Remember when a chick flick was a cute romantic movie about a girl looking for, finding and living happily ever after with, a guy?
OK some of those were fun
They still make lots of those movies. But it seems my 50+ film tastes have changed. I wonder if this has anything to do with hormones… Everything else seems to. Well whatever the cause… I am on the hunt for something more than sweet romance on the big screen.
As I lean back on the couch and dive into the home popped corn in the big red bowl that I bought for my husband because I wanted it, I have matured expectations for what will roll out before me.
I want to see my sisters portrayed on the screen as:
- Older
- Wiser
- Stronger
- Funnier
- Smarter
…because that is what we are at this age. I want to see women just like me and my friends working their way through story lines which are stunningly entertaining…so not at all like my life!
Below is my list of favs:
- CheriI love this line from Cheri: “I find that when the skin is a little less firm it holds the perfume better.” This is a wonderful example of that uniquely female quality which mixes vanity and practicality. It also sums up the nature of the lead female character in one very funny/wise comment.
- Out of AfricaThis is my all time favorite film about a woman. Karen is brave, intelligent beguiling and loving. She has the strength which comes with self knowledge, hard earned on the tougher playing fields of life. I admire her character immensely and have wept at the end of this film all 16 times I have watched it. Karen is a very real character, inspiring but also showing a weaker side which offers the audience an opportunity to forgive and embrace themselves for the fatal flaws that they bear. The self knowledge which nourishes the older woman is the knowledge earned in a real life, earned from victory and defeat, from strength and from the lessons and acceptance of weakness.
- Shirley ValentineShirley Valentine lives the dream for so many of us. She runs away and fun and sun and sex…a wonderful fantasy. But in the in the end she is more experienced, a little bruised, but most importantly, much wiser. This is the story of the maturing woman. Wouldn’t it be nice if we all had a Greek island on which to mature?
- It’s ComplicatedMy book Fifty & Fabulous has been promoted in the UK in conjunction with the release of It’s Complicated. This film is a Streepwise version of the Women of the Harvest. Women of the Harvest are what I call the heroines in my book, women who embrace themselves and their aging and as a result reap the bounty of live 50+. The female lead in It’s Complicated is a woman struggling with an empty nest, a unfinished marriage, a new dating life and a blossoming sense of her self. She manages to endure and triumph and cry just enough to endear us. She has some tough decisions to make but is able to inform those decisions with the self knowledge her midlife status has brought her. In the end she does what she needs to do. I don’t want to spoil the ending, but she does exactly what we would all expect our heroine Ms. Streep to do.
- Calendar GirlsGirls? No surely they have earned the title “women” – brave and inspiring women who get comfortable enough in their own skin to put it forth to support a dear friend. It is the journey away from personal self consciousness and into deeper consciousness that is the hallmark of aging for women.
- Private Lives of Pippa LeeThis is in many ways a very sad film but it is what I would call a Chrysalis film. It is about the tendency of women to give themselves away to things and people, gladly but sometimes sadly. This movie reminds us that it is never too late to find your voice and to speak it. The result of doing so is not what is most important. It is the action which really counts. Let us celebrate the voices which finally rise lifted by the courage which comes uniquely with maturity.
What are your favorites?
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Sonho, I hope that you are not the only one explaining all this to your kids. At first, I would tell them to go ask their father when they ask questions. Don't let him get off scott free without having to explain himself. None of this is your f
I'm a librarian, Haralee. I love to share books!
I LOVED “Something’s Gotta Give”. I’m a long time fan of Diane Keaton, have a ridiculous crush on Keanu Reeves, and Jack Nicholson is, well, Jack Nicholson!
It was an ADULT chick flick and those are so rare these days. The scene outside of the restaurant where Diane Keaton’s character says to Jack’s character, “This is heartbroken,” gets me every time.. and I mean every time.
