I feel so lonely,unhappy,emptyness,.all the time. I’am so blessed,good health as far as I know,never been to a doctor,other than having my son,he is now 32 years old.I have one grandson he is 13 years old,I have been married for 35 years to the same man,.we have a so so marriage,.sometimes I don’t know if I’m in love with him or in love with him,I’am faithfull to my husband,he is a good man,we have had our bad times in this marriage,but we have had our good times also.I don’t know what is going on in my life,I don’t feel like I belone anywhere.I don’t know what my perpose is,.I feel so so lonely all the time not much happiness,not much peace of mine,I make myself laugh,I pretend to be enjoying myself when I’m around others,I’m a christian,I love GOD,haven’t done anything in my life,.I just don’t know what is going on.I’am 52 years old,why am I feeling this way.
| emptyness,lonelyness | Hot Conversation |
August 12, 2010
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I used Noxzema from the time I was old enough to wash my own face, all through school and into adulthood. Then I decided it wasn't 'sophisticated' enough and went with higher priced, higher end products. About 5 years ago, I went back to 
How funny....i only very recently (within last week) read the coconut oil articles on the web. (100 uses, 80 uses etc.) so i bouht some and ordered some from amazon. (Im a stockpiler.)
Have started trying some of the uses. I tried using it a
If your going to be financially secure enough to venture out and see whats available in the B & B field...take your time and check it out. If you have to jump into a job..just to have one..you will not be happy. Hope you get the time to find wh
Please get a check up! Your thyroid/hormones could be out of whack. Also, sounds like depression to me. Please be evaluated by a good physician. Write down all your symptoms and feelings so when you’re there you make sure to cover everything. Find someone to talk to. Either a counselor, friend, or clergy. There is help out there.
I will add to that it sounds like it is time to develop some interests for yourself, whether it be exercise, hobbies/crafts, or volunteering..something like that…..I really feel I am at my best when I have reached out and helped other people who are in much worse situations etc. There are lots of opportunities out there, but you do have to search them out….can you volunteer at your local hospital, or do you love animals…can you volunteer at a local animal shelter….you did not say if you work outside the home, but perhaps a part time job working somewhere you might really enjoy will get you out of your house, out of your sad thoughts, and into perhaps a new circle of acquaintances that may possibly turn into friends….you have been married since you were 17…so that is a lot of youth to give up to marriage….and perhaps there are some issues there….I agree personal counseling probably would help you deal with your feelings and move you in the right direction.
I agree with lovemylife. Get yourself checked out medically first. We go through a lot of changes in our 50′s.
Counseling is also a good idea. You say you haven’t done anything in your life. You raised another human being. THAT is a big accomplishment in my book. You’ve maintained a marriage.
When my father died, over 170 people came to his funeral. My father was not a famous man or anything like that. He just ran an auto repair shop for 30 years. What struck me was that all the people that came to the funeral had stories of things (little things really, like fixing a tire for free when someone was in dire straits and needed to get to work) that my dad had done for them. The actions themselves were little, but the impact was big. I’m sure that if you think about it, you’ve probably done a lot of these types of things for others. I know that our culture puts a lot of value on the ‘big’ gestures, but, IMHO, it’s the times we touch other humans personally that count the most.
Good luck, let us know how you do.
Olga: I wonder if we have the same Dad!!! LOL!!! My Mom told me a story last night that had me AMAZED regarding my Dad. He’s 72 and in poor health, but is LOVED BY EVERYONE in the neighborhood. I mean these people come over in the winter and shovel snow from the grounds so he won’t have to, take him to his doctor’s appointments, little things like that. My Mom had a conversation recently with one of the neighbors and found out the reason why my Dad is so loved is because there was nothing he wouldn’t do for them in the 35 years he has lived in the neighborhood – from fixing stoves, refigerators, air conditioners and furniture to painting their houses to giving them credit from things they bought from his store or for services he provided to them – sometimes forgoing payment altogther. He did all this in secret and nobody in the family was aware of this. I spoke with a friend of mine’s that also lived on the block and she said – You didn’t know that? Everybody knows your Dad and loves him to death. The point is: You are SOOOOO RIGHT!!! It’s the little things that count and the little things that we will be remembered for in this life.
Countrygirl – there are probably a thousand things you have going for you that you’re not even aware of – things you may have taken for granted but other people love you for. Please take everyone’s advice and seek medical attention. You’ll feel so much better and thank God that you did. Good luck and God Bless.
Is there something you would love to do, but haven’t?
I think when we take ourselves…..out of ourselves, and help others, it makes such a difference!
Nursing homes, for instance….talk about lonliness…those dear souls (some) live out their lives never having a visitor, a human touch, etc…..might be a good place to start.
you are at the beginning stages of menopause and you are depressed. I went through this. Not only did i go through it, i looked bad. Would see my reflection in the mirror and could not believe that was me. It went on for years until i finally had to change my lifestyle since i did not take hormones. Exercise, change of diet and tell myself that it was up to me to do something about it. Yes, i went to the doctor many times but she told me that if i did not take the hormones, to do exactly what i did, but it took me a while to get the message. Walk, break a sweat, eat less and often, every 3 hours or so… it will boost your metabolism, but very little meals. I also would get very, very tired, sleepy and it was such an overwhelming sleepy feeling that i HAD to lay down. This too will pass, but you must take care of it. Let us know what you decide.
