Dr. Dorree Lynn

No Such Thing As a Monogamous Relationship

In today’s society there is almost no such thing as a long-term monogamous relationship. This does not mean one must have an affair, or two or three. However, It does mean that to stay wed, couples do best leaning to renegotiate who each has grown into at specific developmental junctures.  These renegotiating points include but may not be all:  after children are born, after they leave, menopause, any physical disability or change, a job or location move, getting older, etc. It is hard enough for most people to live peacefully with themselves some of the time; living at peace with another requires double the effort.  We teach many skills, self-awareness and communication are generally not among them.  As a practicing psychologist who has worked with couples for 2/3 of my life, I believe if couples considered working at intimacy  (and sexuality) with as much care as purchasing a new home or “giving at the office,” we might just have more fulfilled families as well as a more stable society.


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