Vibrant Nation

Win a copy of My Formerly Hot Life

Posted on Friday, August 13, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Coaches on the Edge just got a peek into the new book "My Formerly Hot Life: Dispatches From Just the Other Side of Young,” and we would like to answer some of the questions posed in a  New York Times interview with Formerly Hot author, Stephanie Dolgoff.

 So what happens when you're no longer a Formerly? (The Coaches on the Edge have no good answer for that. Why are you looking at us like that?).

Eat, Pray, Love: Our version of Elizabeth Gilbert’s bestseller

Posted on Monday, August 09, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: The movie, Eat, Pray, Love, based on Elizabeth  Gilbert’s bestselling memoir (for those of you have been living off the planet for a few years) is coming to a movie theatre near you this Friday. I, for one, am excited. A good friend and I are meeting up on the upper West Side of Manhattan for lunch and a serving of Eat, Pray, Love.

 I think so many women wished they could have run away and penned this book – minus the early bathroom scenes. Hell, I would have been happy to have taken a year long trek to …okay, I am feeling the love and just ate so I won’t mention the state, but you know where you are located. I just want to get the hell out of my office

Bet you don't have a Hallmark card for this one

Posted on Thursday, July 08, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Last year on my birthday my seventeen-year-old nephew killed himself. Finding a card for this occasion is going to be damn near impossible.

Coaches on the Edge and the Rock of the Aged Stars. The Face Off.

Posted on Friday, July 02, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Every once in a while I go on the Internet and look at pictures of rock stars that I dreamt about sleeping with. Or at least getting my picture taken with them so I could make up some smoldering stories about some tawdry nights I spent with them. Good Catholic girl  lying through her teeth shit.  I was a kid with an imagination that could rival Steven Spielberg, George Lucas and James Cameron.     Somehow I don’t think we shared the same fantasies. I couldn’t have taken the competition.

10 tips to save your sanity while working at home

Posted on Friday, June 11, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

When the time comes to work at home, please follow these fool-proof tips. I can’t speak for Laurie, but this fool didn’t and now I wish I had a fairy god mama that would have pointed me in the right direction. Coaches on the Edge Fairy Dust is now available for $9.99 plus $0.09 S&H. Just send the checks to my house. Laurie doesn’t need to know.

Coaches on the Edge to be on the Cover of O Magazine. Week 26.

Posted on Wednesday, May 19, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson Coaches on the Edge are celebrating an anniversary also. It has been 26 weeks since we started our blog about being on the cover of O. A half year where we have made Wednesdays the day we let the world know that we are going to be on the cover of your magazine. You got to believe, right?

Coaches on the Edge turn 100

Posted on Wednesday, May 19, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Okay, maybe we’re lying and our collective ages are 100…or maybe not. Actually this is our 100th blog. That’s a lot of ranting and raving, and God bless you, that’s a lot of reading. So why do we mark things in hundred’s?

If the bra fits and other lies we were told

Posted on Friday, April 30, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson These annoying mammary mashers in the front and those “back fat” strappy devices can turn me from a nice, genteel woman into a close relative of Joan Crawford, only I am on a crack cocaine drip and sleep deprived.

Can immodesty lead to earthquakes? What are you smoking?

Posted on Thursday, April 29, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson Earthquakes seem to be occurring every week or so and in devastating intensity. Yes, Al Gore will attribute this to Global Warming, but I believe Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi has uncovered the real culprit — Slutty Women.

Being banned by the Coaches on the Edge

Posted on Sunday, April 18, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I bought a shower cap the other day. Have been holding unto a plastic one from a hotel in Venice for years because I didn’t think they sold them anymore. They do and the one I bought has writings and flowers on it and ruffles that go around your head. I started to believe that one does not have to wash their hair everyday – it’s the shampoo companies that piled on the guilt.

Wondering if bullying and suicides are replacing reading and writing in our schools.

Posted on Monday, April 12, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Phoebe Prince and her family came to this country looking for their piece of our American Dream. I just hope our American Dream does not include being bullied to the point of taking one’s life. For the Prince family, it is exactly what their American nightmare is all about now.