I understand how you feel. You need to have other interests outside of your home such as, visiting the nursing homes or the hospitals. You can volunteer in your districts elementary literacy program where you go to read books to children who are having difficulty with reading. You can volunteer at your church’s food pantry. Unless we are giving something of our selves back to the world we live in, it makes our existence dull, meaningless and unfruitful. You can even start a mentoring group in your home where some of the ladies from your church get together to pray and have bible study. You have been blessed so much not to have any health issues. Use the remaining time that you have left in this life to be a blessing to others. Getting busy will surely take your mind off of yourself and you will begin to see how fortunate and blessed you truly are. God bless you, keep your eyes on the Saviour and he will see you through.
D. Palmer
ohhhh..thank all of you for your wonderful advice,.I’am looking for work,outside the home,but no one will hire me,I don’t know if it is me or if they don’t need anyone,that alone brings me down,wondering if I’m the reason.to be honest with you all,.I’am scared to go to back to work.I haven’t worked in about 6-7 years..I’m now 52,maybe that is normal to feel that way.I don’t know..a lot of people like you,. have told me to go volunteer work..I need to go to work to get paid,we need the income.my husband works so hard,and we just can’t seem to get ahead,.I want to help him pay the bills..I would like to ask you a question.why do I carry such quilt all the time?.over everything.I haven’t been perfect by no means,.but I don’t know what I have done to have all this quilt feelings…I’am a CHRISTian,I love GOD,.one of the reasons I don’t want to work with old people or sick people it brings me down so much,I set and think,.maybe my family or my kids,husband will get that way..it is sad to me…don’t get me wrong I feel for them that are that way,it just worries me.and depresses me..and I have that feeling already,.I do thank GOD for what I have and my health,.my family’s health,my kids health..my home,the bills that I get to pay..the salt on the table,.I just have these feelings..maybe it is the life changeing,menapauseal thing..I do not want to take any medicans,treatments or anything like that..I’m scared of those things,have heard so many bad story’s about them…again thank you all….GOD BLESS
Hello, country girl. Sometimes as we age we tend to go through changes in the way we think. We often think about our lives and wonder whether or not we used the life that God gave to us to its fullest. Our bodies change and sometimes we think of the past and dig up past failures. It seems to me that you have a fairly enjoyable life and family that loves you. You have a husband that you believe loves you and you him. Maybe that is where your problem may be coming from. Have you done or tried anything new lately? Sometimes we can get stuck in life and not allow ourselves to experience or enjoy other things. Go on a weekend staycation with just you and your sweetheart. Get dolled up and go out on a date. The two of you should be reminded of what it is about one another that attracted you to each other. Stir up the embers and start a mighty blazing fire of love and romance. Remember the old Motown songs like the temptations “my girl” Buy some CD’s with oldies but goodies and when your husband comes home from work, have a buble bath waiting for him or whatever you think turns him on. Cook dinner of his favorite foods. When we give our hearts to Jesus , sometimes we forget how to enjoy life and all it encompasses. Start doing some of the things that make you happy. The word of God says that we are special and that God loves us. In order to embrace or give love, you must first know how to love yourself. The word of God says that “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” and also “as a man (woman) thinks in his heart so is he”. You need to get some affirmation scriptures out of the word of God and apply them to your life or situation, such as, “greater is he that is in me than he that is in the world” or “I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me” We are at war and it is a spiritual war. satan wants to render us ineffective and so depressed and sad, that we are no good to be used by God. He ia a liar and the father of lies and there is no truth in him. Use the power and authority that God has given all of his children to use to bind satan and all of his coherts. Be blessed, God is only a prayer away.
Dee
hello..sunshine1957,,thank you for your inspiring words,and your concerns,.I have a wonderful husband,BUT their isn’t a romantic bone in his body..I was just talking to him about this very thing this morning,.it is hard for us to get away,because of financies..times are very hard here,we own a small business,and it is not doing very good..we survive.no extra’s..so this would be wonderful,..but can’t afford it at this time…you know,. I was driving home this morning,and talking to GOD,I was asking him to help me,.telling him that I don’t know what my purpose in life was,I don’t have a clue of what I’am suppose to be,or do or where I’m going..nothing…I set here day by day..clean,cook,walk around outside,think all the time,.WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO BE DOING WITH MY LIFE,..MY LIFE,..nothing seems to make me happy,or fullfiled….I don’t understand Sunshine..is it something wrong with me or is it a change my body is making..or is it something the LORD is doing to put me somewhere.,,?????????????…My mind is everywhere….it is so stressfull….I’am asking you a question..Is this normal???? I don’t want med’s…I don’t want a shrink,..I just want some PEACE OF MINE….GOD BLESS YOU pray for me