| What’s your favorite hobby? | Hot Conversation |
I’m looking for a new hobby. I paint. I write. I read. I watch nature. I’m a creative type, and I want to expand my hobby field. Only one condition – it must not damage the environtment.
I’d like to you to tell me what you like to do and why you like it. If you have tips, I’d be interested.
Vi
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I used Noxzema from the time I was old enough to wash my own face, all through school and into adulthood. Then I decided it wasn't 'sophisticated' enough and went with higher priced, higher end products. About 5 years ago, I went back to I used Noxzema from the time I was old enough to wash my own face, all through school and into adulthood. Then I decided it wasn't 'sophisticated' enough and went with higher priced, higher end products. About 5 years ago, I went back to my old faithMost of the above posts are by women, and many of you seem insecure about your sexuality at your age. Please don't be! While it's true that many of us guys prefer younger women, there are some (like me) that find women over 50 much sexier.
How funny....i only very recently (within last week) read the coconut oil articles on the web. (100 uses, 80 uses etc.) so i bouht some and ordered some from amazon. (Im a stockpiler.)
Have started trying some of the uses. I tried using it a
If your going to be financially secure enough to venture out and see whats available in the B & B field...take your time and check it out. If you have to jump into a job..just to have one..you will not be happy. Hope you get the time to find wh
Hi SatorisWIngs, I too have many hobbies – I love to read, garden, explore & practice alternate health life choices (reiki, chi gong, accupuncture, etc) but my all time life long favorite is anything to do with fabric! I’ve sewn since I was a young girl and through the years, made most of my own clothes, wedding gown, did some upholstery, drapes, curtains – you get the picture! But now, all my creative energy with fabric goes into quilting! I was hooked 12 years ago when I made my oldest son a t-shirt quilt from all his wrestling t-shirts and I haven’t stopped since. I purchased a long-arm quilt machine 4 years ago so I could machine quilt the finished top and now quilt for others as well. This hobby has become so much more. I belong to a very active guild that meets once a month – great to spend time and be inspired by others that share this “obsession”! I also meet with a small group of friends once a month for an all day Saturday quilting day . .. we have such fun together and are a real life line for each other! We enjoy traveling to quilt shops in our local area and sometimes further away for a fun day trip, as well as attending other guilds yearly quilt shows . .lots of inspiration there! Why do I like it? It’s a great way to be creative, but mostly, when I’m in my quilt room all other worries/cares melt away.
Gail
Cool. My mother taught me to sew when I was 9, I think. Quilting is an art form. I have some old quilts that my grandmother made. I think that finding something that helps the cares melt away is key to happiness. Wonderful that you found it. Thanks for sharing what it means to you.
My problem would be that in quilting, one has to be so precise for it to look good. How to you deal with that kind of requirement? Do you treat it as a challenge?
Good Morning SatorisWings! Wow, when I received the e-mail that their was another response to this topic and I re-read my response to you from back in July I thought, “oh my gosh, where has the time gone, it was 2 months ago when I sent my note for you” and still haven’t replied to your question”! So sorry about that. Yes, it is true that the process of making/creating a quilt- the cutting & piecing work - needs to be accurate for a nicely squared finished product – this allows the quilt when finished to hang or lay without ripples. However, that being said, I have myself made and have finished quilt tops for customers that aren’t so perfect and they are still beautiful, well loved works of art. I have also listened to quilters that teach and do guest speaking at our guild meetings say not to worry about every seam meeting up perfectly – just have fun – let your creative juices flow! I couldn’t agree more. Along the way I have picked up lots of tips and tricks that make it simpler and easier. And in the end, that’s what I want quilting to be for me . . a fun place to relax and be creative, not another area in life to deali with stress. I like to think of myself as someone who puts a lot of thought, love, and energy into doing a really great job . . .but not a perfectionist. At the present time I have 4 beautiful customer quilts surrounding me in my quilt room: a table runner with grape clusters, vines and wine bottles, a runners t-shirt memory quilt, a bright, cheery pinks and purples quilt for a customers granddaughters bed, and hand appliqued blocks quilt all waiting to be finished for use! It’s a comforting place to be!
There have been some great responses here to your question, so many talented ladies. So, what have you decided on for yourself?
