A few weeks ago the Los Angeles Times printed an interview with Gloria Steinem. In that interview Ms. Steinem gave her opinions on the current state of the women’s liberation movement.
It is not Ms. Steinem’s interview or opinions that I want to discuss in this posting but one reader’s response to her remarks and I quote:
“It’s time for Gloria Steinem to recognize the early stages of dementia. We’re not living in the 19th century anymore.”
“She and her fellow travelers need to think more about where to be buried than the so –called inequalities women of today are supposed to be facing.”
“Please tell her that the 60’s ended a long time ago”
The reader who responded to Ms. Steinem’s interview was unable to dispute Ms Steinem’s arguments with facts of his own. He chose instead the well worn path of indolent resistance when faced with an opinion which differs from yours…discrimination based on personal characteristic. He demeaned her personally and her argument by suggesting that her age made her incapable.
I agree with much of what Ms. Steinem said in her interview. Women have made enormous strides and there is still much work to be done to equalize pay and opportunity and to ensure that the issues of women worldwide are given equal time and consideration in policy making and personal strategy.
But Ms Steinem is a far better voice for that argument than I am and my voice is needed in another direction…ageism.
Having fought a long and difficult battle to bring equal rights to women in the US and across the world Ms Steinem and her “fellow travelers” will now spend the mature years of their lives being victimized by yet another form of bigotry.
In Ms Steinem’s interview she makes the point that an African American president in the White House does not erase the huge disparity in health, income and employment which still faces many African Americans. She reminds us that racial prejudice is still a reality.
Yes, Meg Whitman ran EBay but many women still work beside men, in the same job, for less pay. Gender discrimination is still a reality.
And now it seems the media supports yet another form of discrimination. Have we learned nothing?
I am appalled that the Los Angeles Times would print this reader’s letter. I like to think they would not print a vicious racial attack on Ms Steinem and I like to think they would not print a vicious attack based on gender. Did they simply fail to notice what this reader was saying? Was it just slightly humorous enough to be worthy of print space?
I can think of many racial and gender based slurs which may have qualified for the same acceptance in the media 40 years ago.
If a woman of Ms Steinem’s stature is to be publicly demeaned for her age then all of us crossing the line to our mature years are in trouble. As the early feminists called us to stop the inequities and to stand bravely and to speak out for what we knew was right I call on us all to do the same thing now on the topic of aging.
v State your age proudly
v Share what you know today
v Show what you do today
v Introduce those who have not seen 50 yet to the vibrant world of opportunity which awaits them on this side of the hill.
We have a very important point to make and being heard on this topic will impact our futures and the futures of those yet to come…sound familiar sisters?
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Indeed it does and L.A. Times what they were doing putting it in print. Even young women try to belittle older women in todays markets. We must put them in their place! I Want to thank her and all those women out there that understand and made a difference, all that you have stated here and more “lives”.
Men will always put women aging down, because they see themselves in the mirror and are afraid. A woman confident in herself, with a purpose, determined, is dangerous. We are not just settling for any male in pants.
I have been told “who do you think you are” when I stated that I don’t date older males! The male got nasty, with rage, but I held my ground and never changed. When you see yourself as equal with any one speaking of males at this point, all hell will break loose! Oh Well!….TRACK
Dementia is really harsh. Calling names? Shame on LA Times.
I am 59 and couldn’t be prouder…If you can’t hear me…I’ll say it a little louder!!” I wear my curly red hair long…my mind is very strong….I’ve got myself a honey…And he thinks I’m very funny..I LOVE being a writer…And when life gets me down…I’m quite the fighter….I’ve been there …Done that…I’m voluptuous NOT fat…YES…I am 59 …HEAR ME ROAR…if you don’t like me…THERE’S THE DOOR!! Proud VN sister Debi Nevel Drecksler… http://www.debidrecksler.com
I hear you roar and I love it…keep it up!
wILD cAT, lOVE iT!…TRACK
Thank you, refreshing and so articulate. so glad someone has the talent to write how I feel!
