I was living with my boyfriend for 6 years we have been together for 8, but there was a problem with my boyfriend and my son’s relationship. So i asked him to move out.
But now he comes over 2 -3 nights a week he was taking me out to dinner once a week, but most the time he just come over and watches tv and falls asleep on the cough because he works hard and then we go to bed, he like to fish a lot and goes to nascar races with his buddies and does guy things and i’m getting tired of waiting for him to show up, i want to talk to him but there’s never a good time. We went out more when we lived together.
i do love him very much but i’m not sure what tomorrow will bring after 8 years there no talk about marriage or even the future, how do i tell him how i feel with out making him mad but i feel i’m getting a raw deal here.
He is 57 and i am 54, it’s time to grow up and make some life plans or call it quits because i don’t want to be a lifetime girl friend or live apart but that is to soon before he can totally move back in until we would go to some counseling for his behavior with my 14 year old son, i think my son is a very good and caring teenager and he loves me, my son is my priority in life.
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One of the greatest things about Vibrant Nation is the forum it creates for open, honest discussion-----to agree or disagree.
The point of my post is this. Every time we harbor ill feelings or ill will or anger----we are setting off a chemi
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WONDERFUL.....I am in a similar situation..I actually don't want to get married. Our relationship gets better and better with each passing day
Dear Donna,
I am so happy to hear that you and your husband are facing your situation together and practicing yoga breathing. Please check in and let me know how things turn out for you.
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You seem to have a good understanding of the problem. If you weren’t worried about him being upset what would you do? Take care of yourself first because if you don’t no one else will. My advice would be not to be avaliable so often and so much. Make plans even if it’s to meet a friend for a walk or a lecture at the local library. Make plans for yourself. I’ve always found that if you want to see if there’s a relationship stop paddling (as in a canoe) and see what happens. If the other person genuninly cares for you they will make an effort. If they don’t you have to decide if that’s what you want for yourself.
Waiting for someone “to grow up” isn’t a good thing. What it looks like to me is that you’ve stopped “dating” and have settled into a routine. Instead of “waiting for him to show up,” I agree with Watermusic. Make other plans, do stuff you like to do. Your entire life doesn’t have to be wrapped up in him; you’re entitled to enjoy your own life, as much as he’s entitled to his. Start having dates with yourself! ♥
You deserve better than that. It’s hard to give up the familiar, but I’d say get out and casually date a little, restart your own life, you don’t have to tell him, just don’t be available. It just sounds so much like he’s treating you as an FWB, using your love for him as leverage.
If he can’t respect your son — and you’ve stated your position on that — there are lots of men out there who would be far better for you. The moment you start finding yourself ‘waiting around’ for the guy, then he’s got you on a string…don’t take it!!