Haven’t seen any of the others you mentioned except Calendar Girls, which I enjoyed immensely. Helen Mirren is a stellar actress and I enjoy anything she is in. I’ve been meaning to see It’s Complicated — that one looks like a winner as well.
OMG, I love Something’s Gotta Give. I have the DVD and have watched it I don’t know how many times. I also love a movie called One Special Night with James Garner and Julie Andrews. It’s very sweet and is a hoot in between! It’s a holiday type movie, but can be watched at any time.
I totally agree “Something’s gotta Give” is a terrific movie. I also have a ridiculous crush on Keanu, he can leave his shoes under my bed anytime. Just kidding, my husband would probably not like him leaving his shoes around our house, even if they were under the bed.
I also loved Shirley Valentine and Calendar Girls (which I just watched for the umpteenth time last week). there are two that I love that aren’t very well known and, to tell you the truth, I don’t even know if they are available on DVD – I have them on VHS:
Chantilly Lace and American Dreamer – both feature Jo Beth Williams. Chantilly Lace, in particular, is an amazing movie. It was first made for Showtime and features an all-female cast. The actors were given the bios of their characters, the plot outline, and then put in a room and told to do what came naturally – there were no scripts. The finished product is genius. The other women are Talia Shire, Ally Sheedy, Martha Plimpton, Lindsey Crouse and Jill Eikenberry. It is the ultimate women’s movie about relationships and how women take care of each other.
Finally, Flower Bear…someone who has seen (and loved) Chantilly Lace! A truly amazing movie I’ve watched over and over and… In these days of DVD’s I have to ensure I have a working VHS just so I may take an afternoon to enjoy my copies of all three you mentioned…Shirley Valentine (Pauline Collins was perfect for that role), Calendar Girls and Chantilly Lace.
Wow, CL sounds really cool. I’ll have to check it out!
My, my Shirley Valentine…is something I would vouch for.What a film! The spirit, the maturity, the realization in talking to the wall…is wonderful.
‘You are married to him, not joined at the hip’…is the nice fun message I took from the film.
And that strengthened my deisre to visit Italy, which I did alone in April10, when my husband did not have time and inclination.
Though I did not have the Greek guy stuff
)
I finished seeing the film again just last week.
Thanks for the list…I will start watching them one by one.
Loved ‘Iit’s complicted’
I so much want the girls my age to enjoy just as much, but my voice falls flat amongst my kind… I am from India, live in the US of A.
I haven’t seen most of the movies on your list but did love Shirley Valentine and Calender Girls. I would add Somethings Gotta Give and Steel Magnolias.
A movie I have seen several times and laughed at each one is Saving Grace with Brenda Blethyn and Craig Ferguson who plays her neighbor and partner in crime. It came out in 2000 so can be hard to track but I believe it available through Netflix.
LOVE Saving Grace!!! I’m SO glad you mentioned this!!!
I would add Harold and Maude to this film festival …
Love love love Saving Grace.
Moonstruck…laughed, cried and totally love this movie…
I love that movie! I get such a kick out of the “party” towards the end of the movie where everyone is enjoying themselves! I also love “While You Were Sleeping…” “Something’s Gotta Give” & When Harry Met Sally” all good chick flicks.
Enchanted April is delightful.
I love this movie!!
I loved this movie. It was fantastic. I loved her spunk and her pant suit!
Thank you for reminding me
Why are you calling these mature, sexy, delightful movies “chick flics?” That is an outdated and demeaning term. My friends and I have been neither “girls” nor “chics” since we turned 18. Why not have a contest to rename this genre of film to make it appealing to everyone?
I just read a review of “Sex and the City” which stated the “girls” are a bit long in tooth to be playing “girls,’ and their attire and behavior was insulting to the Muslim Emirates in which it was filmed. Grow up, folks!