I’m sorry to hear that such a respected woman had to experience a completely unnecessary and vicious attack on something so trivial — her age. I just turned 60 years old and I am neither proud nor apologetic about this. It’s just my age. It’s how long I’ve lived on the planet. I’m the same person I always was, maybe a little wiser. I never allow anyone to treat me like crap. But then I was always like this, LOL. By not accepting bad behavior from people, you are teaching them how to treat you. Don’t expect anything less than respect, no matter what your age.
Great article. Good stuff. The majority of folks in the Western World are now the Babyboomers. I have never really understood, why women had to fight for human rights, rights the men had long before us. Why were we denied education, voting, equal pay for equal jobs [which is still not where it should be]. Why were women always second class citizens? Without women – where would the men-folk be? Would they want to have babies, LOL? There are a lot of things, which make no sense, and one of them is discrimination - against women, and many, many others. We do not need Bigotry, there are enough other problems in this world. When I was in my 30s, I had a hard time relating to a lot of older people. All I heard were complaints. I decided to volunteer in a Nursing Home, and I completely changed my mind about the elderly. I enjoyed spending time reading to them and doing arts and crafts with them. It changed my outlook on so many things in life. I also decided that I’d rather be dead than end up in a State-run nursing home. Those places are my view of Purgatory, if there is such a thing.
First of all let me applaud you for dealing with your feelings about the elderly by volunteering in a nursing home. That was an amazing way to take that one on and so smart . I wish I had the courage to always face my negative feeling that way.
My sister upon retiring from a successful career as girls school headmistress earned her Masters degree in Divinity and was then ordained as an Anglican minister. She is now 77 years old and works a 50 hour week ministering to the aged in numerous nursing homes in her community.,
She, like you says she hopes not to end up in one but she also talks about how amazing the residents are. She speaks about their gratitude, not gratitude just to her but for life in general. She describes how open these people are to life and experience and to diverse opinion.
She talks about their need to still contribute to society recently she encouraged them to donate to victims of the Haiti earthquake and she said they felt great making even a tiny contribution.
Yes conditions can be very difficult in government run and even some private nursing homes and that is a shameful fact in our society. My sister’s experience and yours also reminds me that even in those circumstances their residents,their attitude and their wisdom have much to teach us.
thank you for your reply. You are a very nice looking lady, but I absolutely need to know what you are wearing on top of your head in your pic. Normally, I am not all that nosy, but I am intrigued this time. I love VN – it is such an interesting site. This is what I think about Bigotry and Prejudice: “Prejudice is a Raft onto which the shipwrecked Mind clambers and paddles to Safety” – a quote by Ben Hecht, American Author 1894 – 1964, and still sooo true to this day. 65 and still very much alive, Sabina
I love your quote it is great. I think I will tweet it .
That thing on my head isa hat. It is made of straw. I bought it in France ina little village. It was made by a family of hat makers who made hats for Josepine Baker who lived nearby.
There may be some of their hats in this photo gallery of Josephine.
http://www.cmgww.com/stars/baker/about/photogallery.html
My daughter and my best freind think the hat is strange but I have always quite enjoyed being a bit strange and seem to get more that way as I age.
I love VN too because it has great folks like you
i don’t see anything on top of your head
LOL The pic you are looking at is new. I like variety.
How wonderful! I am so glad someone has come up with this topic…it was about time we discuss age from a woman’s point of view, a sensible woman that is. Thank you, Jaki!! The world is so wrong about age and beauty and we women have allowed society to dictate who we are and how we should look. Aging is no longer a path into wisdom, it is something to be ashamed of….how sad. I’ll be 60 in a couple of weeks and I have to say the landmark in my years have brought a sense of liberation I have not felt since I was in college in the 60s. Suddenly I am that “girl” again and feel fantastic!! Look great too, I’m told….and not because I have done anything to enhance my physical appearance, but because confidence and purpose have a way to illuminate you from the inside and make “beautiful”.
Thank you all of you wonderful women in VN…this one of the best things around!!!
You have just manged in a few lines to sum up my entire book! Can i hire you to write my next one…you are so much more efficient than me.
