Boomer women have raised ourselves on spiritual texts from eras and regions previously regarded as “secret knowledge,” available only to an elite.
When many of us were still in elementary and high school, esoteric presses were founded, importing mystical traditions from the ancient East and the mountains of Peru to the Desert Fathers and the Kabbalah. The Internet accelerated access to spiritual secrets from every corner of the world, as we embraced prayers downloaded from Africa and rituals from the Navajos.
We didn’t stop there. Many of us have compounded our exposure to spiritual traditions with the cutting-edge of psychological knowledge. If we didn’t actually go to a consciousness movement course like EST or Lifespring (but many of us did), we went to a 12-step program, got formal training as therapists or life coaches or, at the very least, turned on the TV and got our education from watching Oprah.
The depth and breadth of the spiritual roots of our generation of women became quickly obvious to me last week, as Vibrant Nation hosted its first in-person event for members: The Art of Resilience.
About thirty of us, including some of our Vibrant Nation staff, gathered together in a meeting room at Gilda’s Club in Louisville, putting faces to user names for the first time.
At the first handshake, I was introduced to therapists, life coaches, authors and wise women from many fields, both working and retired, who brought their eclectic spiritual backgrounds with them to the mini-retreat.
The stories we shared—both from our personal lives as well as the spiritual and philosophical wells from which we drew—were rich, deep and diverse. But what struck me the most was the spiritual quality most hard-won through the living of one’s life: our humility.
It soon became clear to all of us that given the uncharted nature of our times, nobody has all the answers. In shared honesty and vulnerability, there was something we could all agree on: that we are all being asked to put our knowledge to the test.
How is your trust in life doing in these uncertain times? What shape is your spirit in? Is there value in living through a time of struggle and loss? Do you have what it takes to be one of those women who thrive no matter what?
Many found inspiration in that retreat room not because at this moment of economic and societal uncertainty it was about finding the answers — but rather, because it was such a privilege to be in the company of others who are at least remembering to continue asking the bigger questions about meaning, purpose, love and life — no matter what.
And, too, sometimes you just have to take a time-out and find something to laugh about together. When I think of the times we’re in — and the spiritual testing in which many of us are engaged — I can call upon a favorite story of mine from the 12-step tradition that I can count on to raise at least a chuckle.
As the story goes, a woman had been taking a walk on a high mountain path when she slipped and fell over the side, grabbing onto an overhanging branch. The woman was dangling one hundred feet above the valley floor, when suddenly the branch began to crack.
This woman cried out for help.
“God, are you up there?”
“Yes, my daughter,” God replied. “What can I do for you?”
“God, help me. Tell me what to do!” she cried.
“You really want to know?”
The branch cracked a bit more.
Desperate, she cried out again.
“Yes, God. Tell me! I’ll do whatever you say.”
There was a moment’s silence. Then God replied:
“Let go of the branch.”
“Let go of the branch?”
“Yes, my daughter. Let go of the branch.”
There was another moment’s silence, then the woman asked:
“Is there anybody else up there?”
If you can at least smile, congratulations! You’ve passed the resilience test.
Agreed. I never thought I was vain until I had a mastectomy at age 39. I was devastated and told the doc I wanted to wake up with implants. Now at age 60, I am lopsided and wondering if I was just avoiding the inevitable. You get what you get and you
Sounds very interesting.
Spike, you are awesome! Love your perspective, thanks for sharing.
Here I am responding to myself! I woke up this morning realizing that in addition to humility, there was another great take-away from this gathering: optimism. Regardless of the issues we are facing, this group embodied the spirit of resilience with an irrepressible faith in life. You are an inspiration!
Hi Carol,
I had the retreat on my calendar and ended up having to clean out my Mom’s room at the nursing home. She is hospitalized and won’t be able to go back to her home of six years. It seemed all important then but I think I really missed something.
On the subject of resilience, I guess I have discovered it comes down to us. We are the ones that choose to develop habits that benefit us and feed our soul or habits that hender our well being and leave us dry. For years I let excuses keep me in the same place for too long.
A retreat sounded like a great idea because it allows and puts importance on relaxing, laughing, and learning from others.
I guess that is what life coaches are for also. To suggest changes that benefit our well being. Do you have a life coach?
I hope to be part of your next retreat session.
Hi Carol, Thank you for your article about resilience and optimisim. I am in process with many ups and downs. Fear of failure and anxiety about life restrict and limit me at times. As a newcomer to this sight, I’m looking forward to inspiration from the community and hopefully inspiring others with my own story.