Well, I did it. I met a man online, exchanged a few emails, and made a date for drinks. This is HUGE for me. And I actually WENT and had drinks.
And I couldn’t wait to get out of there and go home. Don’t get me wrong…he is a really nice man and I doubt he was any more interested in me than I was in him. It looked good on paper, but not in real life. We exchanged the typical information, amd then I asked the question I was dying to ask…” How is this online thing working for you?” Well…he told me about several women he had dated. Told me that a couple of them only wanted sex and he felt a little used. I told him that was probably payback for his younger years.
He was very honest. He told me he had no idea what he was looking for. Then he asked me what I was looking for…and I had a feeling of complete joy.
“Nothing,” I said. “I am looking for nothing…I really have it all right now. Great job, wonderful family, funny and interesting friends, new hobbies I am excited about. I am so happy that I am not really looking for anything.”
He asked, “You don’t want to get married and settle down?”
“No,” I answered. And I meant it. And while it scares me a little that I am not looking for ever after…it also makes me happy.
What a great ending to a mediocre experience. I hope he finds what he is looking for! He is a nice man.
I made the decision to go grey a few weeks ago. Actually, I had been wanting to do it for a long time but couldn't find a stylist who seemed keen on working with me. I am 53, a school teacher and look probably 10 years younger, and i was being told 
I wrote this in 2003 and recently discovered it in a desk drawer!
HI, Sylvestercat,
Do an online search of the topic "housing exchange," or "house- or home- exchange," and lots of things will pop up.
There is a busy hot-topic conversation thread going on under "Other Topics" and "Shared Housing Alternatives" on
Good for you! What a grand position to be in.
Yea you! Being completely satisfied is a wonderful feeling.
Vicky — I’m totally into your dating saga, and I love this chapter. I also love that you’ve built such a wonderful support system on VN. We are all hoping that you will find a companion who will be a true addition to your life. It appears that you are willing to take your time to find the right guy.
You got it all right on this date. Nothing increases your attractiveness so dramatically as letting a man know that you’re in a good place, not needy, and not looking for someone to deliver you unto previously unattainable bliss.
I love it! I am at that place too! My circumstances haven’t really gotten better but my attitude has. I don’t worry anymore about what I don’t have or what I could have. Its all in your attitude. I used to say “something good is going to happen to you… and to me too!” Now, I am saying, “God is blessing and I want to be a blessing to others.” It works!
And this is coming from the lady who went skydiving on her 55th birthday back on June 17th. It’s all in your attitude.
Hi Vicky
Cool story. I do think you’re looking for something-just not a guy like the one you wrote about. It’s such a liberating feeling when you have set yourself up emotionally and financially to the point where you can be as choosy as you want. I have learned very nice “exit” lines and will settle for nothing less than intelligent, attractive, and young. But that’s just me. I’m my experience it’s a waste of time to date a boring, complaining, sweaty, unsuccessful guy! If that is the only choice then I have more fun with my female friends and hobbies!