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Coaches on the Edge are not feeling Zen-sational.

elizabeth: I am embarrassed to say that Buddha might be gunning for me for being superficial and judgmental. I feel really bad about it but I am just a student and have a long way to go. And if finding nirvana is anything like school, God knows I will be wearing out my  welcome at the foot of Buddha.

 Laurie:  Oh great.  I can smell the incense burning now.

 elizabeth:  I bought a CD on Buddhism about a year ago. Not wanting to jump into it – I left it around the house. I let it gather dust so it started to feel right at home. Last week I finally slid it into the CD player. That’s when things started to go downhill. Inner peace. But at what price?

 Laurie:  Bring it over.  Maybe it can mate with my yoga CD’s.  They must be getting lonely.  Good intentions pave the road to dusty CD’s (yeah, you can quote me on that).  I always forget that I live in a New York City apartment.  Although more spacious than most, I still do not have the room to jump in front of a television, stretch my body out to its stately 62 inches, and not wrench my neck trying to get the television screen in sight of vision.

 elizabeth: Most of the teachers on the CD (not including Richard Gere who looked just fine) were addressed as Venerable George or Robina. I didn’t like that. Nobody is going to use a different name for old on me. Slip #1. The women had no hair or makeup. I knew that coming in. But what about a little blush? Does being one with the universe mean not looking ones best? Slip #2.  Then one of the venerable teachers starts gesturing with her hand and I spot the jiggling of her upper arm.  I started to worry about spring coming and will I be showing off taut arms or will long sleeves work in 98 degree weather. Slip #3. What’s on Oprah today?

 Laurie:  Darling, if you were truly zenning it, Mr. Gere wouldn’t be titillating your tepid brain cells.  And aren’t your eyes supposed to be closed anyway?  Or at least rolling back in your head in a euphoric state of blissful blankness?

elizabeth: I do think that beneath my glossy lips, my painted nails, my smoky eyes and my need to be current with fashion there is a spiritual babe just begging to come out.  So I am going to go back and try watching the CD yet again. And if the lack of makeup and jiggling gets to be too much, I will give into my superficial self and put on an 80’s dance CD and let the spirit move me that way. Does anyone know if the Flock of Seagulls are Buddhists?

Laurie:  I don’t even know what the Flock of Seagulls are – period.  But there’s much I don’t know about 80’s dance music, and that’s okay with me.  I suspect if we were really as cool as we think we are, Buddha would be on our iPod and we would doing yoga on Wii.

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  1. Generic Image Kim V says

    You get what you put in. Superficial into it, superficial returns. As for what’s on Oprah, just another make over that most people can’t afford, or favorite things (that would blow one month’s food budget.) My suggestion is to find a group, in person, and start that way. There are many groups for free or start your own and learn to meditate and do simple poses and gather support through your learning journey.You can learn to meditate by yourself, I suggest this simple easy read book by Shakti Gawain, “Creative Visualization” And/or”How to meditate” by Lawrence Leshan.His book is a bit more meaty than Shakti’s, both are designed for starters. You don’t need to be cool to be at peace. If that were a true requirement I wouldn’t have bothered with any of this.

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