| New relationship @ 55 |
Just found out the person I have been in a committed relationship with for almost two years has been married twice. I knew about the first one and then found out about the second one while I was online. I confronted him with it on the phone and he said “I wanted to tell you but I felt like such a loser”. I am really hurt, but still love him. Why would he keep this from me?
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there are some dating coaches who are excellent for women like you. one is jonathon asley. not sure if i spelled it right. he also help you with your online profile and manages each email with you. try him. a good sense of men and woman.georgia, why will you never marry the man 20 yrs younger? is he against it? are you? my lover will not even consider dating me with the intention of getting to know me better as a possible lifelong partner, due to age difference and what his friends are you living with this man? is he concerned with what people will say? does it bother him to walk hand in hand with you in public? are you planning marriage or?georgia, why will you never marry the man 20 yrs younger? is he against it? are you? my lover will not even consider dating me with the intention of getting to know me better as a possible lifelong partner, due to age difference and what his friends 
Anonymous:
Remember the saying, "the grass always looks greener on the other side?"
If you are unhappy and want a divorce that is one thing. Isn't it worth writing a letter to your husband and sticking it on the dashboard of his car so you
This kind of news is not the type of thing that one keeps to himself. I’m dating a man who told me the first time that I met him that he had been divorced twice. I admit it… it was a little surprising to me, but I’m glad that he told me right away. I would have been hurt if I had had to find out this information on my own.
It could be that he’s embarrassed, but it’s so important to be upfront with someone.
I sympathize with your feelings, that awful realization that the person you love is in some way unable to be complete straight about things. I was also with a man (for 2 years) who had been married before, for five years, and didn’t tell me. His lies about that were only the tip of a iceberg, and the relationship failed when I tired of his lies.
The real dilemma is that it points out a potential underlying insecurity in him – and although of course you love him, ask yourself, does this new information in any way change your feeling of security in the relationship. Do you deserve better…is honesty important…or can you live with the possibility that there are other things he hasn’t told you. I chose to let my guy go, painful as it was, and tbh have since found a guy who is so honest it drives me bonkers, and he’s not nearly as sexy etc., but you know, every day I get up and think, ‘no more knots in the stomach…I’m happy now’.
Best wishes!
Whatever his reason for keeping this from you, you are going to have to be able to reestablish trust in the relationship if it is to continue. Time to get clear with yourself that you deserve an honest relationship with someone (NO excuses) and then sit down with him and get it all out in the open. Love has nothing to do with this. This is about the opportunity you have now to establish a totally trusting relationship with him from this moment forward.