I interviewed women between 45 and 102 in 5 countries and they told me exactly what you are saying here,
“I have to say the landmark in my years have brought a sense of liberation I have not felt since I was in college in the 60s. Suddenly I am that “girl” again and feel fantastic!! Look great too, I’m told….and not because I have done anything to enhance my physical appearance, but because confidence and purpose have a way to illuminate you from the inside and make “beautiful”.
They talked about confidence, purpose, trust, friendship, safety, comfort in their own skin… all sorts of things that have changed for the better with age.
We have much to celebrate on this site because women here are voicing the wonder of aging…finally a place to celebrate what we are today
Thank you! Just tell me how I can help…..I am, in a small way, a writer too (self-published a book), a keeper of jurnals and a believer in aging gracefully.
“We have much to celebrate on this site because women here are voicing the wonder of aging…finally a place to celebrate what we are today” Amen to that!!!!
Unfortunately, we boomers contributed mightlily to the practice of ageism and now, we must contribute mightily to stop it. To quote Pogo, “We’ve seen the enemy and it’s us.”
Excellent!!! Advertisers, in their lust for consumer dollars, have convinced us that ageing is a fault to be overcome…and we’ve responded by spending literally billions of dollars to be creamed, waxed, pummeled, injected, sliced, and diced – all in the quest to stay young. We need to learn to see and appreciate the beauty in ourselves and each other as we age. This isn’t only an issue for older women. Even if you’re young and beautiful now, you only have two options: get older or die. Resistance is futile – and extreme resistance has the possibility of making you look pathetic. We have to stop striving for an ideal of youthful perfection that is impossible for most women to achieve even temporarily. Virtually NO woman can sustain it.
Since turning 50, I’ve graduated magna cum laude from UCLA, got a masters degree in England, lived in Japan and Europe (I’d never even traveled internationally before that), started doing stand-up comedy and performed a one-woman show, and wrote a book about it (Lady Boomer, Late Bloomer). I’m 57 now and looking forward to more wonderful adventures! The other side of 50 can be FABULOUS!!!
I have had the honor of hosting an online radio show for over 8 years. Recently I interviewed Donna Henes, a NY city shawoman. Her latest book, The Queen of My Self, debunks the Triple Goddess theory put forward by a man in my lifetime… I am 69. After much angst as she moved past 50, she did alot of research into the phases of a women’s life and says there is a phase that was been left out, therefore diminished. The “ancient” phases according to a man are maiden, mother, crone.
Weaving the World Radio
Where do we find the acknowledgment of the dynamic phase, powerful, reaching, freeing and contributing that occurs after the children are raised?
I think that men in power have tried to ignore, diminish or leave women who are ready to “roar”!
No more.
I could blame the men, I am married and I have those days when men seem like a good target for most of what ails me. But the truth on this one is …time is to blame.
We, women, used to die before we passed through menopause and then we lived a small while after but we were not so vocal about what we thought. But all that has changed. We have a voice now and we could live almost as long after the big “change” as before. So we need to apply our voice to spreading the word about how good life is after 50 and how much we can achieve after 50.
Lets lead by example for those men!
It’s one thing to voice a disagreement to someone’s opinion and quite another to launch a head-on attack, especially on someone like Gloria Steinem. Shame on the LA Times for printing this guy’s rant.
Hooray for your thoughtful blog post and to the VN members for chiming in with responses. At 63—grey haired, in a relationship that started not quite four years ago, a full-time writer and storyteller—I am completely comfortable in my body and life and NOT apologetic about my appearance nor shy about telling my age.
Still, I was taken by surprise Saturday when a same-age friend told me I’d inspired her to stop dyeing her hair because she likes the looks of my silvery locks.
There are not many in my wonderful circles of friends who are OK with grey. They are gorgeous women heading into cronehood with pizzazz, so they’d look glorious with any color hair. For me it’s a matter of being at ease with aging and not being at ease with subjecting my body to avoidable chemicals.
But that’s only hair. Fifty and fabulous? Yes! Sixty and sexy? Hooray! Seventy and sassy? Why not! Eighty and edgy? Go for it! And on it goes…
Being proudly 63 doesn’t erase ageism, but it’s a stone in the pond, rippling outward.
Can I tweet this?
