The last time I needed to look for a new job, the worst thing happened to me. I’d been let go from my senior role with a global marketing company and had just sent out a flurry of emails to my likeliest prospects. Immediately, just as I’d hoped, I got a response back. A competitor wanted to talk with me as soon as possible. So why was that the worst thing that could have happened to me?
In brief, while I pinned all my hopes on the position materializing, I was not so much wooed as dangled. There was just enough communication on their part to make me think this job possibility was always on the verge of coming to fruition. After several months, they just kind of faded away — and I’d lost precious time in the job-hunting process.
But rudeness, disorganization, indecision and disrespect aside, the worst thing was not how the company treated me. It was, rather, that I allowed myself to concentrate all my hopes on this as the one opportunity I was sure was destined to save me. I hadn’t taken the opportunity for introspection to see if continuing in the same type of position was what I actually wanted to do, nor had I pursued other possibilities.
Sharing my story with friends, I began realizing how often so many of us focus on the one thing we think we really want or think we need to have, be it a particular job, a living situation, relationship or even the perfect volunteer opportunity. Only when the one thing that is meant to be right for us crashes and burns do we finally open ourselves up to, well, everything else.
In my case, the lead that eventually connected me to my new job came from someone I’d met at an industry conference, long before I’d been downsized from my job. He was starting a website in the social marketing arena and I remember thinking at the time “what a cool idea.” Of course, at my age and stage in life, I never seriously thought about starting a new career — let alone one situated in cyberspace. In fact, the field in which I eventually landed hadn’t even existed when I’d originally set my career course years ago.
Nevertheless, I dug up his card and gave him a call. In less time than it had taken for my first prospect to return a single one of my calls, I was hired. Once I stopped fixating on “the one job” and opened myself to exploring the possibilities, I realized that fate was afoot, after all, delivering an opportunity to me that exceeded even my wildest expectations.
The truth is that life does not always match our ideas regarding what we think we deserve. It is true that you may have to dig deeper and network broader, stretching yourself to think increasingly out-of-the-box. But the good news is that when you open yourself up to the wider range of possibilities, while you may not actually get what you think you want — you may well get more.
You are stronger when you can accept those things that you cannot change, and you are smarter when you do something you never dreamt of doing. The benefit of reaching beyond expectations can be better than the outcome of the expectations themselves.
Thank you for the blog post. I am sure a lot of people are feeling upset regarding their situation in this economic situation, but this post definately enlightened me and I found peace within myself.
this is a terrific post Carol. I’ll read it over and over. It reminds me that women are always breaking new ground and calling it Holy. Looks Good on You!
Carol,
Isn’t it amazing how much we find out about ourselves when we expand our horizons beyond what we perceive our limitations or interest. We spend countless hours running after a dream, a job, a mate and it is just around the corner if we just open our eyes to the possibilities. Great story and so much in it that I can identify with.
I believe that when one door closes another opens. God bless you for sharing in the great time of need.
I’m deeply touched by your responses. I’m always surprised when I share my vulnerability and people turn towards not away!
I teach…… well, Ha! (I wrote that without thinking, but it illustrates how I feel.) I’m not teaching now, I was laid off this school year because of the California State budget mess, so I’m not working right now and it’s so hard. On top of that, I have a back injury, and it’s difficult for me to find a job I can actually do in this small town. For so long, I was what I did…… “I am a teacher”. Even with all the red tape and other difficulties, I LOVE teaching! Now, I have to find who I am without my students. I believe without doubt there is an open window somewhere, but I can’t seem to quit looking at that closed door. Your posting here gives me hope. Thank you…
You’re welcome! I wonder if there’s an online course that could use a teacher? I hear its a growing field/..//
Your story hit home as I have found myself looking for a job after being let go from a job I planned on retiring from. I thought I could get a new one with no hassels, but found myself on unemployment, but then when I stepped back and took a look at myself, I thought about going back to school to learn something new. Maybe start my own business? It has been hard to get started but now I am going full steam ahead. So thanks for your story it helped. Carolyn Lindsey