Gail, enjoying an early morning peppermint tea in chilly NH (this cold weather has happened too soon!)
my favorite hobby is any kind of crafts. I love working with my hands. Clay, needlepoint, macrame, beading, sewing, painting, scrapbooking. what ever i am in the mood to do I go into my studio and create. So go to a craft store and look over the books and if you see one that grabs you leaf through it and start creating. it will amaze you what you can do if you put your mind to it.
Thanks for your response. I sew. I crochet. I knit. I’ve done ceramics from the clay. I paint. I draw, etc. What I really want to know is why you love something.
You mention beading. I got a book once, thinking I’d like to make a beaded belt. I must be dense because the book made no sense to me.
Hi SatorisWings, I have not communicated with you for a couple of months; first, how are you doing? I am in a much better place emotionally. Thanks for your contribution to my well being. In our last conversation via Vibrant Nation, I was in a funk, a little depressed. You ladies here made a great different in my life. I even met a great new friend on here; her name is Donna. How did I get so lucky? We have traded emails, home addresses and telephone numbers. She is a great and compassioned friend; A sweet, sweet lady. I hope to meet her and her family, sometimes in the coming year. Next month I will be 67 years old and it is a good feeling to be making new friends at my age. I am at a point in life, when people my age are not only losing family members to death, but their friends as well. This is a great site for those of us over 50 to make connections with like minded women.
I am retired and have many interests that can keep me busy all day, everyday if I let it. I enjoy reading bios of politicians, putting my personal thoughts down on paper, (been doing this since, 1976), painting, gardening, meeting new people, (watching C-Span, the History Channel, the travel channel, Food Network, the Home Garden Network, the Military Channel, The Secince Channels, the Courts Programs and so forth.
I enjoy meeting new people, learning about the different Cultures, (from new immigraints), and learning new things: I never get tired of it. Watching TV, when I have a private moment, I have learned many new things. Because I have more than a hundred channels on cable; television is more than entertaining for me, it’s like I have a real live professor living with me 24/7.
The home gardend show teaches us how to do our own decorating and fix things around our own homes, thus saving ourselves thousands of dollars. The food network teaches us how to make new and more healthy dishes. The travel channel takes us to new places in the world, without leaving the comfort of our own homes. The history channel teaches us things we may have forgot about; not only in our own country but about the world. The military channel teaches us not only about our role in war and peace around the world, but it shows all the new teconology, that are being invented to help our soldiers. The science channell teaches us all about earth, space and all the living creaters in deep blue seas. And court television, shows all the different issues that affect our dealings with each other and the manny solutions we could use in sloving our own problems. Did I mention CNN, MSNBC and our local news? I try to make sure, I put something new into my brains everyday, if I don’t feed it, it will die…………….
I also enjoy visiting with friends, going out to lunch, dinner or having them over my place, taking long walks either alone with my music or with friends. I also enjoy my flower garden in the spring/summer and early fall. I spend quality time with my 42 year old son, talking, sharing and laughing every single day of the week; therefore, my retirement is much fuller and richier, than I had imagine. Then there are days when I get up and say, today, I am not going to do anything! For me, life is good. I am not rich or anywhere near it. As a matter of fact, I am on the lower end of our ecomomics; but I am happy!!
I forgot to say, that I have 25-45 new books, I haven’t even gotton past the table of contents. My son keep buying me books before I can get a chance to read the ones I have; everytime he hears a politician have written a new book, he comes home and surprise me with it, the day is comes out. I gave a lot of books to the Salvation Army last March 2008, but I have shelves and shelves of books, yet to read; not enough hours in the day. I need at least 36 hours in my days. I only sleep about 4-5 hours a day. I wish I knew what it felt like to get 8 hours of sleep.
I’m so glad you are doing better and have so many interests. I know what you mean by friends and family dying. With me, most of the people I have known in the past have different interests and beliefs than I do now. I’ve moved on to other things, and they are where they were years ago. So it’s a reorientation and getting into myself. I live in a rural area by choice. My husband and I are writers and it’s peaceful here. In rural Oregon there is not much cultural diversity, unfortunately. The perks are the wildlife and the forests, nature things.
I’m thinking I might try sculpting next. Now I just have to figure out what kind. I don’t have a kiln, so I won’t use clay. That leaves carving things, and I don’t want to cut myself. Still, the activities director at the nursing home where my mother lives carves lovely wooden things. I’ll ask her about it next time I go to see Mom.
I haven’t slept well since menopause began 16 years ago. It’s exhausting. I too wish I could sleep 8 hours. I would consider that a miracle.
