Today’s Featured Comment
I am not beautiful, but I had the heady experience of dazzling a young man recently.
We were strangers sitting together at a restaurant, and it so happened i was not only up to date in his career field, and therefore knew as much as he did, but also I had thought about certain things he hadn’t, and our discussion was spirited and full of verve.
At the end of the lunch I could tell I’d snapped that young man’s head around – he was attracted but he didn’t know why. I’m old enough to have been his mother, so he was confused. It was the totality of my brain, confidence, and not-bad-for-57 looks. What an ego boost. I not only felt “beautiful”, I felt dangerous. Wahoo!
[This comment was originally posted in this conversation. ~ Eds]
What makes you feel beautiful?
I made the decision to go grey a few weeks ago. Actually, I had been wanting to do it for a long time but couldn't find a stylist who seemed keen on working with me. I am 53, a school teacher and look probably 10 years younger, and i was being told 
I wrote this in 2003 and recently discovered it in a desk drawer!
HI, Sylvestercat,
Do an online search of the topic "housing exchange," or "house- or home- exchange," and lots of things will pop up.
There is a busy hot-topic conversation thread going on under "Other Topics" and "Shared Housing Alternatives" on
You are beautiful, Lynne!
I agree with Vonnie… you ARE beautiful!
Love it! I had a similar experience about ten years ago and my heart still skips a beat when I think about it! Lol
I’m still amazed how a sixty year old man can date/marry a thirty year old and know one blinks!
And, I agree, you are a lovely lady!
Isn’t this the most amazing feeling? As I get older I have the same experience over and over like this. To finally have a lot of knowledge and know how to put it together to see a bigger picture, because you’ve been there, done that, read the books, done the work. It’s an intoxicating feeling of power that would be easy to abuse. Sometimes I have to pull back a bit!
I have to laugh when you say you aren’t beautiful. You are physically beautiful, but intellectually as well, and that’s what hit this guy. Most girls his age are trying to be appealing and so basically give him what they think he is looking for, they are hoping to be liked, so the whole interaction is false in a way, because they are looking for his approval – and on some level he is looking for theirs.
But when this problem is out of the way, and some real conversation can take place, it can be amazing. I dated a wonderful man during my separation and the first year of my divorce who pointed out to me all the ways I was attractive to men. My husband had never mentioned any of these things, and at first I thought this guy was just flattering me to get me into bed. But he made me aware of it, and my self-esteem grew as I noticed other men’s reactions to these things for the first time. It was really empowering, and I am very thankful for the awareness and so glad my friend helped me with this during a time I really did not feel strong, smart or attractive in any way.
It’s really not what we look like that makes us sexy. It’s confidence. Nobody wants to be with a needy, desperate person. So the next time you want to make an impression, simply be confident and watch what happens.
Well said….very encouraging!