We 50+ers have a vigorous conversation going online and off that reveals the ambivalence many of us share regarding notions of aging.
The conversation is inspired by the entry Older models in demand by Carine Fabius, who takes umbrage at touting 70-year-old models who look 40 something as symbols of that to which we midlife-and-beyond women should aspire.
VN member Dearpru counters, “Does anybody want to look in the mirror and see who they really are?” While another of us, Cathy Fischer, cites athletic 50-year-olds playing tennis portrayed as the typical user of Depends, to ask: “I wonder what the young girls coming up are going to think about what age actually looks like?”
The dialogue around looking our age–or not–points to a rift developing in midlife-women-and-beyond circles in terms of how to define images of healthy aging. The issue goes beyond the merely physical. In fact, this goes to one of the essential life questions with which every woman 50+—let alone anyone in the marketing community who hopes to market effectively to us—struggles to resolve.
What comprises “productive aging?” This is the core issue that Zalman Schacter-Shalomi addresses in his brilliant book, From Age-Ing to Sage-Ing: A Profound New Vision of Growing Older.
But there’s an equally strong movement brewing that has to do with taking advantage of one’s extended years to develop a new stage of life that has previously been reserved for an elite who managed to make it to the peak of the adult development pyramid. Traditionally referred to as “sages,” these are individuals who are unconcerned with prolonging midlife, and dedicated to developing aspects and capabilities of spirituality, perspective, wisdom and mentorship that are possible only towards the later portions of a long, rich lifespan.
Abraham Mazlow, who introduced the pyramid model in the 1950’s, contended that only 3 percent of the population would achieve the peak of adult development. However, given the longevity revolution and the particular constellation of circumstances which make Boomers different than their parents in many ways, including aging, the percentage will undoubtedly go much higher. In fact, sage-identifiers may someday in the not too distant future even come to constitute if not the majority, a critical mass.
This alternative notion doesn’t view organic aging as failure, but rather as fulfillment. This attitude does not deny the losses associated with aging, but uses coming to terms with physical diminishments as a “major developmental task that helps awaken the elder state of consciousness, with its promise of expanded mental potentials, spiritual renewal, and greater social usefulness.”
At 50+, many of us, let alone marketers who hope to connect with us, are just now seriously thinking about the options. Let’s hope that as a minimum, we may develop the wisdom to know that it is at least possible that we won’t ever have to so much choose, as we will embrace: our own special blend of defiance and accommodation.
Agreed. I never thought I was vain until I had a mastectomy at age 39. I was devastated and told the doc I wanted to wake up with implants. Now at age 60, I am lopsided and wondering if I was just avoiding the inevitable. You get what you get and you
Sounds very interesting.
Spike, you are awesome! Love your perspective, thanks for sharing.
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