Some of my favorites: “Out of Africa;” “Julia” with Vanessa Redgrave and Jane Fonda; “Mamma Mia” the movie with those sexy mature-woman dance routines that had everyone’s eyes popping with joy; “Letters to Juliette” with Vanessa Redgrave and long-time love Franco Nero making the screen come alive with their love;: “The Bishop’s Wife” with Loretta Young, David Niven, and Cary Grant–a bit dated, but Loretta is strong, classy, and a winner; “Thelma and Louise;” even the updated “Karate Kid” has a beautiful young Chinese violinist who plays a pivotal role in the film.
The Bishops Wife is one of my favorite classic films. Loretta Young plays a strong woman in an uncomfortable situation with great dignity and integrity.
I adored Calendar Girls! Meryl Streep is my all time favorite actress because she always shows the richness, texture and depth of the woman she portrays. I love anything she is in and I am thrilled that she continues to take on roles that allow her to do this even as she ages. That being said, I have to go rent It’s Complicated!
I applaud you for writing about this — although I agree with Marina, the term “chick flicks” was not the best idea. Not because I think it is demeaning to women (I don’t) but because it tends to suggest women under 40.
In any case, fantastic choice of films, and your book, Fifty & Fabulous, is a solid read — well worth the investment of time and money!
I adored It’s Complicated — have seen it twice already. Not just because Meryl Streep is a goddess, but because the film celebrates older women as sexual, intelligent beings who are actually preferrable to younger women. This is essentially the perspective I take. My blog, SeptemberMay, is dedicated to all subjects related to aging (and doing it with grace), but also, celebrating the older woman as having an eroticism and beauty that younger women can only dream of. I hope folks can visit me there:
http://septembermay.blogspot.com/
Great post, Jaki — and by the way, I’ve tried several times to subscribe to your blog, but can’t figure out how to do it!
Jesse
Like this post and the comments. Saw all these films (awhile ago for most) and agree with all of them except It’s Complicated. I found the mature women in that movie to be rather shallow and incredibly silly. Streep, whom I usually love, giggled through almost every line! Besides, they were so incredibly priveledged as to be totally unrelatable to most women I know. I mean come on, Streep lives in a house the size of which most people only dream of and she’s fretting over building an addtition because she has empty nest syndrome?!! Yeah, it’s great to see women of a certain age “struggling” though life’s decisions, but I’m wondering just how many mature women out there have the resources Streep’s character had to weather those “struggles” so easily.
Hi SpeakEtc., for the most part I agree with you in regard to ‘priveledged’, as most women at our age and/or with the enconomy today. So that wasn’t realistic to me, but as for her character being shallow, I disagree, cause aside from her financial wealth, she is just like me and many others, struggling with saggy skin, being left for a younger woman, and dealing with empty next syndrome, she is real. I could only dream of owning my own home, small business and having money to spend, my life would be less complicated. But all in all I enjoyed the movie very much and it sure did make me laugh and it is laughter that gets me through the day…. Take care, Moonstruck
I liked It’s Complicated also…laughed at most of it. So true to life as a empty-nester. I so looked forward this time in my life when I was raising my family. I am finding that now that it is here…not so much fun. But life does go on and I still believe that “Life is What You Make IT”.
Letters to Juliet was a delightful movie for our age group. Definitely a “chick flick’ for us to see. I think that chick flick is just a term and people shouldn’t read so much into everything. It a nice way to say, “Leave your husband at home for this one!” I appreciate knowing which ones to see with another women rather than my husband. It saves on so much criticism later.
Thank you for the response and sorry you have had a problem with my blog sign in. Just put your email in the box that says ” Get email updates” You also need to verify your email by responding to the confirmation mail we send you.
Also nearly all my blogs are also here on VN. I love it here and there are some great gals to converse with
I do not notify my readers of every blog post just the ones I think they would really like. Please also bring you r positive voice on aging to my Your Voice page..tell us what you think is fabulous about being 50+
Thank you for your comment on Fifty & Fabulous The Best Years of a Woman’s Life it is rewarding to hear from readers that they resonate with the message and the voices of the amazing women I interviewed.
To Fabulousness!!