I agree with you that sometimes on this life’s journey, we lose friends not to death but through a different out-look on life as we get older. Many may think their best years are behind them, when they get to be my age. I do not feel this way. I have finally gotten to the point where, I am interested in traveling a bit, which I hope to began in 2010, (finally got my passport book and passport card. It costs twice as much to travel as a single individual, with these personally guided tours, even in this country.
However, I will feel more comfortable traveling with a group. If I can’t find a room-mate, I will have to bite the bullet and pay a bit more. I am not crazy about flying but I will fly. My plan is to do most of my travels with guided tours by cruises, trains and or motor coaches in the United States, Canada and Germany.
There is so much of this country that I have not seem. I want to see it all, without having to worry about driving, getting lost, parking, hotels, food and sightseeing events. I have been researching different guided tours, for a few months. The hardest thing is to decide where to go first and which company is best suited for this kind of travel. Do you have any experience with guided tours? Any advice would be appreciated.
Yes, I understand your wanting to live in a rual area, I grew up in rural Ala. My brother and many other family members, still live a very slow and low-keyed life. I have lived in New York for the past 49 years; however I still love nature. I love the fact that you and your husband keep your brains active; I think it is very important as we age, to find new interests. You and your husband sound like very talented people. Good luck with your new project, sculpting.
I agree with you, that menopause is a trip. I suffered with it for years, burning up one minute and freezing the next, especially in the winter. I found 2,000 mgs of vitamen C and 800-1200 mgs of vitamen E, each day helped with menopause. If taken too late in the day, they will keep you awake at night also. These are energy vitamens and their affects in our bodies tends to last about 1o-12 hours.
My friend, good hearing from you again. Thanks for responding and happy sculpting.
Thanks for the suggestions of the Vit C and E. I took high doses for years and they did help. Mostly that is over with now, and I only get occasional hot flashes. I understand that some women have hot flashes into old old age. But sleeping is still an issue. It’s mostly related to low blood sugar and the stress relative to my elderly mother – handling her affairs and thinking that the next phone call will tell me she is dead. She has several health problems which could take her at any time. This has been going on for 3 years. Right now I’m in negotiations over the sale of the family home – I have to sell it to pay for Mom’s stay in the nursing home. It’s a real heart wrencher. The potential buyers really try to take advantage of a person.
My husband and I are still in the process of following our dreams. We aren’t retired, we just moved to the country to do our thing here. One of these days my books are going to become best sellers. I feel in in my bones, as the old timers used to say.
I know nothing about travel groups. If I were to do it alone, I would do like you, go with a group. I think it would be a lot more fun. How about trying the Red Hat Society? http://www.redhatsociety.com These are feisty ladies like us who do all kinds of things. They have a travel button on their web site. You might click it and find out about their trips. I bet they would be a lot of fun to travel with.
My main concern about traveling is adding to the carbon footprint. The planet is in such dire shape. I don’t want to fly or take a cruise because airlines and cruise ships dump their garbage out over the ocean. There are 3 huge flotsom islands in the oceans, one the size of Texas that are becoming toxic soup and killing all life there. So I stay home. Not much of a traveler anyway. But maybe you could find groups who are environmentally aware and take steps to make sure that their tours don’t add to the problem.
Love,
Vi
Hi Vi,
I am so sorry to hear about your mother being so ill. I can almost imagine the stress you must be under. Are you an only child or just the oldest? The end of life is a very sad chapter in most of our lives; however, most people are not involved in all the decisions that falls on the primary caregiver.
They have no idea, how hard it is to keep your own everyday affairs in order and at the same time, try to make the best decision possible, for your loved one and it’s not just one big decision, it is so many, many decisions.
I had an experience, where my friend of 20 years, developed Azheimer’s Disease and had no relatives living near us and she did not want to go and live with them. We had discussioned this issue, years before she got sick.
I became her Power of Attorney and took care of her, the last 4 years of her life. I had to learn fast, to do the un-pleasant things, you now find yourself doing. The very hardest part for me, was when she stoped speaking english and spoke only German. This was hard for me. I had no idea what she was talking about and a few months later, she stop talking altogether. The best thing about her illiness was, we had been friends for such a long time and we really knew each other’s likes and dislikes; and we had discussed end of life care; what she wanted and what she did not want. I never thought I would actually have to carry out her wishes.
