This morning I opened my daily inspirational to read “Never turn down a job just because you think it’s too small; you don’t know where it can lead”. Julia Morgan.
For many of us work is still an important part of what we have to do. Income is essential. We have no choice. We have to live.
But sometimes life throws a curve ball and you’re left feeling that you wish you had a catcher’s mitt. That’s how I felt 25 years ago when I held my newborn Son and decided to stay at home with him. To make it possible I opened up a home-daycare and ran that for four years. I had another child and stayed home for another two years after that, living by selling antiques/collectibles at weekend markets and shows. Then I decided to go back to having a regular job. Nobody would hire me – I didn’t have current experience.
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I found out that the school my kids were going to needed a lunch-hour coordinator and I found myself managing a team of ladies who supervised the children. I ran a good program and one of the Mom’s came to me to ask me if I knew of anyone who could clean her house. I decided to do it myself. Word got around school and I found myself with enough requests that it soon became a full time job. As some jobs went away others took their place; I even began to do personal service work with seniors. Often a home maintenance issue might come along and being handy with tools I’d offer my services. I’ve done painting, plumbing, plastering, and a number of other fix-it jobs. I’ve even got asked for pet care and I have one canine client four days a week – the result of getting to know people in my neighborhood. I enjoy a good reputation for being a good all-purpose home maintenance person. Many of my clients have entrusted their parents to me. I’m a one-woman domestic service agency – well 2 actually since I recently took on a partner.
25 years ago when I held that little boy I unconsciously began to make a decision tree. I wanted more than work on my terms, I wanted it to be environmentally friendly, I wanted to make a difference in other people’s lives that was wholesome, and I didn’t want to dress up or do things that made my feet hurt – like high heels. I wanted to be the one who decides what I’m worth.
Looking now I can almost laugh at the audacity that propelled me into the world of those who are self-employed. I had no capital, no qualifications and no training for many of the things I’ve done. I just learned it as I went along.
Hindsight is better than foresight, or so they say. Looking back I see something important – I gave myself permission to do what made me happy. I like looking after folks.
I don’t want to work ever again as someone’s employee, which is unlikely to happen. I enjoy the freedom to pick my own clients and run my own business. I’ve become confident and strong as the result of the decision I made 25 years ago. What we chose has a way of coming back to haunt us – not always in a bad way – networking comes naturally to me.
Many a time my friends have come to me for advice on being self-employed. My advice is always the same – Do what you love and love what you do. The only new thing I would add to the list is plan for it. Even if your plan doesn’t work out the way you planned you’ll likely realize some success if you apply yourself. But to make self-employment work you first have to shrug off the myth that you are better off employed by someone else.
I have a plan for the next stage of my life, or when physical work gets to be too much, but that is another story. For now it’s enough to know that plan will unfold as I go along.
They say “good things come in small packages”. That is how I see my clients. They are not the sum total of my work – just small parcels of it done up with independence.
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Making money isn’t that hard. It’s what goes on in your head when you get up in the morning that is difficult. I no longer curse getting dressed the way I did when I was 27. I’m not afraid that one asshole can take away my job. I’m secure in what I do. And I’m laughing all the way to the bank.
I still think fondly of those days when I was an EA. I learned how to talk like a business person. I learned how to negotiate. I learned how to have a business discussion. And most importantly, I learned how to make decisions. Those days were an apprenticeship.
Looking back on my work history in my rather less than illustrious jobs I feel some pride. I did more than endure. I evolved.
What is at the base of your decision tree about work?
Keep the relationship as it is and it will continue to work just fine. My thought is the experiment of changing anything will create a different relationship that may not work as well.
There are so many pluses to the way it is. No confrontat
Hi there, I don't want to sound harsh but, I have to say that if you are 47 and he is 22 , hard for me to believe that you're getting any satisfaction. Can you please explain what is it that you like about him? you should think about it in a more 
Being in the same business as you, and doing some of the same services that you do, I feel the same way. I could never work for anyone again. I have in the past and no way, would I ever go that route again.