“Being proudly 63 doesn’t erase ageism, but it’s a stone in the pond, rippling outward.”
This is role modeling at its best!
Thank you
I get sick of the condescending attitude of many younger people toward those of us who are older. We older people are a storehouse of vast knowledge and experience that younger people could learn from if they were open to it but few seem to be in my opinion.
I am 61 but have girlfriends between the ages of 28 and 90. I think we can reach out to the younger women, woman to woman, and really get to know them. We have so much in common. We know how difficult it is to builld a career and raise a family, we have been through incredible challenges as life has handed us the usual developmental issues, the losses of people we love, our pets, job, health, natural disasters, husbands with their own issues, and the list goes on. Can we not empathize with these lovely young women and teach them about how we can support them?
It occurs to me that when a young woman slams an older one for her “age,” she is really slamming her own mother. She has not yet developed her own relationship to the feminine. Hopefully, she will find the “Great Mother” through us and find ways to heal her own psyche and pull out of the negative animus that drives her to generalize with the “always, never, should and oughts” that come out of her mouth. I would hope she could some day understand that it is not them against us, it is all of us together.
Right on, sister! Women can and should be who and what they wish to be. It’s none of my personal business what other women choose to do or not do (re: Hillary’s marriage, women staying home with their kids instead of manning the barricades, etc.). I think it’s ironic that certain women who harp on “family values” got their knickers in a twist because Mrs. Clinton decided to keep her marriage and family intact by forgiving her husband and staying married. Her husband: her decision. I think the best way we as older people in general, not just women, can fight ageism is to be the best people we can be, regardless of how long we’ve lived, and share our lives, resources, and wisdom with other people of all ages when possible. As for young women who belittle older ones, I just have to laugh and shake my head, because their time will come unless they are unlucky enough to die young. No one is really able to imagine being old until they get there; it’s simply beyond their comprehension. I imagine that young people who are grossed out by old people will have a much harder time of it when it happens to them. Their smooth, tanned skin will be just as crinkly as mine and their trendy tatts will be black blobs. Whether I’m here or not, I know that revenge will be sweet. ((hugs)) Lin
I totally agree with Lin about Hillary Clinton’s decision–it is her business and you have to walk the proverbial mile in her shoe before you know what you would do. She couldn’t have won with some people no matter what she did.
I was brought up by a man who was ahead of his time. My father discussed world events and politics with me from the time I was very young. He encouraged me to go into politics, always saying I could do whatever I decided to do. Well I didn’t go into politics but I did end up being the first female supervisor to work in a male penitentiary in the Canadian Prison System. A position that poses challenges regardless of gender, and even though the male staff put in a class grievance when I first went there they withdrew it six weeks later. I earned their respect. My problem was more directed at management. They had appointed two women as wardens in male prisons in the area, who knew absolutely nothing about the job–they were there for political reasons. These women always smiled nicely and never, never caused problems with their seniors. They never offered anything new to a male only system they just continually looked inadequate. The senior management of Corrections also expected me to be that woman who laughed at the lame jokes of the higher up males and not to argue or have any real opinions. But I had been brought up to voice my opinions and fight for what I considered was right and I did so continually. I became very unpopular in the upper echelons of the system. They were only playing games with us and too many women were willing to ‘smile’, etc. to get where they wanted to go.
That was then, I believe the problems of to-day, with the teenagers coming into womanhood now are more serious. Sexting, giving b.j’s to boys (even at school dances ), are part of the way many young girls are thinking now. It is so sad to see them degrade themselves in this way. What has happened? One thing has been some of the shows on TV. All these shows showing teenage sex and girls as young as 9 an 10 soaking them in. And the popularity of Sex in the City when it was on. I chastised both my daughter and daughter-in-law for allowing their young daughters watch it. No matter what they say, the things kids watch, and hear, does affect their behaviour. Some more than others, of course, but it does.
Like other women here I am a strong woman and have my causes and fight for them. I think I have the reputation of being knowledgeable and tough. Old and fat or not. However, I think the message of the sixties and seventies has gotten lost. How do we tell these girls that sending pictures of your boobs across the air waves is not cool, and not a sign of independence.