My mother had died when I was only two years old. As I got older, I was very jelouse of my adult friends, who had their mothers; but, God Gave me the opportunity, to be a daughter to my friend, before she died. She developed this disease when she was 92 and died just 10 days before her 97th birthday.
I was lost and numb for weeks. It took me about a year to come to terms with her death. She was old, but in very good health. Her only problem was the alzheimer’s disease. I kept her active, until 21 days before her death. She fell, fractured her hip, had surgery and 21 days later she had passed away. I felt like a part of me had died. I loved her so much. She was a kind and funny lady and felt like my blood mother.
So knowing what I went through, I can’t imagine what you must be feeling now; especially when the telephone rangs. My friend, thoughts and prayers are being sent your way. I mean this. I will be thinking of you often and each time I do, I will pray that God will give you strength to do what you have to do and peace in knowing, you did all you could, that you did your best for mom.
Keep me posted when you get a chance. And remember your husband, lean on him for a little extra moral and emotional srtength. I wish I could help you. Be strong my friend. Love Jo
Thanks, Jo,
for your understanding and your kind words of encouragement and for sharing your story. At least Mom gets good care at the nursing home. She likes it there and people like her. She always told me never to put her there. So when there was no other acceptable choice, it was really hard on me. She was always so shy, and nursing home was a four letter word to her. But after she fell and lay on the floor for 17 hours despite her lifeline bracelet, she wasn’t the same. She had a personality change and her physical problems became severe. Anyway, she likes it there and is friendly to everyone. So that helps.
Today I learned from a friend of Mom’s that 3 -4 weeks ago Mom was taken to the hospital in the middle of the night because she couldn’t breathe. Mom has COPD and congestive heart failture, so this is not a surprise. What is a surprise is that no one called me. They called Mom’s friend when they couldn’t get me. My husband and I don’t hear the phone at night and we don’t want to. And where Mom is, is far enough away and with our sight the way it is, we don’t drive at night unless we have to. The road to see Mom is long and dark and along a river.
So now I have to confront the staff at the nursing home about them not calling me the next day.
I’m okay with Mom dying. I made peace with that years ago. What I’m not okay with is all the people who will take advantage of a person during times of stress. The selling of Mom’s house is much more traumatic for me, because she loves it so. She lived there 60 years. And it’s the family home.
Anyway, last night I made a decision to stop allowing this to bring me down. I’ve made this decision before, but I keep being pulled back into it when something else happens. I have to pull myself out of this more effectively. Mom could die tonight, or she could live 5 years. I won’t allow myself to be down for that long. Learning to be happy inspite of stress is a biggy.
You took on quite a chore with your friend. I would have found it nearly impossible to do what you did. I’m caring, but not a caregiver. I never had kids.
Happiness is a decision.
Vi
Vi, it’s good to hear that your mother has accepted her stay in a nursing home, especially, when she had already indicated, that was not her wish. I am sure this was probably one of the hardest decision, you had to make as an adult and I am sure you had a few sleepless night over this decision, until mom accepted her new home as a fact.
When I finally put my friend in an Assisted Living Facilities, I kept her apartment for another six months, paid all the bills and made sure she was going to stay there, before I closed it down. It took me another couple of months, to go through all her things. You can imagine how much stuff someone have by the age of 97.
Why did mom’s lifeline bracelet not work? Was it defective? It is horrible to think about someone you love, lying injured, in pain and unable to call for help. I am sorry you had to experience this. I feel bad for you that you are the one left with the responsibility, of selling your family home, especially in these troubled economic times; however, I wish you all the best.
I am happy to hear that you are trying to move forwards in your own life, with a more positive attitude. I am not sure how your eating habits are, but, I have found that the B-complex, B-6, E, C and the Niacin vitamins do wonders for your state of mind. I am never depressed any more. Yes, I get upset at a particular situation but not depressed. Never.
So, my friend, if you do try these vitamins and don’t like staying up late, I would suggest taking them before noon. I call them energy vitamins. You could probably get them at your health food store, no additives. So, be well my friend and keep up the good work regarding your positive out-look. If you practice thinking positively every day, before you know it, it will almighty become a part of who you are and you will just love the new you.
Jo,
Thanks for the suggestions on the additives. I’ve been careful of what I eat since I was 25, when I learned I’m hypoglycemic. I take supplements to help stabablize everything. Ongoing stress, however, does horrible things to the blood sugar levels – which leads to lack of sleep and a yoyo in the emotions. I do the best I can with this. I’m a big believer in handling these things myself. I’m not a fan of the medical industry.