I have respect, my customers trust me, like me, do many nice things for me, and the feelings are mutual. I respect them also. I work for professionals. Lawyers, well known and wealthy musicians, Doctors, Psychiatrists, Bankers, ect. I have worked for many interesting people in my 20 some years doing this. Wouldn’t change it for the world……
Hello She Cat! My goodness, it’s good to hear from another home service provider. It’s the cat’s pajamas to hear someone write of this work with respect. You obviously have good reasons to be successful, being hard working, responsible, reliable and talented, etc. but I’m told by the Mom of one of my clients that “housekeepers are cut from a special cloth”. How true is that?? What kind of cloth is that – something durable but capable of fashion – maybe denim?
Denim would be my choice, as it’s the only thing I like to wear…….It’s an honest job, it pays the bills, and I am respected and trusted. Many times in the past 20+ years, people have had me move into their homes while they were away for months on end, and I took care of their homes, and animals. I still do it to this day, just not as long of time periods.
I love my job, and at the end of the day, I am tired and then very thankful when Friday rolls around.. LOL!!!!!
Yea, there is a lot to be said for Friday. I look after my friend Jane’s place and when she is away and it’s like a vacation from my hubby for a while. I definately think we got a denim thing going on here. My blue jeans and jean jacket get worn more than anything else, at least while it’s warm enough. Living in Toronto one gets to wear denim quite a bit because we have spring and fall and even cool days in summer. Last summer was the hardest time I’ve had so far – but fortunately most of my customers have a/c. It was wicked to be moving about quickly when the air felt like warm pea soup! Some of my seniors don’t like to get cold so they don’t turn on their air conditioners and they want to serve me hot tea! Of course I drink it, and eat some cookies, too. The arrival of the housekeeper can be a major social event . . .
I tried to post this before and it didn’t work. Try again.
I said I thought you were an amazing woman. Confident, not afraid to get your hands dirty, independent, smart AND wise, making the most of the present, accepting and learning from the past and ready for whatever the future might bring. The word that comes to mind is SERENE. You strike me as a serene being. And as a teacher. Both by your example and your writing. Thanks. MM
Wow, thank you Martha Maria. It was the Damitol that gave you that impression!! Just kidding. I have done some teaching. Taught as an enrichment instructor when I worked at the kids school. I taught art, cooking and drama. Ran into the Mom of one of my former students and he’s still using my recipe for potato soup after all these years!! As for writing there just seems to be a font in me that loves to communicate. Most of the time I’m at work, I’m alone so I really appreciate all the people in my life and I love to share. I’ve met awesome women on this site, you know there a lot to be said for this site. Think back to the days when communicating with anyone that wasn’t in your dailing area was an expensive long-distance call or snail mail. Now we can just plop own laptops down anywhere and talk to people all over the world! What a ride to live in this century, what a ride . . .thank you for your sweet words Martha Maria. I need the encouragement!
Excellent writing. For those who are considering self employment, I recommend a book I read years ago called Soloing by Harriet Rubin.
For me, I’m a govie so I have lots of bosses. I have another 10 years in this arena and then I can start to catch up to those wise women here who have already chosen to be their own boss.
Hello Dr.She! If you’ve got lots of bosses you’re a better man than I. I was only able to cope with one so I decided it had better be me ’cause I get along better with myself than anyone else. Why does this remind me of my doctor’s joke . . . I don’t know . . . but anyway my doctor put a patient of his on an anti-depressant and the patient came back and reported that he wasn’t feeling different but everyone else around him at work was acting much better!!! Thank you for your kind words, so nice to know you’re there when you pop up. I always feel like we’ve just had a cup of coffee together, or do you prefer tea?
Oh, by the way Dr.She I wanted to thank you for posting a good book reccomendation for the self-employed. I was actually hoping someone would. Lots of ladies here looking for work, you never know what piece of information you offer will be useful! I’ve marked this post so I can get a copy. I’m starting a new business in three years and I’ve been very keen lately on reading about self-employment. So thanks again, now I feel that the post is complete, sort of . . . if you know what I mean.
One boss/one soul….love it; doctor joke, love it.
Hazelnut coffee or Earl Grey tea and I feel as if I being highly spoiled! Add a little cheesecake with graham crust and I’m in heaven.
The book was a good one. It’s a few years old, but I enjoyed it and shared it with many of friends who were considering being their own boss. Here’s the amazon link: Used at 1 cent and New at 3 dollars:http://www.amazon.com/Soloing-Realizing-Your-Lifes-Ambition/dp/0066620147/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1289791792&sr=1-1