What a great question and I would love to see some responses from readers here. unfortunately doing something your parents don’t approve of has always been a sign of Independence…remember?
The problem is some actions have lifetime repercussions either real ,as in you can’t get that pic off the Internet or imagined, your self esteem takes a big hit and you end up hating yourself for some action you did out of rebellion
So readers…how do we share the best messages with young girls?
I hope this works. I thought if I responded to my own message it would be seen by you all.
I think this conversation is fantastic. We have shared the word! Life after 50 is full of opportunity and energy, new careers, new relationships and self confidence enough to fill a second lifetime.
I am on a mission to share this word with as many women of all ages as we can so thank you for speaking out here. And thank you to VN for giving us this space to chat.
To honour VN I even went and filled out my profile… The VN Interview and The postcard to My Younger Self was a lot of fun
Many of the women I speak to agree that this stage of life is rich and full, they tell me the same thing in the interviews I conduct and on my book website http://www.fiftyfab.com but still so many people dread aging.
How can we spread the good and positive word and turn the negative tide on aging?…any ideas?
I would love to hear them and thank you again for inspirational responses!
Sandra and all you wonderful women,
Here’s what I have found. Ageism is alive and well. I faced it only recently in my job search through disguised phrases “over qualified,” “did not grow up on the Internet,” “experienced in traditional media makes it hard to shift to digital.” All these are blarney. Shocked at first, I am more resolute in my job search and also contemplating starting some consultancy.
Yes, I am not 30 anymore, but like the bit from Monty Python “I’m not dead yet.” I am AGED TO PERFECTION. I don’t need plastic surgery or anything else to make me feel young and hip. I have always been comfortable in my skin. I am also thinking seriously about writing a book about AGED TO PERFECTION: From Boomer to ‘Tweener (because Boomers are now in between being old and young).
Thank you for giving us a platform to voice our opinions and shout out to the world that we have a lot to offer. The lines on our faces are the wisdom of our years – we’ve earned it.
- Molly Walpola
Amen! I’m 50 and proud of it. I grew up listening to and admiring Ms Steinem. Since my early teens, I have frequently said both public and quiet, personal ‘thank yous’ to Ms. Steinem and her partners in courage. Here I reiterate, “Thank you, Ms. Steinem.” One of my achievements I take most pride in, is that my daughter understands what the ‘women’s libbers’ won for us and continues in this tradition in her everyday life.
After being a single parent for over half my life, in many ways I feel I’m just now beginning. I have a degree of freedom to act that I never had before, I have experience, I have wisdom. I recently decided that it was time to go back to school. I want a livelihood that isn’t just a job or ‘career’–I want a life style that makes a difference and allows me both the time and financial freedom to enjoy this next stage of life.
Just yesterday afternoon, I was pondering about the way many young women use their youth as a point of triumph over older women as if it were something they merited through personal achievement rather than just a stage on the journey we all travel. Sometimes when I observe these young women I can’t help but quietly smirk, “If you only knew, baby!”
Well, my VN Sisters, let me tell you a little story. One night not too long ago, the fellow I have been dating for nearly a year came to spend the evening with me – (I’m a youthful 62; he’s a handsome widower, 5 years my junior.) Out of the blue, he started to talk about how he was approached in a bar where he sometimes hangs out to play cards with his pals, by a young (38), attractive and sexy blonde “dancer” who tried to pick him up. “OMG! Where’s THIS going?!?!”, I thought to myself. My heart was just pounding, as I thought he was about to tell me he’d fallen for someone else! As in younger, blonder, hotter…you get the picture! (I REALLY would have been hurt as I am crazy “bout him!) He kept on with the story: he told her he was involved with someone, in a serious relationship (ME!!) and that he was not interested in her! Then he went on to say older women know things, they are sexier and more fun to be with, and a lot less complicated, He went on to say he’s never been so happy as he has been with me since his wife died many years ago, and I know that he’s dated a lot of women. I also now know that it’s ME he cares about, even with the little wrinkles and the extra 10 lbs. and the grey hair here and there! SO there’s a little fable about how 62 trumps 38! Sometimes I wonder how SHE must have felt when he rebuffed her advances…..but I’m the one with the Mona Lisa smile=:)
Thank you for this post. We must make it unacceptable for anyone to demean or belittle our opinions while covering their bigotry with ageist attacks. I’m 57 and will publish my first book next week. I ventured into a writing career because I was downsized from corporate America. I was the oldest woman let go during that layoff. I will not let a downturn nor anyone’s opinion of what I “should” do limit me, my talents or my dreams. Bravo to you for speaking out.