Right now I’m waiting for the realtor to write up my counter offer. If what is supposed happen on the offer with the sale happens, then things will be okay. Not what I hoped for, but okay. As long as the guy who is trying to buy the house is honorable, it will be a good thing. And I will feel the relief. The potential closing on the property is Nov. 16th.
Yes, I can imagine how much a person can have after 97 years. It’s wonderful you did that for her. You gotta be a nice person. Mom had lived in her house for 60 years when I had to clear it out to sell it. And these things I was emotionally attached to. It took my husband and I from Jan until May to clear it out, bring some things home, take some to the dump etc. The hardest part was Mom’s family piano. It’s expensive to move a piano and we live a goodly distance away. I ended up giving it to someone was supposedly giving it to a group home for kids. Then I later learned it just ended up in this ladies garage, and I was so disappointed. It was my grandparents piano, that they scrimped and saved to buy. I didn’t tell Mom about that.
I talked to Mom today and she was getting her breathing treatment. I’d go visit her more than I do, but she doesn’t remember the visits. I’ve called her a few hours after I’ve visited, and she hasn’t remembered I was there. So I visit at my convenience and call her often. She’s not a conversationalist, so it means I have to come up with everything to say. Lord, I’m tired today.
By the way, if you would like to email me, you can go to my web site and find the contact us page and send a message. Then I will respond with my email address. The web site url is http://www.whereartmeetstheheart.com.
Thanks for your friendship. I’m glad for the support.
Vi
Quilting is a fanastic hobby. I saved some of my mother favorite sweat shirts after she passed cut the designs out and made a memory quilt using these patches and some other things she left behind. It’s a great way to recycle memento tee shirts, sovongniers from trips. Scrap booking is another way to recycle mementos of events or celebrations, even everyday accomplishments with children and grandchildren. I took the cards, photos and party mementos from my grandparents 25th anniversery to create a memory book to pass to the those after me. It keeps the family history alive for the younger generation, particularly if they pass early.
Bekah,
Thanks for your reply. Quilts are beautiful. I have one my grandmother made and one my dad’s sister made for me. They are such artistic endeavors. When I tried it, I couldn’t seem to get my corners square enough, and the work looked shoddy. It’s been a number of years since I tried. Any suggestions on that? And I know scrap booking is an art form and there certainly are enough photos…getting myself to do that is another issue. I have no children, so there is no one to pass it on to. But I should do something for myself in this area.
Vi
Not true SatorisWings… I have no chidlren. My neices and nephews are vying for who gets to claim what.
Now about those corners .. I machine a lot of the work I do. I sew to the point of the corner, leave the needle down in the fabric, lift the presser foot turn the fabric ninety degrees,put the presser foot down and continue the seam line. Press the seams flat. Sometimes when I have a hard time turning the fabric I’ll use a butter knife to push the corner out. IN THE WORDS OF MY GRANDMOTHER PRACTICE… PRACTICE…… My first efforts were ….ahhh welll let’s just say I can find every flaw, every out of line stitch. So as we work we learn every project I do I find a new way to handle things,new ideas and new mistakes. The mistakes means that a human flesh and blood woman created this… not a machine that puches out perfectly sized and alined stitches. Once perfection is acheived what is there left to strive for?
Then your nieces and nephews are more caring than mine. For me, my statement is true. It’s been a very sad realization for me. With my mother dying and the selfishness that has emerged from these kids – ages 40 through 49 – I realize there is no fixing it. When Mom is gone and her estate is settled – I am the executor – I will leave them all behind.
I do sew. I couldn’t find any jeans to fit – it’s the shriinking butt thing since the end of menopause. So I made jeans from scratch using an old pair that fit just right as a pattern. In the process I was in a hurry to zigzag the seam edges. I got to going too fast, figuring I could hurry through that part. Wrong. Turns out that I was going so fast and it got part of the machine too hot and blew something. It started smoking, and the needle was stuck going up and down really fast. I had to unplug it to turn it off. When I took it in to the repair shop, they told me that the machine didn’t need this thing. I think it was a capacitor. So they bypassed it. Anyway, I got burned out on sewing for a while when that happened. So I have to get in the mood to sew again.
I do remember about doing corners the way you suggest, but when I tried it that way, somehow I was doing it wrong, and instead of making a right angle turn, the thread didn’t catch underneath, so the top thread cut across at an angle.
