The other night, I attended a book review and one of the topics we discussed was nourishing the soul. The guest speaker, a lovely young lady, used a candle as an example of how the wick is useless without the wax…comparing the connection between our body and soul.
I immediately thought of my beloved Mother, whose body became totally disabled after a decade of battling Parkinson’s disease. This beautiful brilliant woman spent the last few years of her life curled up in the fetal position, dependent on everyone else for her survival. Through the years, her visitors dwindled.
I believe that my Mother’s soul was not nourished because her body failed her and she felt useless. People no longer valued her opinion or were mesmerized by her magnetic personality. I watched the flame extinguished in her eyes. On 2-14-86 I wrote in my journal: I love you so much …We exchange thoughts with our eyes…You are telling me the time has come..to say our goodbyes.
Every day I think of my Mother and how much I miss her. Every day I pray that the world will learn compassion for the disabled. Though their bodies may have failed them, they deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.
They deserve to have their souls nourished with our love.
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i use a combo of shea butter and aloe vera moisturizer. Works great. I use shea butter on my lips, around my eyes and nose (dry areas), My father swears by vasoline.
p.s. I dropped your name on Gina's post, Barb. ;)
I sat with my mother, grandmother and grandfather during their final weeks. Dad died suddenly so I was not able to be with him. My heart aches for the pain and frustration of their passing. Grand dad had battled cancer twice, by the last few weeks he had lost his ability to speak or move, he had always been a robust vibrant man full of joy and patience. Grandma ( both of them) were patient and a well spring of inspiration for me. Grandma Dora did beautiful embroidery, quilts and had a garden that would make produce section managers green. Grandma Ada also did beautiful needlework and crochet, I loved sitting by her rocking chair listening to her talk. Mom and I were opposites and there were many lively discussions. She was unconscious most of the last twenty four hours, Grandma Ada was unable to even feed herself at the end, on good days she knew her family…… Grandma Dora was taken from the house by ambulance while I was at school. This week I have been sitting in ICU beside a friend/colleague of twenty five years who suffered a cardiac arrest a week ago. Sometimes she is cognizant some times she holds conversations with air…… I answer as best I can other times I just hold her hand. I know she is tired, frustrated and confused. It hurts to see her frustrated, it is disheartening to see the confusion that no one seems to be able to do anything about. We ( her family and friends) have been putting together a video picture frame. It has uplifting music, pictures of her grand babies, her kids and family /friends. Thought during the times they kick us out of ICU if she wakes there would at least be a friendly face looking back. I do not know if she will make it. I have not seen much nourishing in the care. Care for the immediate physical but nothing for the mental and spiritual. Perhaps that is where our current system fails so many. I agree that family and friends are a substantial part of the nourishing but what of the care givers? Her day nurse talks to her, jokes with her whether or not she responds I do not see that with her evening or night nurses they act as though the woman laying there is a mannequin. Maybe it speaks to society’s obsession with youth and physical perfection, rather than the beautiful soul encased within.
Thank-you for your thoughts. I agree with so much of what you shared! You sound like a wonderful, caring human being!
I am a caregiver for a man with parkinsons. He’s 91 years old. It seems he’s just waiting to die as he mentioned several times. He’s to feeble to do anything except to read the paper, watch TV and nap all day in his recliner. His mind is sound, his body isn’t.
My heart breaks for him! Please give him a hug from me!