The last time I saw Mark, he had been downsized from what he had thought was the peak of his career. The pink slip came out of the blue, and Mark had no likely prospects in sight.
“I’ve contacted everybody I can think of, sent my resume to all the headhunters, answered every appropriate job in the listings, and nada,” he told me over coffee at Starbucks. It was going on four months for Mark. I vividly recall him telling me that “While I started out optimistic, I’ve come to accept that nobody’s going to want me at my age. I just got rejected from a job at a quarter of my former salary and the whole company is smaller than the support staff I had personally. I’m thinking about looking into early retirement, but what a shame: I’ve got so much more to give.”
The least I could do was pick up the tab for his cappuccino and biscotti. Happily employed for going on two years, after a similar bout of downsized-itis, I had equal parts compassion and survivor’s guilt. As we stood up to leave, I told him I’d keep my eye out for something suitable, as well as send positive thoughts for him out into the universe.
I did a better job at sending out positive thoughts than sending him leads, but never mind. I got a phone call from Mark yesterday. He has been tapped to be chief operating officer of a global entertainment company. He’s at the top of the heap of 1200 employees and his salary is even bigger than the job he’d lost.
“Which of your job-hunting efforts led to this?” I asked, delighted at his happy ending.
“None,” he said. “It came out of the blue.”
Seems that a search consultant had been retained to find someone with just Mark’s skills, credentials and personality. Above all, they valued his seniority and seasoned expertise. He’d been scouted on Linked-In, noting all the positive things people had to say about him online, and within weeks of his first interview, the job had materialized.
“They must not have gotten the memo about your being too old,” I said.
“Guess not!” he laughed.
I would have liked to talk more, but he had to run. I’m heading to China on business,” he explained.
I realize in retrospect that I wasn’t the only one putting good thoughts out into the universe on Mark’s behalf. He’s a good guy who deserves his good fortune. And as it turns out, it really was the positive energy — rather than the referrals — that did the trick.
When, like Mark, fate knocks us to the ground, it is natural to believe that our luck has run out, and nothing good will ever happen to us again. But the truth is, we have no more control over the good things that happen to us than we do over the bad. Pink slips can come out of the blue, but so can job offers beyond our expectations.
It is as if until the surprise call comes in we are on the other side of a dam, standing in a dried up river bed. Behind the concrete wall, unbeknownst to us, the water of all our good deeds, contacts, karma and yes, other people’s fondest wishes for us, is piling up. Invisible to us, we think absolutely nothing is happening then suddenly, one last drop of luck takes it over the top. The water that has been dammed up begins to flow freely again, and we are once again neck-deep happily paddling away down the river of life.
So remember, the next time you think it’s all over for you, it is true you can’t always stop the bad things from happening. But you can’t stop the good things from happening, either.
ReginaLove, that is SO great to hear! As for soy, it may help with menopause symptoms -- it it controversial. The best way to use soy is in the form of whole fermented soy foods (miso, tempeh, tamari and natto). Non-fermented soy foods such as soy mi
Agreed. I never thought I was vain until I had a mastectomy at age 39. I was devastated and told the doc I wanted to wake up with implants. Now at age 60, I am lopsided and wondering if I was just avoiding the inevitable. You get what you get and you
Sounds very interesting.
Spike, you are awesome! Love your perspective, thanks for sharing.
Great story…Happy ending but the reality is…For the guy on the street who may not have Mark’s super impressive resume, it is tough…really tough when you are competing for a position with men and women half your age. We are a very youth oriented society and though we are being told how much spending power we have (baby boomers)…It is hard to get excited about that when you don’t have the $$$ to spend! I LOVE your sun will come out tomorrow attitude but sorry…I’m just not feeling it !!
Carol, good timing. Please send out good thoughts into the universe for me too. Everything you said I know already. But when it actually happens, it’s easy to get caught up in the insecurities and doubts. Good thoughts! I like it. My husband had a similar experience. He refused to send out a short resume on a job that he was perfect for. It was a job that popped up on Monster Job. Instead, he sent out a 3 page resume, something that is a no-no. He didn’t hear back for a month. Apparently, they finally got down to his and guess what, he was perfect for the position. They flew us out, not just him, and after 4 days, he was excepting his new job. Part of it was his experience and the fact that he gave them more than the short resume. Also, his age!
I was able to look at this post from many different perspectives: I owned a relocation business for many years and would have been the person working with many people just like Mark. I have also been out of work due to a chronic illness which ended up being a wrong diagnosis but it took seven years to uncover. I am a life coach who works with people in transition: job loss, career shift, downsize, empty nest and finally, I am also an adjudicator for EI appeals which means I hear the appeals of people who have been refused EI for whatever reason. I go to a lot of networking meetings, I do a lot of volunteer work and I hear a lot of stories from people who are desperately trying to rebuild after losing a job. It occurs to me that, firstly, experience oft times is not appreciated: not always though so hang in there. I am also struck by the number of temp agencies that have sprung up and the way they run their businesses: it makes me grateful I do not have to avail myself of their services if I were the “regular man on the street” person. I am also struck by the choice to open doors, close doors, keep them open, shut them tight perspective different people hold. I have seen many people lose an opportunity to have a job because they presented themselves poorly at an interview by speaking poorly about somebody. If you do that in an interview what will you be like at the job site? I have only ever applied for one job: all the rest of them came as offers from employers or contractors and that usually came about by a recommendation from somebody who knew me for a while in a volunteer capacity. Don’t underestimate the value of volunteering and networking but I’d add a caveat with that: don’t be in a hurry either because then you’ll just frustrate yourself and create negative energy.
I do believe that our thoughts become our words become our deeds and that rings true no matter what you do or who you are or where you go.
Living la vida fearless, Jan
Love this and so true. We sometimes just have to wait for the calm to settle so the universe can course correct for us.
Debi -
sometimes I have to look up at the photo and the author’s name to double check to see if I wrote it. (^_^)
Your feelings precisely mirror my own.
Truth of the matter is “It’s on its way. I am available to more good than I’ve ever experienced, realized, or imagined before.”
Be happy.
Interesting discussion. I think there’s some valid tension between acceptance and optimism. I’ve been accused of being an out-of-touch optimist, but I’d personally rather live with this than being a reality-based pessimist. The philosopher WIlliam James once told the story of two mountaineers who were in a life and death situation, facing a chasm that may have been a bit too far to jump across. One mountaineer said “I can do this thing”, the other said “It’s hopeless.” They both had to jump or die. Who do you think had the better chance of making it across?