I’m in a long distance marriage. Some call it a “commuter marriage” but it’s long distance no matter what you call it. It has just as many drawbacks as a typical marriage where couples see each other every day, but it works if you work it. My husband and I have developed several ways to keep our marriage hot and heavy:
- We always pick each other up at the airport. While we work independently throughout the week, we alternate spending weekends together, and once a month we take a short trip together. Even after 7 years, I still get giddy while I’m riding the escalator waiting for his face to appear at the bottom of the stairs.
- Flowers for the Lady. When we met, my husband promised me “flowers forever.” In all that time he has only missed sending me flowers once, and that’s because he was on a business trip. Even my assistant knows to leave an empty vase on the table before leaving on Thursday afternoons!
- Dinner Every Friday. A benefit of a long distance marriage is that we get to spend the first night of every trip having a long, quiet dinner. This gives us an opportunity to ease back into our relationship by letting go of all of the things we’ve been doing and battling throughout the week. We catch up on each other’s lives and experiences all while flirting and touching at the table. By the end of the main course and the first bottle of wine, we’re ready to come home and have dessert.
- Frigerator Favorites. I always shop for my hubby’s favorite foods before he comes to visit and he does the same for me. It’s nice to know that when it comes to tasty treats there’s my husband and there are some real snacks in the refrigerator.
- Date Night. I’ll never understand why people stop dating once they get married. Date nights are when my husband and I enjoy each other the most…when we’re out and about, experiencing and sharing something we enjoy together.
For the record, long distance marriages suck–your partner isn’t always there when you need them, you’re not always there when you’re needed, and you can’t tweet intimacy. But like I said, it works if you work it. No, I don’t get to sleep next to my husband every night, but that only makes me look forward to cuddling up next to him every Friday even more! And spending a few days away from him during the week fuels my urge to run up and wrap my arms around him when he steps off the plane. Somehow we’ve managed to find a happy medium where we constantly fall in love with each other over and over again every weekend! How amazing is that?
I got before and after pics copied and pasted in the reply box and tried to post, but the only things that shows up is the text I typed, not the photos.
Thanks May & Janice for all your helpful comments. I really appreciate them.
May - for the longest time, I said to myself that I will never want any plastic surgery done and that I will accept my body for what it is. Like many typical wome
Sounds like you have a deliciously romantic marriage. p.s. My husband works VERY long hours so if a date means going out for pancakes at IHOP at midnight…I am showered, dressed and waiting for him at the door.
Debi,
As with all marriages, it has its downs and ups. Love makes the commute worth it. However, sometimes, commuting is just plain complex. The truth is there’s a plus and minus to all relationships. It’s the choices, how smart we are about them and the effort we put in that make it work well or not. Pragmatism mixed with rose colored glasses help.