5 Tips For A Successful First Date With A New Man

Tip #1 Leave Your Past in the Past

In college, the motto my friends and I always lived by was, "what happens at college stays at college."  The same goes for your ex on a first date.  Leave him out of the conversation other than to say you were married and divorced. Men consider ex bashing or troubles with the ex too much drama to deal with at this early stage of the dating game.

Tip #2 Don’t Give out Too Much Information about Yourself on a First Date

Often we think we are doing ourselves a favor giving a man too much information about ourselves on a first date so he has it all before he makes up his mind about dating us. First Dates are nothing more then meet and greets to determine if you’d like to get to know each other better.

Plus, information a man can handle further in the dating cycle is totally different then what he wants or needs to know on a first date.  Remember, you are not your problems, so he doesn’t need to know them at this point.

Tip #3 Be Sure Talking is Balanced Between the Two of You

When people are nervous they have a tendency to jibber jabber on and on about themselves to fill the silent gaps.  This doesn’t work well on a date.  In fact, it’s quite boring for the other person listening to the monologue.

Be sure to ask a man a lot of questions.  If you find yourself talking continuously for more then a minute or two without him saying a word, then be aware that you are probably over talking.

A first date is a time for sharing a lot of surface information about your likes and interests on different topics.  Your goal is to find common threads between you to see if you want to take this to a second date.

Tip #4 Be Present During Your Date

Put your cell phone away so you can really engage in a conversation with the man you’re with.  A man wants to feel as if you are interested in getting to know him and that he is more important then anything your phone might be showing you in the moment.  Plus, as we age multitasking is a lot harder to do.  You’ll probably find you didn’t hear a word he said if you’re on your phone, texting during your date. And it’s pretty embarrassing to look up over your reading glasses and say, "Could you please repeat that?"

Tip #5  Put Your Most Feminine Side Forward on that First Date and Let Him Be the Man

We as women are so used to taking care of others and anticipating their needs that we forget and automatically start trying to make life easier for the man sitting across the table from us on a first date. Stop yourself before it starts!

Let him take care of the bad service you are getting or the bad food.  Don’t tell him how he should have handled a situation and for sure don’t criticize him for what he eats or how he walks or talks. If you find you don’t like this man, then walk away.  Don’t settle.  There is someone else out there better suited for you.

Much love and joy to you, Lisa


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