I am sorry to hear about the family situation. But perhaps you have friends who would enjoy the gifts. It’s easy to get burnt out, I think that’s how I wound up with so many hobbies. I worked for Levi Strauss right out of high school and hated it!!! It was almost a year before I would even mend anything. I had to settle my mothers’ estate and that is no easy task.
To insure the thread is caught you might roll the hte wheel back then forward again to knot the stitch.
Don’t know if you enjoy reading… if you do you might check out the following books for inspiriation. They are out of print but a copy can occasionally be found online Barnes & Noble “out of Print” section or Half Price book stores. The books are by T.Davis Bunn, they are titled
“The Quilt” “The Gift” “The Music Box”. The are what I refer to as day readers they are not terribly long can usually be finished in a day or two.
I’m back to sewing some of my “vintage” 1970′s patterns no mind you I have to enlarge them (more than I wish) and update as I like my blouses to end just below the hip line. But I am thrilled to have them.
I’m an author. I write novels. I loved to read when I was little. There are a few books that changed my life for the better. That’s why I write – to pass the gift along.
The book, The Gift, that you mentioned, is that the one by Danielle Steele? I read it to see what kind of writing she did. I guess it takes her 3 months to write a book. The other two I’ve never read. Who are the authors?
Thanks for the corner tip. I too have old patterns. Some of them belonged to my mother, so they are really old. She’s 90. Some of them I got in the ’60s and 70′s and I too have to englarge them a couple of sizes. If I was that thin now, I’d look gaunt. Patterns really are expensive now. I remember buying them for $.35.
Got to go and work on my painting of the wild turkey I befriended when he was injured. I hope to have it done by next week when we go down to see my mom for her 91st birthday.
Oh how cool, I haven’t seen a wild turkey since I lived in Colorado!! All three books are written by T Davis Bunn. They are not very thick and you’ll have to look for them at Second Hand book stores or Barnes & Noble “Out of Print” on line. I’ve read some Danielle Steele (Fine Things, Full Circle. Kaliescope) she’s a romance writier and I enjoyed the ones I read. I like time travels, romance, mysteries, inspiriational fatih based,what can I say I like to read, too.
Hope your Mom has a fanastic 91st Birthday, savor your time. I’m off to fix dinner.
I’m not a Danielle Steele fan. I know she’s made a lot of money. But to me she needs to edit and rewrite her work – a lot. I’m really not a romance book reader. A little romance in a story is fine, but it has to have more substance than romance. My stories are all mystical. I also like time travel stories. I like science fiction a lot, although I’ve not tried to write one yet. Right now one of my characters in the novel I’m currently writing has wings and no one else knows about it. They just sort of showed up, and I decided to go with it. If they prove to be stupid, I will take them out.
It’s time for my mom to move on. She’s been dying for 3 years. We’ve said our goodbyes a bunch of times – each time she was close to death. I’m more than tired -drained by it all. The medical profession has done a huge disservice to people by dragging out their deaths. She can barely breath now. Every exertion of any kind takes her breath away – even with extra oxygen and medications to help keep her lungs clear. But it’s her choice to keep on taking the treatments. If she becomes unconscious, she wants me to have her disconnected from the oxygen and for them to stop feeding her. So I will honor her wishes.
I just hope that one night she goes to sleep and dies peacefully, not in some gasping painful death.
Here, in podunk, Oregon it’s a beautiful day. Chester, the turkey, showed up today and I fed him his ration of bread and the extra seeds. He is just so sweet. I’ve never befriended a turkey before
It has been three years since my brothers and I honored our mothers choice. Stopping the medical treatment was a hassle. Even with us having her DNR/medical power of attorney and living will we still had to fight the primary care doctor. He kept saying she could live another 3 months if we kept her on life support what was the purpose of the DNR? This was not her desire, she was tired and fed up with treatments (she had lung diesase) that only extended her life and did nothing for the quality of that life. She was in ICU and tried twice to unplug the ventilator herself. It is hard to let go even when you know this is their desire… it is harder still to watch them suffer with no hope of enjoying their time.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
It’s a warm, sunny autumn day here in Arlington,Texas. We are baking cookies for my niece’s bowling party Sunday.
My sister in law had a thought, if you would like to leave your quilts to be used and enjoyed consider donating them to your local Hospice.
I’ve decided that the medical community is cruel – for the sake of making money. It’s hard when a person is in the position to need to enforce their dying loved ones wishes and the medical community makes it all the harder. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.