Dear Cindy,
It seems we are kindred spirits. I am 58 and will release my first book in North America next week (it released in the UK in Feb)
Tell me about your book. I want to know what wonderful ideas you have used your experience to produce.
I work as an HR in a small nursing home. I have a BA in Human Resources/Human Services. I make less than a comparable man in this position. And I just got cut back to 32 hours due to the economy. Don’t tell me women, especially those single and over 50, aren’t discriminated against! I know first hand.
I am sorry for your frustration and your situation. I agree that inequity still exists in employment and other areas too. The battle is not won for women’s rights and maybe it never will be in a way that we can stop our vigilance and commitment.Thank you for reminding us.
My thoughts on this readers negative comments about Gloria Steinem is that his attacks are based not in ageism, but rather in the age old right wing vs left wing battle. It is his way of insulting a ‘progressive’ woman. He could not argue with real facts so he attacked the only way he could…below the belt and by being downright mean. I wouldn’t give him the courtesy of any further responses to his response. He and Rush Limbaugh are made from the same cloth.
My guess is the “gentleman” in question is not reading posts on this website!
I wrote to the Times to respond to him but they don’t print responses to responses so he remains in his ignorance.
I agree his attack may have been politically motivated but what I object to is his use of age as an insult.
Sabina put it best in her post above
“”Prejudice is a Raft onto which the shipwrecked Mind clambers and paddles to Safety” – a quote by Ben Hecht,
I watched Frontline last night on PBS, a program about people who have lost their jobs in the wave of the banking fiasco, people desperately looking for work — all over 50. Experience means nothing in today’s market; employers don’t want to pay for it, and when people get close to retirement, they save lots of money by hiring young people and cutting off benefits for the long-time employee. I’m finding myself a victim of the new system. It stinks.
I am a 63 year old retired primary school teacher who is well aware of how differently certain segments of the population view me now–since I decided to let my formerly blond tresses remain silver. Some view me, now that my stage in life is far more obvious, as even more deserving than ever of their respect and consideration, while others now dismiss me without a thought. For the most part, I am referring to complete strangers. I am referring to people who have not even heard what I have to say or have not even been witness to what I am still very capable. Their view of me is all based on assumption. Some of their assumption is correct, and some of it is not. Some of it is in my favour. Obviously, some of it is not. That is why I seek out opportunities to speak out. That is why I became a contributing writer, in a volunteer capacity, for a monthly, inspirational newsletter distributed by the psychic, Lewis Mabee. It is a way for my voice to be heard.
I am actually in favour of the Los Angeles Times printing such a controversial letter. By doing so, its readers were reminded that such discrimination exists. By doing so, Jaki, you were prompted to react so eloquently and passionately here. Perhaps, my dear, the paper printed that letter, not to give support to its writer, but to raise such a response as yours. We must be careful what we assume.
You raise a very important point and I hope you are right about what the LA Times may have had in mind. Perhpas I should write them a thank you note on behalf of all of us who have joined in the converatsion here.
You sound very much at peace Bunnity…it is a joy to listen to.
Thank you
I think a thank you letter is an excellent idea, Jaki. Sincere gratitude for both the opportunities we’re given and the obstacles we face is what gives us the inspiration and determination to rise to any occasion, to rise above any circumstance.
Speaking of gratitude, I must thank you for mentioning I sound at peace. That is not something that I came by easily, and I must still work at it daily. It’s good to hear when one’s work is noticed.
I liked reading about your energy and how you are going to volunteer as a contributing writer; I thought how good you would be as a writer about “metaphysical” concepts….I mean, this country is going through so much with those “public shootings”..it’s got to be about personal depression..