Coaches on the Edge are Getting Fired

Posted on Monday, April 05, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: I came upon The Apprentice while channel surfing the other night. Yes, females channel surf also. Almost stars and has-been stars and obscure stars had been divided based on gender and were battling it out in the name of charity. The task was to run a diner in Manhattan and solicit donations for a charity. The team who got the most donations won. In truth, I’m not sure what they won. Obviously the money donated would go charity, but if there were any other prizes to be had, they must have been announced in the first hour which I fortunately missed.

Coaches on the Edge to be on Cover of O Magazine – Week 19

Posted on Monday, April 05, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: As I write this, Oprah’s show is in repeats. Riveting repeats to watch again and then there is the one show that started it all. Ellen gets on the cover of O Magazine show. I see it on Oprah’s site. Ellen and her wife Portia are guests (again)and they look so happy. It is either because Ellen got to be the first non-Oprah person to be on the cover of O or is it because Portia has on a pair of very hot looking boots. I wondered if they come in my size.

Never say never

Posted on Monday, March 15, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Never say never. I sat on a wooden porch somewhere in Baroda, India, and watched a peacock stroll by with full plumage unfurled. A couple of “saints-in-training” clad in orange togas were sitting in the trees to provide spiritual support. We were on a guru’s ayurvedic farm during monsoon season, and I had plenty of time to contemplate what the heck I was doing there.

You can forgive but you don't have to forget

Posted on Thursday, March 04, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: There are those people who are easy to hate and deserve our fury. Hitler, Idi Amin, Charles Manson and his buddy Ted Bundy   and my third grade teacher Mrs. Kaplan who tried to leave me back a grade. You get what I am saying – people who hurt a few to a few million to a young girl who was so full of fear of being called a dummy by her classmates and the general public. Hate… that when you say it, it almost becomes three dimensional and the smoke that rises from it sometimes blinds us. And sometimes it gives us 20/20.

Coaches on the Edge to get on the cover of O Magazine. Week 15

Posted on Thursday, March 04, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Laurie, did you hear that our friend Oprah (we are all children of the universe so I feel comfortable  calling her a friend until she elevates us to “special girlfriends”) is having an unauthorized biography coming out about her in April 2010. The Times of London reported that “Oprah’s life is next in celebrity ‘poison pen’ biography club.” So you know that can only be the feline fabricator, Kitty Kelley, who penned this work. I think we would like to let Ms. Winfrey know that we are at the ready with our Sharpies to black out anything that smacks of an untruth towards our next best buddy, Oprah.

Coaches on the Edge to get on the Cover of O Magazine. Week 14

Posted on Wednesday, February 24, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Okay, Valentine’s Day is over. Although we didn’t hear from you, we realize that you were probably out buying cars for all your staff in honor of the day devoted to red gifts. And Coaches on the Edge are not about to take being ignored personally. Instead we will renew our plea

Coaches on the Edge to get on the cover of O Magazine. Week 13. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Posted on Tuesday, February 16, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Red ribbons, gooey chocolates, lace, and mushy cards – do we want this for Valentine’s Day? Heck no! What would get our blood boiling, our hearts thumping, and our asses in gear to drop those damn extra pounds would be that call from Oprah’s people saying “Yes, you can be on the cover of O Magazine!”

I want a job where I'm expected to be incorrect!

Posted on Tuesday, February 16, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: I wanna be a weatherwoman. I think the fancy name is meteorologist, but whatever you call me, I would have a job where I would be expected to be incorrect. How cool is that? I could say whatever I want, pick a bogus percentage to boost my forecast, and still be considered an expert no matter how many times I am wrong. A big snow storm, maybe the biggest ever to reign down on the world, was supposed to hit Manhattan this weekend

Coaches on the Edge are not feeling Zen-sational.

Posted on Wednesday, February 10, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I am embarrassed to say that Buddha might be gunning for me for being superficial and judgmental. I feel really bad about it but I am just a student and have a long way to go. And if finding nirvana is anything like school, God knows I will be wearing out my welcome at the foot of Buddha.

We're taking over: Get ready for the New World Order

Posted on Monday, February 08, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I am tired with how the world is being run. I think most of the people in charge of this planet are working at a disadvantage… thinking with their butts only. Everybody seems to be mean-spirited and self-indulgent and I have had it. As of today, I am taking over. Laurie, how about heading up the Department of Zingers (that you think elizabeth does not notice but does and is keeping track of all of them)? That might work out nicely. Ouch. I can tell from the sharp pain in my side that it might not be the exact title you desire – so we could be co- presidents of the world. All this togetherness.