Funny Lady
She-Devil
Fame
When Harry Met Sally
It’s Complicated
Meet the Fochers
The Second Wives Club
Nine to Five
Mamma Mia
First Wives Club
And all the others, especially, Calendar Girls and Shirley Valentine!!!
Love the idea of the contest to name these flicks!!!!!
Under the Tuscan Sun and Fried Green Tomatoes…love those too!
Bonneville with Kathy Bates , jessica lange and Joan Allen .
The Family That prays Kathy Bates and Alfe Woodward
I loved Bonneville and Kathy Bates - filmed partly in Utah and the Bonneville Salt Flats… I laughed and laughed. Mama Mia, It’s Complicated….
I also loved Bonneville. One no one has mentioned that is one of my all time favourites is The Big Chill.
I also loved Bonneville. One no one has mentioned that is one of my all time favourites is The Big Chill.
Big Chill & American Dreamer i love both of them have both of them and watch them offten . However they were all 30 something not 50 something.
How About Fried Green Tomatoes? It’s great to see Kathy Bates as she changes and grows more self-aware and self-confident. I thought it was great to watch her husband trying to figure out how to handle her.
And although she doesn’t get much older in this film, and she’s definitely not funny, I liked J.Lo in Enough. I’ve known battered women; and I realize that in real life the probability of the film ending as it did is less than 1%. However, I was rooting for her all the way. I think she develops an enormous amount of mental as well as physical strength to solve her problem for good.
Yes for Fried Green Tomatoes! ALL the women characters in that amazing film are examples of one type of excellent role model or another.
How about Mama Mia, The Family Stone, On Golden Pond, The First Wives Club. I love movies. I get to watch whatever I want on Fri nights because my guys (husband and son) are gone for the evening so I usually pick something they wouldn’t want to watch. So, keep them coming, I’ll have lots to watch on Fri nights through the summer. There’s absolutely nothing but garbage on TV.
I agree about the trash on TV…and they are making us pay to watch it by making impossible to get a channel unless you have a dish or cable. What really infuriates me, is all the informercials late at night. We are paying for these people to promote their businesses! What a piece of crock.
Yes, I agree. Remember when cable tv first came out and we bought it so we wouldn’t have to watch commecials. Now, there are more commercials on cable tv than true programs. except for PBS.
Oh I so disagree with the garbage on tv! Watch the genuine, strong female characters on Friday Night Lights. GO Tammi! Or Kyra Sedgwick as The Closer as she commands respect while trying to figure out who she is even though she is not someone’s mommy. There are many more…but give these few a try and I think you will see.
Thank you for your response…sometimes we do have to dig to find the top quality. Your point is well taken and adds a another dimension to the issue
Living Out Loud with Holly Hunter, Danny DeVito and Queen Latifah. Holly Hunter plays a 40-ish woman whose husband has an affair and leaves her for this woman. Hunter has to learn how to be on her own, meet new friends, be an individual, fight loneliness, decide what she wants to be when she grows up, etc. It’s funny and quirky and one of my favorite movies of all time.
Wow…I have found a great way to get fantastic movie recommendations! I am going to submit this blog every few months…just kidding but thank you for your responses.
You reminded me of so many of my other favorites and named some new ones for me to seek out
I am sorry if I offended anyone with the term “chic”
I don’t find it at all derogatory or age based…happy to still be a chick at almost 60. But i do like the suggestion of a contest to rename the genre…i will get back to you all on that one.
Thank you again…I am signing into Netflix right now!
I’d like to add “WAITING TO EXHALE” with Angela Bassett, absolutely one of my favorite actresses and so beautiful! She plays her part superbly. Along with Loretta Devine and Whitney Houston. I love the sisterhood portrayed within this movie, the support and caring they have for eachother. It is a story of women’s strength and determination. I found the book at a VC firm in San Francisco and began to read it on my lunch hour. I couldn’t put it down. When the movie came out, I couldn’t wait to see it. Great Chick flick and no, I’m not offended. Gotta see it!
