family have been complaining for years that she is the worst guest, leaving dishes and glasses everywhere and never using a coaster and never helps to clean up or set up. I doubt that she will be more appreciative in the future after her experience either. I just didn’t eat the chicken!
OMG – my Mom and sister are fanatics regarding food sitting at room temps, and have made me hyper aware of it, too. I hate it when I’m at someone else’s house and they just let all this food sit there – for HOURS – after everyone has eaten. Totally uncovered food at room temperature. “Yeah, sure – I’d love some of that for leftovers to eat tomorrow, uh-huh. Thanks so much.” (It goes in the trash when I get home if it sat out for hours.)
Regarding not helping the hostess clean up – I totally don’t get that. Normally in our family, everybody helps out and the hostess is told to just go relax – but for some reason that day, it was just me and my sister-in-law. Oh WAIT, that’s not true. My sister oversaw the making up of “care packets” for everybody to take home and insisted I use literally every ziploc bag I had in my house in order to do it. I even got yelled at for not having more. She had to eventually allow me to use some (***gasp***) heavy paper plates with saran wrap and that was just not right.
(You’d have to know my sister. She works for a psychiatrist in a medical center. She went in to work one day to discover her co-workers had made an appointment for her with her own employer. It was just SO funny when I heard about it later. Unfortunately she convinced her employer her problem was ADD or ADHD and he put her on adderal (ritalin) instead of something to make her chill out a bit. So now her anxiety and OCD issues are even worse than they were.)
And I – of course – am all but perfect. (Oh damn, my nose just grew.)
Keep talking, honey…let it all out! LOL
What, my nose? No thank you!!!! (Just wait till tomorrow when I post my follow-up to this one. That’s when I’ll get around to telling the reason the above family gathering was necessary.)
By the way, I just flew home last night from spending 5 days running around with wonderfully crazy friends, and guess who’s cooking supper even as I type? Sometimes I just adore my husband SO much. Sometimes not quite so much, of course, but….. mostly YES. ;-)
The key to good hostessing is being organized. I know, easier said than done, but it is the truth. Ask people to bring specific stuff (green salad for 8 bring your own tongs for serving) OR, you make everything ahead of time that is possible to be made ahead, and for the main do something braised or something else that will keep well till it is served. Use paper plates & biodegradable flatware.
One of my biggest pet peeves is having people in my kitchen saying ‘where’s this? where’s that?’ interrupting what I’m doing. Have all serving pieces and flatware & dishes already out and on the buffet or table. Anywhere OUT of your kitchen.
But most important, linger at the table. Pour more wine, talk with your guests. If your ‘martha’ mom wants leftovers packed up she’ll have to wait till you are done socializing!
Hi malarkey. Thanks for your tips – I actually did everything you mentioned, and even warned my siblings that no-one was to arrive here with their ingredients, planning to make their dish here. But a couple of them did anyway. Plus, it’s important you understand my health problems and the fact that I was dealing with two difficult guests staying here. That’s outlined in the continuance blog post I did today called “The 5-day Guests from Hell.”