I’ve reached my writing apex. What an honor as Gail is one of my favs and a very funny and talented lady. So boys and girls, you’ll just have to put up with me for one day and Gail will return to regale you with her wit and humor.
FINDING MS. RIGHT IN MIDDLE AGE
OK so the the first number in your age is a 5 or a 6. I know that seems harsh but it is not the end of the world unless you damn well have decided to throw in the towel. I’m here to tell you that is not the way to find your “soulmate.” By the same token, you cannot just sit in front of the TV and wait for the doorbell to ring and hope that Penelope Cruz or Selma Hayak will be there saying “I’m here my love, take me.” Sorry kids it doesn’t happen that way. Nor can you just pick out anyone on the street and decide they are the “right” person for you. I really don’t know the exact formula for finding Ms. Right; if I did then my name would be above Bill Gates on the Forbes Richest list.
I do know this however; things have changed and you aren’t going to look across a crowded bar and get the “hot blonde” to go home with you with a wink and a smile. Again, not going to happen. No my friends, at this stage in life you are going to have to use wit, charm, humor and most importantly the ability to LISTEN! We all like to think we are 35 again and can charm our way into a ladies heart in 5 minutes; a la Agent 007. And forget about the 30-something hottie you’ve fantasized about. Unless your bank account has well over 7 figures of discretionary funds, you have nothing in common with her. Now, here is the good part. If you meet that person with the ever illusive “chemistry,” you actually are going to really enjoy talking to her and responding to her. SEX will not be the “be-all and end-all.” Don’t get me wrong, it’s still terrific and an integral component, but you will actually enjoy hugging and kissing as an important part of the relationship. Instead of the conversation being blah, blah, blah when do I get to see you naked, you will ACTUALLY want to talk. Conversations that were once 5 or 10 minutes will go to 1 or 2 hours with no pauses–trust me.
OK, those men out there that are now getting up muttering “this guy is nuts and needs to make his appointment for a “Sex Change,” sit your asses down. I’m a 6′ tall black belt in Karate and I will come after you and take you kicking and screaming into the 21st century. Otherwise it’s going to be you and the TV or People magazine as your steady companion. And ladies, you are not escaping unscathed. We are a bit older and slower. If you see that guy who might be “it” try engaging him. We cannot do this all without encouragement. OK enough of the sermon. Now everyone out there, get up off your butts and try going to the gym, or even dressing in the morning; anything to make you feel better about yourself. If you do others will feel the same about you.
I found the lady of my dreams and I intend to tell her every day how much I care. Here’s the rub, it isn’t work. It’s a pleasure. Thanks again for putting up with me. Gail will return, I promise. Good luck.
Dennis in Palm Springs
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And this affects the Vibrant Woman how? Dennis in Palm Springs makes no mention of the 50+ woman specifically, instead appears to advise his men readers that as they age those gentlemen must work harder in order to attract (read “younger”) women.
Be gone, you have no power here.
Be happy anyway.
Direct Quote: “And forget about the 30 something hottie you’ve fantasized about.”.
One doesn’t need a direct and specific mention if one is reading with an open (and happy!) mind and for the context of the message. Without specifics there is a interpretive choice involved………
Be positive anyway.
My interpretation is if he says “forget about the 30-something” then yes–he is speaking of seasoned women.
Gail Maria, thank you for sharing your friend.
Dennis, enjoy your seasoned lady; may she enjoy you as well.
Dallas La, you got it EXACTLY RIGHT! Thank you for your interpretation.
Oh, I’m going to come to his defense because I know he is not interested in young women. He is really sincere about finding an age appropriate woman to love. Read it again with this in mind.
gail maria no doubt your friend Dennis has good intentions, but I remain unconvinced that the focus of his message is the allure of the older woman. His inference that a younger woman may be a gold-digger doesn’t stand as an endorsement for seeking out an age appropriate partner.
Be happy.
Yakkity1: The woman he spoke of in the blog; the love of his life is SIXTY.
Love this! It’s nice to hear the male perspective.
“If you see that guy who might be “it” try engaging him.”
That’s how I ended up with two kids!
I agree that’s a good methodology and that’s how I ended up with my husband(s) also. However these days I don’t see anyone who might be “it” and they look like “it” they are wearing a wedding ring!
and how old is Mr. Dennis?
Mr. Dennis is 60.
Thank you Dennis, I like your advise and your way of delivering it…you are a brave man to step in here…
He was brave, but felt slighted by Yakkity who accused him of really wanting younger women, which he DOES NOT!. I will give him your message! And I know he will thank you!