I’ve watched this movie at least 100 times! It is sad, funny, happy, enlightening, entertaining, to say the least, and so real and true. It is MUST see.
Two more for the list:
Under the Tuscan Sun: her wisdom comes when she is told that everything she wanted is what she had. It just wasn’t the way she had thought it would be.
Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day: A fluffy film but just encourages us to accept what we are but go ahead and risk remaking ourselves if we want to. I just might would out.
Under the Tuscan Sun is one of my favorites too. I watch it when I feel like my life is a little out of control. Plus the scenery is gorgeous.
Calendar Girls, It’s Complicated and Something’s Gotta Give are all great too. I can’t wait to watch some of the other movies suggested here. Thanks!
Absolutely – Under the Tuscan Sun – watch it for the same reasons – but oh how I want to visit Italy every time I see that movie. Also liked “As Good As It Gets” with Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt. Laws of Attraction – Pierce Brosnan. (Makes me want to travel to Ireland). Guess I need to travel more is what it all points to – lol.
I agree with all the films listed above and would like to add one, called NOT DEAD YET. It’s about three middle-aged actresses who join forces to revive their careers only to find themselves on a journey far more profound. Perhaps I should mention that I wrote and produced it, but then again I am over 50 myself and feel I have a right to.
It’s won 2 best feature awards at the four festival’s it screened at and features David Ogden Stiers and Seymour Cassel. notdeadyetthefilm.com
How about MammaJammaMovies? Silly but, oh well..
I also LOVE the ones mentioned…Jack Nicholson said he could NEVER believe any woman would pick him over Keanu. When the man is right he is RIGHT!
If You have not seen MY BRILLIANT CAREER with a yummy Sam Neill and a 20 something Judy Davis you MUST do so ASAP!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079596/
I will check it out and put a link to it from my fiftyfab.com website…if you would like. I am always happy to hightlight the great work of 50+ females
I went to the website and saw the trailer!!! I WANT TO SEE THIS MOVIE!!! But WHERE???
In addition to Shirley Valentine, which I first saw with my best friend many years ago, I really like FROZEN RIVER, a heartbreaking story about a tough woman, love, sacrifice, family, friendship, and finally – hope.
The Contest is On! Rename the “chick flick” genre
In response to some of your suggestions I am offering to organize a contest to rename the film genre “Chick Flicks”
The genre is one which includes films to which we don’t take our male mates or as Gigi of seven put it so well below , a chick flick is one described as “Leave your husband at home for this one!”
It was suggested in this thread that chick flick was old fashioned and demeaning…so lets come up with a new name e.g. Cinema Estrogenera ( that is not an entry just an example)
In support of a fellow author who is also blogging here on VN…I will offer a copy of Dr Diller’s book, Face It as a prize for this contest.
All you have to do to enter:
How does that sound…you need to encourage lots of other folks to enter too
I like it – EXCEPT that I think men SHOULD see these films with us. They could learn some things or the films could at least serve as the basis for some conversation about some topics that might be good to explore with each other.
There are no rules…you can bring along a guy to a chick flick or whatever we will call it.
I like to see them witha girlfriend and then torture my hubby by describing it all to him when I get home. I can turn a 90 minute film into a 3 hour description
Hi, Jaki,
Thanks to all of you who responded to my request to delete from our vocabulary the demeaning term “chick flick.”
My suggestion for the new genre is “cinema ying-yang.” Maybe that is because I just saw the new Karate Kid which featured enough rough and tumble to keep the boys interested, and enough gentility and courtesy to draw in both sexes. It was a great hand-holding movie.
All my best and thank you.
MarinaMarina
Time to vote: we only have two entries…but I will stay true to my word and offer the prize based on the votes
To vote respond to this posting indicatint your choice for
1. Menomovie or 2. cinema ying-yang
I will wait one week for responses
Menomovie
The Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood was not mentioned. We picked this movie to watch on our “Girls” sleepover. What fun!! Lots of food and wine and the craziest pajamas we could come up with. We are planning another one when Julia Roberts movie comes out. If you haven’t had one try it with close friends on a weekend when husband is off fishing or on a business trip.