Mom is in a nursing home. They have a staff doctor. Mom will agree to most anything. So when they ask if she wants to go to the hospital, even though it clearly states on the form that she wants no interference, they tell her it will make her feel better, and at the moment she is vulnerable and not in her right mind, so she agrees. For me to put a stop to that kind of thing I’d have to have her declared incompetent. That costs money. So I won’t do that unless she becomes unconscious. I’m so emotionally tired from this. I have to sell the family home. Mom lived there for 60 years. She has to sell it to pay for her nursing home care. I could have sold it 2 years ago for a lot more than I will get now, but Mom wasn’t ready. So I didn’t sell it. Now it is falling apart and in the meantime I’ve gotten Mom sort of used to the idea of selling it. A guy made and offer, I countered and he accepted. Hopefully it goes through so that responsibility off of my shoulders. It would be nice to have a sane sibling to share this with.
Mom keeps saying that it’s in God’s hands. I keep saying it’s not God, it’s the pills that are keeping her alive, and she can opt out entirely when she’s ready. But it goes on and I nearly tear out my hair at times. One day, hopefully soon, this will be over and then I can rest and heal. I do hope the house sells before she dies. It will be a lot less complicated that way.
Giving the things I make to Hospice is an excellent idea. They were so kind to me when my sweetheart, Gary was dying of cancer. He was in the hospice unit at the hospital. Those people were so comforting.
We will pray for you and your Mom that God will bring her quietly and peacefully to His side, and release the holding pattern your are both in.
Hospice was a great comfort both with my Mom and when my grandfather died with cancer. Their resources are stretched to the max . If I can donate things to help bring comfort or inspire people while they are in this dark time then I consider it to be a blessing for me.
Keep me posted. Let me know when the picutre of Chester is complete.
Keep your faith .
Thanks for your encouragement. Yesterday was Mom’s 91st bd. She is definitely fading, and the meds are doing less and less for her. The medical profession gets in the way of the right solution for Mom.
Here’s the link to the painting of Chester. Be sure to read his story below and see the photos as well. He’s a sweety.
http://www.whereartmeetstheheart.com/xfiles/xchester.shtml
I came back to check on a post I made a couple of weeks ago and couldn’t find it.I meant to let you know who much I loved Chesters picture. He looks like he is improving nicely. I can’t find where my post went. That’s the third post I’ve lost in cyberspace. Wanted to check in with you and see how you are doing. Haven’t seen you post much of late and I was concerned about you. You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers daily. Did Chester heal completely before winter?
There pictures are so cool. Love the whales. I am going to send the link to some friends of mine if it’s okay with you.
stay in touch
Thanks for your concern. My mom passed away in October. I’ve been busy handling her estate. Her house finally sold, and to make that happen in time for the sale I had to do probate. Turns out probate can be good. It took the legal heat off of me. I’ve been in recovery mode. The three years of anticipatory grief did a number on me. At this point I can feel myself healing a little more every day.
Glad you liked Chester’s pictures. I think he’s as healed as he is going to be. His injured foot and ankle are still three times as large as the other. Today it’s really cold here, and he’s holding that foot like it’s really cold or hurting. Lots of times turkeys stand on one leg. So I’m feeding him lots of seeds and so far today I’ve given him 3 slices of bread for quick energy to help him warm up.
I just got offered a contract for my old lady book. Yea!! I emailed my agent and will call him after lunch with my concerns about the contract. Here’s hoping he can work out the details.
Please send the link to whomever you think would be interested. Thanks.
How have you been?
I am so sorry for your loss. Even when their passing is expected there is still the grief and the loss to work through. I’m glad the house didn’t take long. Took almost eight months to sell my moms’.
Congratulations on your contract!!! I know he will be able to work things to your benefit. Sounds like Chester is getting spoiled…. but hey he makes you smile so it’s more than worth it.
I went to tax class Oct/Nov/Dec. I am finishing my skills training for Tax season. I needed to know more about taxes, self employment and such. It will give me a little craft money. I participated in the NaNoWriMo for the first time. I was pleased with my writing, so I will continue working on the novel. It was fun trying to write and study for finals, lol I haven’t had to study in well a few decades.
We’re getting ready for the holidays I promised to help my niece with baking tomorrow so I’d better close for now. Take a break and let the upcoming season lift your spirit. I’ll be thinking of you.
