One Woman’s Experience with Erectile Dysfunction

February 23, 2012 at 10:01 am in Love & Sex by Walker Thornton

Erectile Dysfunction. Uncomfortable. Frustrating. Emotional. Not the end of the world.

Today men can take a pill and voila, in a matter of minutes, find themselves experiencing that same old erection they used to achieve. Harder, firmer… ready to roll. If you’ve never been with a man who has any form of ED it can be an uncomfortable moment. What to do? Do I help? Is it because of me? Can I fix it? Or maybe you’re ready to retreat and find someone more ‘functional’.

The pill is a miracle worker. It can give back that youthful virility and allow him to have successful sexual intercourse. It won’t solve any underlying psychological issues or cure any physiological problems. But, I suspect that the male ego is bolstered by the return of a firm erection and becomes more confident and sexier.

A friend asked me to tell her how it worked, from a practical point. She and her husband are in their late 40′s I think and apparently are not having any issues with ED. And, she knew that I had dated a man who took one of the 3 popular ED medications. I was rather surprised that she didn’t know anything about it, then I realized… many women probably don’t. I’ve talked about this today at A Woman’s Page, and I’ve written about it here on Vibrant Nation.  This is a more personal angle.

My guy took Levitra. Not every day but on those occasions when we were seeing each other. We timed it once. It took about 20 minutes, roughly. It’s difficult to pinpoint. He needs to be aroused to get an erection–the medicine will not cause a spontaneous erection (thank heavens!). From what I observed the meds gave him a firm and larger erection, due to the increased blood flow. So, where he might have lost a little firmness at the crucial moment, with the meds he could sustain an erection through a long period of foreplay and arousal. AND… he could get another erection later in the evening.  That interval might depend on age and the normal process of recovery.

What I found the most fascinating was the change in attitude. An added boost of self-confidence in seeing visual proof of his virility. I found him sexy, period. But men are more defined by their penis than women are by their vaginas.  What a silly sentence. Just as men talk about their jobs as an extension of who they are. Their penises are often the focal point of their sexuality.

I used to think the downside of dating men my age (57) and older was the whole issue of flaccidity. Aging and all its droopy bits and pieces. Well… sex is not just about intercourse and there are myriad ways we can pleasure ourselves and our partners. Honestly, since the men aren’t listening, intercourse for me is less exciting than other forms of stimulation. Though I do love the intensity and intimacy that comes from intercourse. And, the advent of Viagra, Levitra and Cialis means I can have it all.


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