How much mouth does your money buy?

Posted on Saturday, February 06, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: NFL Journeyman (wonder what the heck that is?) Paul Shirley recently wrote an article (yep, he put it in writing) about why he wasn’t giving one red cent to Haiti. He explained that he wasn’t sure his money would be put to good use. Would they build hurricane/earthquake resistant structures to protect themselves for the future disasters that will probably follow the weary-worn path to Haiti?

Coaches on the Edge to be on the cover of O Magazine. Week 12.

Posted on Saturday, February 06, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Happy Birthday Oprah. What a day that must have been for you. Caught your show and congratulations on your new puppies. My brother and his family just got two Cavalier King Charles Spaniels – Sammy and Riley. I think Sunny and Lauren would like a playdate with them. We can bring them to the photo shoot for the cover of O Magazine. But I think my six cats and yellow lab may have something to say if they don’t get on the cover. Something like, “I know you loved that sofa but now no one can sit on it.”

A plea to dignity: Come out, come out wherever you are

Posted on Monday, February 01, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

 elizabeth: Big news the other day. Some sports jock wants to supply Haiti with condoms, and Elizabeth Edwards has left her husband, former presidential candidate John Edwards. I hate dumb jocks so I will stay with the Elizabeth Edwards exit. I think everyone is going to have an opinion on this, and the only opinion that really matters is Elizabeth’s. I think this is nobody’s damn business, and when I read or hear news like this, I am glad and saddened that I will never ever run for office.

A day in the life of the Coaches on the Edge

Posted on Thursday, January 28, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I went to feed our dog in the sunroom. I saw something on the floor and I tapped it. It moved. On its own. It was a bee. A bee in January? Last week I stepped on something and it stung me. It was a bee. In January. I dropped the pile of newspapers on it. End of bee in  January. And no, I could not put it outside. It was too cold for it to survive. So a friend calls and I tell her what happened. Are you sure it was a bee? You can’t have bees in January. It couldn’t have been a bee.  Oh really Einstein? When I am hallucinating, bees rarely show up. Double-headed dragons that devour people that ask questions like that do make an appearance. We made lunch plans. The dragons are driving.

Is falling down on the job contagious?

Posted on Thursday, January 28, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: What I am thinking is when does the brain just shut down due to stupidity? And what science research project can I sign up for   where I help administer the tests? Don’t you catch people saying and doing stupid stuff, and hours later you find yourself riding by their house because you just want to go and flog them? I am not talking about brain freeze due to ice cream consumption – you can’t really fault a person when that happens. I know because it has happened to me.

Coaches on the Edge to be on the cover of O Magazine. Week 11

Posted on Thursday, January 28, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I know the news about the bad boys of Late Night TV has over shadowed one very important news item: Coaches on the Edge to meet with Oprah to scout locations for the O cover that will feature the three of them. Oprah suggested her living room in CA, I have requested a Tuscan vineyard and Laurie is fine with the 8th Avenue entrance to Madison Square Garden.

Men behaving badly and the women who lust after them

Posted on Thursday, January 21, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson Men Behaving Badly and the Women who Lust after Them. The Coaches on the Edge need a cold compress and a copy of Ms Magazine.

If you were granted three wishes...

Posted on Monday, January 18, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I woke up with what felt like a white wine hangover. You know how you think you are spacing them and then you wake up with some guy’s underwear on your head. No? Never been that way? Me either. My face will adjust to the longer nose; isn’t that right, Geppetto? We got to be careful what we wish for. So I decided I needed three wishes to be granted. Some can occur in this lifetime and some can be realized in another life when all the planets line up. What the hell does that mean anyway?

Coaches on the Edge have a dream too – to be on the cover of O Magazine

Posted on Wednesday, January 13, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Oprah, January is a time of dreams.  We’re getting ready to celebrate the day of one of the most   influential Black leaders of all  times, and Martin Luther King Jr. was proud to proclaim that he had a dream.  Granted, his dream was for the betterment of all man/womankind but can you blame a couple of New York City chicks for dreaming about their futures?  Dreams have to start somewhere, you know.