I had wishes/ideas that someone would consider writing about the beliefs of “Judith Olaff”. Is that what people are afraid of?? That idea that people are communicating through their will?? I know, it is a bit far fetched but, I saw that you write and, I wished someone would write about the fact that there is a “higher” way to communicate. That its not something to be afraid of once it is defined. I know, I just hope for your idea of a new career and, I see a great deal of success to whoever starts writing about the metaphysical part of life… Lots of Luck in your future job!
I mispelled the therapist/theorist’s name..It’s Judith Oloff Sorry.
I am still amazed how little evolution really occurs.
After being a nurse for over thirty five years I am very aware doctors treat people based on their sexual preferences. Meaning do they prefer a thin, blond, brunette, young, very young, tall or short partner. There was a time that every issue I had was because my dress size was larger than a size zero. Now the standard answer is “you are getting older what do you expect”? I wonder if this is taught in med school?
When I go to a hairdresser I am given the old lady look, all the dresses in my size look like something my grandmother would NOT wear. I guess the marketing experts must have missed the memo that the largest portion of the population is over fifty. We want to spend our money on on items that meets our definition of desirable or important. We do not want to purchase products that someone else has determined we should want.
At fifty eight years old I have just been laid off from my job. Discrimination is blatant. When a younger person was given a job we had both applied for (and qualified for) I decided to push on the HR consultant. I was labeled a trouble maker.
The good news is I have enough experience to start my own business. I make enough money to have my clothes made and choose a hairdresser that does what I want. I also have enough smarts to not continue going to a doctor whose skills are determined by their hormones.
Women of all ages believe in yourself. Go for what makes you happy. Love and live out loud. For woman who choose to have children teach them love, tolerance and acceptance. Embrace other woman they are not the threat.
Life is too short and this is not the dress rehearsal. It is our choice to set the standards - what ever age you are.
What a fantastic response. Thank you for your words and your obvious strength and courage in life.
I so agree on the clothes issue. Every time I go to buy a one piece swimsuit I come home and say to my husband ,”why do clothing manufactures assume that when you reach the age at which you no longer want a bikini you have also lost all your sense of taste.” I can’t believe some of the one piece styles and patterns! Help!
FYI-Eileen Fischer makes great clothes that are elegant and comfortable…I think that has become my criteria for clothing.
Like you I have shopped and shopped to find a doctor, hairdresser etc that respects what I am, my age and my personality.It takes time but it is worth it. I have left a lot of salons that wnated to dye my silver locks.
We know now more than ever in our lives that we have the right and ability to be comfortable in ourselves and in the environments in which we choose to spend time.
Good fortune in your work, typing right now from my home office I can testify you will love the freedom of this world of your own. But stay connected outside too in professional associations or networking groups. These connections help you to stay fresh and up to date and other women,what the heck, men too, need your wisdom.
What a great article. Last year I turned 60 and I couldn’t have been more excited. 60 is the new 40! So just let anyone try to put me down and they will have a serious butt-kicking coming to them. Have you read Gail Collins’ new book on the women’s movement from the sixties to the present. I think you’ll appreciate it.
Gloria is still and will always be a total goddess. Typical, that the hateful article was written by a man who is clearly afraid of all things vagina.
Thank you for the book recommendation. That is what i love about this site, every time you interact you learn more!
I appreciate the intention of your comment, “60 is the new 40″ but I prefer a Gloria Steinem type quote,”this is what 60 looks like”
Let’s change the view of what 60 or 70 or 80 is. You don’t have to be less than 50 to be Fabulous!
Frankly what I see is the younger women of today don’t care. They treat older people as if they are senile. They laugh when you talk to them about the environment. They will tell you straight out, that they do not care. Most of them believe that discrimination existed in the 1800′s and few know that women didn’t get the vote until the 1900′s. I believe that this is the fault of education. This facts are rattled off in a way that does not get the point across. After all, some of our school text books state that someday man will land on the moon. The sad part is the teachers don’t know the difference. I share with those younger than me and help them understand what women have gone, not just 200 years ago, but within the last 50 years.