My mom’s house was listed for sale in May of 2007. It closed November 20, 2009. So it did take a long time. It’s just that it closed exactly a month after Mom died. Your 8 months sounds like heaven to me.
I’m not grievnig because Mom is gone. It was time. I’m grieving because of all I learned about my family during the 3 plus years Mom was in the home. I thought I was just different from them. Instead I learned that most of them are not nice people. I’m grieving the loss of the illusion that they were nice. I lost Mom years ago when she stopped being herself because of not enough oxygen making it to her brain. I’ve been grieving for her all along. Her illness for three years and all the responsibility wore me to a nubbin. I’m healing myself from that now.
I may not sign the book contract. The agent said he can negotiate it into better terms, but he said he will stall the publisher and get me several other offers so I can choose the best one. He’s also working on a package movie deal for all my books.
So, do you help people prepare their income taxes – is that why the tax class?
Good luck on the writing. Remember the key to writing success is persistence. And remember writing is 10 percent inspiration and 90 percent perspiration. That has been true for me.
Thanks for your good thoughts.
Good luck on the book contract. I hope that your choice of offers is eveything you want it to be. Maybe this would be a good time to take a break for yourself, just go somewhere you can be spoiled and pampered.
Yes I am going to prepare taxes, at least for tax season. I have been making silk arrangements for years, they sell as fast as I can make them. When I took the class I wanted to learn the tax laws governing a small self owned business. I learned a good bit. After tax season I will be taking some additional classes to give me a more in depth knowledge.
I wish I could say I love everyone in my family, but that would be untrue. At the moment there are a few I’m not even sure I want to acknowledge.
Just before Thanksgiving my disabled brothers wife decided to announce on Facebook she had walked out on him. I guess there could have been worse ways to accomplish this, just not sure of how right now. We are going to go home for Christmas and be with him through the holidays and his birthday (the 28th). I can only be there for him, I know its’ something they have to work out, but I’m so mad I could burst. I will make peace with myself it is just going to be awhile.
I use to think life would be easier at this stage (shows what I knew)… I don’t think it does, the problems are different the answers are complicated if they can be found.
Let me know if I can do anything for you.
I promised to help bake cookies with the girls tomorrow …. their finals are over and I think I’m looking forward to raw cookie dough. lol !
Thanks for the idea about being pampered. Actually all that I need I have right here. I have a dear husband. I have two wonderful kitties and I have Chester the wild turkey who are all good to me. I live in the boonies with trees and pastureland all around, so it’s beautiful.
Save me some cookie batter. I love that too. Actually I plan to buy some chocolate chips and make some cookies in the next day or so.
Your brother’s soon to be ex sound like a complete @#$. What a cold way to announce she’s left him. Completely classless and inconsiderate. Relationships are strange. I found the right husband on the third try. One of my nephews found the right wife on the fifth try. It works, I’m sure, because she doen’t put up with his temper. She’s mellowed him a lot. The rest of the nephews and nieces need to grow up for 30 more years and they are all in their forties.
Yes, life has its ongoing difficulties. And there are lessons one can learn all along the way. One of the biggies for me is when to let relationships go. I always think I can fix everything with love and compassion. That turned out to be wrong. So I’m learning the letting go lesson. Last night we were talking and my husband told me that I’m kind of like Jimmy Stewart in It’s a Wonderful Life. He said that I’ve done for everyone else my whole life and now it’s time for me. That was so nice of him. I never thought of it that way. But now that Mom is gone and after just a little more estate settling I can move on to my own thing. It’s kind of like that Geico caveman commercial – “let me be myself so I can shine.” I’m 60 now, and it’s time for me to shine. Yea!! I insist. 60 is good.
I will say I like this part of my life much better. Sure, the body aches in places and it seems like things are falling off so to speak. But I like me now. I like what I’m doing. I like where my choices led me. I like and love my husband. It is good.
Thanks for the offer. I do appreciate it. Truly. At this point I’m hanging in and healing a little at a time.
Where do you sell the silk arrangements? I ask because I have an email buddy who makes lovely collages and shadow boxes. She sells them to people she knows and those who work with her husband. She tried selling them on line, but that hasn’t worked well. If you have any ideas, I would love to hear them, so I can pass the info on to her. She lives in New Jersey.
Thanks for the offer. I do appreciate it. Truly. At this point I’m hanging in and healing a little at a time. This is me time.
Oops I repeated the thank you. Guess I really mean it. lol