Coaches on the Edge with their money honey

Posted on Tuesday, January 12, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: I’ve got a sister that pushes my buttons like no other human being walking around this earth, been dating/marrying/whatever  since I was twelve, sometimes find myself the bridge between Southern and Italian relatives, have introduced different cultures to my  friends and family on a regular basis

Who you gonna call? Logic or Intuition

Posted on Thursday, January 07, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: I think I am a relatively sane person (elizabeth, wait your turn!), but please don’t ask me to think about how I think. My brain shuts off completely – too much input. I just got back from a conference where one of the hot topics was the neuroscience of the brain. Good grief! Whatever that means, folks were signing up for that session like crazy.

Coaches on the Edge to be on the cover of O Magazine – Week 8

Posted on Thursday, January 07, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Well, now that the major winter holidays are over and I have returned that bronze bust of Elvis that goes with nada in my house or in my universe, it is time to turn our attention back to getting Coaches on the Edge on the cover of O Magazine. I like to look at it as if this it is our mission from God. It worked for John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd in the Blues Brothers and I am betting it will work for us. Plus we are cuter. Not by a lot, but we’ll take it.

Resurrection: What 2009 celebrity death would you reverse?

Posted on Wednesday, January 06, 2010 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Last year I wrote my own blog on whom I would bring back from the dead in 2008. This year Laurie and I are putting together our own list on who we would bring back in 2009. There are the names that might jump out at us – Ted Kennedy, Michael Jackson, Walter Cronkite, Naomi Sims and Farrah Fawcett but there were many who gave much and received a lot less attention.

Happy New Year, Oprah! We are ready for our close up

Posted on Tuesday, December 29, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Oprah, think about it.  Wouldn’t you like to start the New Year out right?  Or at least without a weekly begging blog from Coaches on the  Edge?  The solution is in your perfectly-manicured, all-powerful hands.  Just put us on your cover, and these weekly nuisances will become a fond memory.

Let's talk about sex, baby!

Posted on Tuesday, December 29, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: Today I heard that 40% of teenagers having sex have not had “that talk” with their parents. You know about sex, teenage pregnancy,  STDS, AIDS, the sort of things that could stop a young life in its tracks. 40%. So I guess that means that those of us who are not parents will have to give “the talk” right here and now.  Well, maybe as soon as we get our info straight.

End of year regrets and resolutions

Posted on Tuesday, December 29, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Let’s get right to it. I said I would do a couple of things last year on January 1st, and here it is the end of the  year and they remain undone.

Last minute holiday thoughts from the minds of Santa’s two favorite elves

Posted on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: It’s a rainy night in Manhattan, and I’m tired of wrapping Christmas gifts.  All my addictive reality shows have concluded – a tearful Danny is The Biggest Loser, the blonde couple who always came in first won The Amazing Race, and even Tyra isn’t torturing young skinny girls into becoming top models (although you can almost always find a rerun of America’s Next Top Model somewhere). What to do?

Coaches on the Edge to be on the cover of O Magazine. The saga continues

Posted on Saturday, December 19, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

Laurie: Okay, Oprah, if your goal was to send the entire world into shock, you succeeded. The announcement of
your retirement in two years has rippled through the media and brought great moaning and groaning into the public sector. But Coaches on the Edge feel this is an excellent opportunity to implore you to put us on your cover.

Coaches on the Edge to be on O's magazine cover

Posted on Wednesday, December 16, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: So we have not lost our minds (you can’t lose what you don’t have), but Ellen Degeneres  got herself on the cover of O. And Ellen is blond, very funny and married to the very beautiful Portia De Rossi. I am blond, people say I make them chuckle and my wife has a beard and goes by the name of Walter

Younger men vs older men. Is there really a contest?

Posted on Wednesday, December 16, 2009 by Elizabeth Cassidy & Laurie Lawson

elizabeth: I hate, despise and resent the term “cougar.” Hate it with a passion. I googled to find out who came up with this asinine label, and this was their answer: Late 80's in the dressing room of the Vancouver Canucks Hockeyteam, they called older single women that came to their games cougars. Okay, now I have to boycott Vancouver