Didi
Our Red Hat Society – Ya Yas – yes, the same are having a sleepover Friday to celebrate our July Birthdays at a home with the sound of a creek nearby. The selection of movies will come in handy to make our choice. Some movies such as Bonneville are “listed” by the Red Hats, and we attend the movie as a group… Our hostess will surprise us with fun ideas, and I have a pair of PJs with Red Hats all over them. Let the party began – food and wine sound good!!
Diane
Hello Everyone, I read the entire posts and responses for this topic and I think I came up with a better name for ‘chick flicks’ for women 50+. Wait for it…….drum roll please…..ta da….
‘MenoMovie’ What do you think?
Hey MoonStruck–This is good if you are in-meno. However, many of us are beyond that now. Perhaps that word could work– “Beyond…..”.
Good point…please offer your suggestion for the meno and beyond flick genre
from,
one who is also beyond and still sweating
That is good – the first thing I thought of when I saw this was no men….
Menomovie is our first official contest entry…thank you
My all time favorite is Waiting to Exhale. After a major breakup in 2006 that left me immobilized for months I must have watched this movie 100 times. The characters became my best friends. The Angela Bassett breakup with her husband still brings me to tears as I watch it today because it was exactly the way I was feeling and wanted to do to my ex. SUPERB!
It isn’t a movie, but I am enjoying the new tv show “Hot in Cincinatti”. So far, it is clever, more geared towards women past the age of 40, and who doesn’t love Betty White? Worth watching.
What network is this TV show on??
As for a name for instead of chick flicks how about: SASSY WOMAN FILMS
Just a thought LOL
ooops I think you meant Hot in Cleveland
Yes to Fried Green Tomatoes, but how about that other cafe, Baghdad Cafe? A couple of excellent actresses, Marianne Sägebrecht and C. C. H. Pounder, go head-to-head in this strong, funny movie. And yes to The Closer, one of the best-ever portrayals of a strong, smart, funny flawed woman on TV.
I love Fried Green Tomatoes! OK…Here is a good one that we saw with some friends and I do not think that anyone in the theater was under 50+. “Mrs Palfrey at The Clairemont” with Joan Plowright….I will always love the Grumpy Old Men movies…And one of my favorites is “Always” with Holly Hunter, Richard Dreyfuss, and John Goodman. Also “The Mirror Has Two Faces” with Barbra Streisand and Jeff Bridges. And finally “Chances Are” with Robert Downey Jr, Cybil Shepherd, and Ryan O’Neil. The TV series “Parenthood” is pretty good.
Has anyone besides me seen Enchanted April? It is a small budget movie that follows four women who rent an Italian villa for a month and escape from their humdrum lives. It is rather slow moving but will leave you with the same feeling that a good body massage will give you. Luscious!
Well it seems the contest idea did not work..soory but we did get some great new movie suggestions.
Thank you for the 3 suggested new genre titles. I think the other readers loved them all and that is why no one would vote
Take care and hope to see you all again soon on another blog site
I love the movie Fried Green Tomatoes! Kathy Bates is sensational as a midlife woman discovering herself, friendship, and how to maneuver the rocky road of menopause. My favorite scene is in the grocery store parking lot when she repeatedly rams the VW and says to the young women “Face it, I’m older and have more insurance!” Love it!
I realize as you and others list this movie, that I need to re watch it. I watched it years ago with my mother and loved it. Kathy Bates is definitely up there on my list of 50+ women to admire.
I am reading this thread as part of the best of 2010 wrap up so my comment is a bit late. I wanted to suggest that these movies be called “Movies for Grown-ups” and not be limited to movies only for or about women. I’m interested in anything related to being at the grown up end of life. Also AARP publishes suggested movies once a year, and they have some good titles.